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Lillycakes062014

Online only dom/sub?

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Lillycakes062014
Posted

Does anyone do online only dom/sub things? I'm really new to all of this and I'm also extremely shy, so I don't think I could meet someone in real life. Any help would be great! Thanks. 

  • Like 3
Posted
I have done it, it's a great way to experiment and see if it's something that you really want. ..and you never know it might lead to a real life thing
  • Like 2
SotaZero
Posted
Yes, it is a great way to feel out what you enjoy.
Lillycakes062014
Posted

Oh great! How do I tell good ones from the bad ones? 

  • Like 1
Posted
I’m new to this as well and I goind that just by talking to them and discussing what is it they are looking for and what you are looking for is a great way to start. Talk to them not just about fetish things but everyday things to. That is the best way to get the feel of the person and if you click. Set up and discuss everything before agreeing to do tasks so you both comfortable with what is expected.
  • Like 1
Posted
lillycake if you would like any help or advise i am always around to help new people into the lifestyle x
  • Like 3
Posted
I have had a couple of virtual Doms & I have found it to be extremely difficult on a psychological level. In order to allow a Dom to own you you have to be able to trust them 100% but online people can just tell you what they want you to hear. If any tasks are set for you and/or pictures are exchanged then you are handing this all over to someone you have never met. I have always been into bdsm & personally would never have had a virtual Dom without real experience & knowledge. Because I have been both a Dom & now a sub I consider myself to be quite strong minded in what I do & what I want but playing with someone online, I found stripped that away from me leaving me feeling quite vulnerable & not a position I’m sure I would put myself in again. It wasn’t a bad experience, in fact quite the opposite but I found it very tough mentally. Everyone is different & handles things differently but for me, if I was new to this area I would spend time getting to know some Dom’s then lead upto those first few meetings but only once you feel comfortable. With the right Dom, he will make you feel totally at ease as that’s his role.
  • Like 3
PatientTraveller
Posted

Online is a good way to get started especially if you new and shy; it is different relationship, but it is a good way to get a feel of what your like and don't like within a safer environment...good thing is it helps you develop communicate first...

To be fair, if the communication isn't right in both directions or somebody isn't play attention, then the virtual route can be problematic and disappointing. Without good communication, it is hard to build up trust.

Don't rush, take your time and go slow, online communication can easily be misunderstood or interpreted. 

How to tell the difference from the good and the bad ones, your can only learn which is which through interaction...trust you instincts and research "red flags", "Predatory Dom's" and "Geek Dom's"...there is plenty of information and advice online. 

Main thing is protect yourself, once pics are out of your hands, they are out of your control...from a previous post...don't hand out your personal details and name.

Good luck and have fun, if in doubt slow down, stop and/or ask for help...BDSM is a community.

  • Like 4
CuteLiLFukToy
Posted
I've done it online...I like it.
Posted
On 14/01/2018 at 2:44 PM, Lillycakes062014 said:

Oh great! How do I tell good ones from the bad ones? 

Those who ask for huge sums of money up front, exceding that of £50 are likely to be financial Dominants who just want your money. 

Those who charge over £200 per hour for in person or online sessions are usually escort mistresses (ones who may include physical sex). If it’s purely BDSM you want (no physical sex) seek out those who have websites and photos of them at work - some galleries might be pay to view with new law changes. They usually choose the wording of their sites very carefully too to be clear about their difference to escort type mistresses ... but you can find some who offer both, just remember purely BDSM Mistresses WILL be insulted if you ask for sex. 

 

Good luck

Posted

I'd really like to give this a go. Tried with a dominatrix off another site but ended up getting blackmailed. Any genuine female doms want to help me out 

eyemblacksheep
Posted

online isn't something I've particularly been into myself, but, have watched and know others who do.

I think first off there's a world of difference between M/f (which the owner seems to seek) and F/m (which advice seems to be bias towards) 

Anyway, advertising for a Male online Dominant is going to swell your inbox. There'll be a mixture of potentially good people - and some utter idiots.

If they're opening gambit is to assume the role (you get a message like "Down on your knees, slut") then they've already enforced a Dynamic you didn't consent to and are likely worth sacking off.

If they message you with all this great experience that doesn't seem to tie together - then they're lying to try to impress you, definitely sack them off.

Experience or inexperience... everyone has to start somewhere, so someone new isn't necessarily bad - but - honesty is important.

Also if tasks seem to be little above "send me nude pictures" or "go in the street without knickers on" or anything which could cross your lines or get you into trouble - then they're probably not really that understanding of the lifestyle.  Remember, too many guys just want *anything* 

  • Like 1
eyemblacksheep
Posted

and for those seeking a F online Domme.

Expect to pay.

This doesn't mean all women are looking for money, not at all - but most of the online F led relationships were built up over time and friendship, if you want a quick win - then - well, check your pockets.

Posted

I would to try bein an online sub of anyone would be up for training me 

Ron
Posted

Any dom's?


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