No one to PLAY with..

[Deleted Member]

Being in that situation for a long time since losing my fiancee...How do other members cope with Loves and Desires if there is no one to share those same loves and desires with..?..Sometimes I have this really stupid idea about putting a poster in my front window..."wanted friendly Female Dom"....I know I never will...but I can't help wondering what if..!....Does one live in Hope....or rely upon Fantasies..?..Cassie

[ey****]

really sorry to hear about your loss.

whilst there's never any garauntees, getting involved in your local kink scene is a good way to meet people : not necessarily instant relationships, but getting out and getting to know people might lead to wanting to share play.

Being near London you are utterly spoilt for choice - and if you're near Croydon you're near Subversion which is a fantastic club,  it also has some great house Mistresses.  

[Br****]

My partner is vanilla as f*** and won't let me play with others because for me domination needs a sexual component and hell will freeze over if I ever get to actually orgasm properly again! Boring sex and fuckin bullshit for me! Thank God he goes to work and I can get the f***ed up porn out or watch jigsaw for a while and wank because seriously it does drive you mental. I am very depressed without bdsm and I have no idea how I am going to survive. Mr Vanilla tries but fails miserably its like hitting your head against a wall. Fantasy is all I can get by on and it only goes so far . Cyber hug and I hope you find what you need. 

[TheReadingPuppy]

I've been looking for a partner for years. Don't think I'll ever find anyone

[ey****]

19 minutes ago, TheReadingPuppy said:

I've been looking for a partner for years. Don't think I'll ever find anyone

if you're looking and can't find... the question is where are you looking?  And, if you are going to the right places but failing to find someone, what are you doing to improve your chances?

[TheReadingPuppy]

I go to many events and was at one last night. I played with people but never find anyone single looking for a permanent sub

[Likeitall-1290]

I've been looking for someone to play with as well.  Have not found anyone serious yet.

[ey****]

yeah, it's sometimes easier to build up rapport for casual play rather than a D/s relationship.  It's also tricky to find a vanilla partner and introduce them to the concept of being your Mistress (although possible, but lots of challenges)

seems to be people in this thread wanting different things.  And there's a world of difference between a casual play partner (easier to find through activity) a Mistress for a D/s relationship and a partner who is also your Dominant/Mistress/etc.

The Mistresses I regularly serve are also served by other subs - and - have (or are looking for) their own romantic partners outside of D/s : and I think that's often an option.  (and I can think of some who did actually marry a sub, but that's a very rare breed) 

But, the more specific in what you're looking for the more difficult to find.

[TheReadingPuppy]

Just impossible to find a partner.  I'll be single forever because I don't want an ordinary vanilla girlfriend I want someone that's into D/s but there's nobody and just impossible to find anyone

[Joker50]

Sometimes it is when you stop looking that what you want hits you in the face... Offer up a prayer to whoever is listening, the lady will be enough and you may be surprised, no guarantees of course but I got a Bengal kitten come my way and all I did was wish. 

[Joker50]

On 02/02/2018 at 12:47 PM, Cassie34 said:

Being in that situation for a long time since losing my fiancee...How do other members cope with Loves and Desires if there is no one to share those same loves and desires with..?..Sometimes I have this really stupid idea about putting a poster in my front window..."wanted friendly Female Dom"....I know I never will...but I can't help wondering what if..!....Does one live in Hope....or rely upon Fantasies..?..Cassie

Sometimes fantasy is all we have... I want someone who likes her ass being spanked and seeing where that leads... after all when your ass is spanked there is nothing like a cuddle to help dry those tears. So yes I will spank as female ass so long as I can cuddle her afterwards... it can only get kinkier from there ... so maybe you need someone to spank your ass first....