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Slave training, please?

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Posted

Hi, everyone! 

Can anyone tell me how, and where, I can learn how to be a good, obedient slave who will submit itself to any punishment and obey every command from my owner? 

  • Like 1
Posted
After several months on dating sites wanting precisely that, I can only tell you that your only hope is to pay a professional
  • Like 2
subbbn
Posted
I think if you were owned by a mistress you would be on your way
Posted
Here is a good place to start & asking for advice & help. Reading the various topics on the forums. Reading up & the Internet. Attending local Munches to meet like minded folk or Fet clubs are fantastic for meeting people & gaining experience. You can either just have a drink or watch activities or often join in, you may also find people who will take you under their wing & guide you. As @Fimus has said you can also pay a professional Domme for sessions but make sure you study & find someone reputable. Don’t fall into the lap of someone looking for a quick buck saying ‘I’ll do it’ You can also hang around here in the background & see if you have genuine connection with someone but also make friends along the way
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Posted
Also maybe don’t say ‘submit itself to any punishment & obey every command’ Until you know exactly what it is you’re looking for as someone may come forward with some extreme ideas that are too much or outside your hard limits. Not everyone’s kinks suits us all so try & get a picture in your mind of the kind of thing you’re willing to submit to. For example I love pain but I wouldn’t want to be the subject of extreme exccesive body piercing during a play session .....just be a bit clear of a starting point for yourself
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Posted

BigPolly is absolutely correct. It may be a good idea to decide what your hard limits are and make sure they are clearly visible on your profile. If in doubt, do not rely on "that sounds good" - most fantasies rarely are as good as you expect in reality. Set "soft limits" for anything you have not tried, on the understanding that a dom will push those limits but will always be ready to stop if it is too much for you

  • Like 1
3SumQueen
Posted

I agree with others on the setting limits.
You might be up for anything but it's better to at least give people something to decide whether they'd be compatible with you or not. Like i'm into being pleased and some other stuff, so whoever wants to serve me would have to love those things i enjoy in particular.

What kind of things are you struggling with that mean you need to learn how to submit to someone? Maybe we could help with this.

Posted
15 minutes ago, 3SumQueen said:

I agree with others on the setting limits.
You might be up for anything but it's better to at least give people something to decide whether they'd be compatible with you or not. Like i'm into being pleased and some other stuff, so whoever wants to serve me would have to love those things i enjoy in particular.

What kind of things are you struggling with that mean you need to learn how to submit to someone? Maybe we could help with this.

Ohhh you like being pleased do you, where do I sign up lol

  • Like 1
3SumQueen
Posted
5 hours ago, Scouting4u said:

Ohhh you like being pleased do you, where do I sign up lol

I'm not looking for anyone right now but might be in the future. I'm definitely looking for new friends all the time as well.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, 3SumQueen said:

I agree with others on the setting limits.
You might be up for anything but it's better to at least give people something to decide whether they'd be compatible with you or not. Like i'm into being pleased and some other stuff, so whoever wants to serve me would have to love those things i enjoy in particular.

What kind of things are you struggling with that mean you need to learn how to submit to someone? Maybe we could help with this.

Thank you for replying. I’m struggling with stubbornness and not always knowing how to accept the rules of my mistress. It’s resulted in punishment in the past, under the category of extreme punishment, but I never understood how to improve as a slave. My former mistress was more like a bully who enjoyed inflicting pain rather than having an obedient slave. 

How can I Iearn obedience?

Edited by John863
Grammatical
3SumQueen
Posted
9 hours ago, John863 said:

Thank you for replying. I’m struggling with stubbornness and not always knowing how to accept the rules of my mistress. It’s resulted in punishment in the past, under the category of extreme punishment, but I never understood how to improve as a slave. My former mistress was more like a bully who enjoyed inflicting pain rather than having an obedient slave. 

How can I Iearn obedience?

You're welcome.

This might be where limits apply to you? Even if you feel an urge to submit to someone completely the limits could be in the way you do it. I see a lot of guys say they want a punishment that is pleasurable to them, i don't  pander to that personally because i feel like they will not comply with me to get what they want and enjoy, and so i've got to change their idea of punishment to it will be something they do not want and only if they are obedient they will get what they enjoy (rewarded for obedience) this can take a little manipulation but i'm highly observant and so it's easy for me to do...i think they want an enjoyable punishment because they feel shame around wanting what they crave and so see it as being 'naughty' or bad to want that, might not be true for everyone but this is the impression i get from a lot of people i've interacted with and so i try to change how they think because i believe i should get what i want too and not just have to punish someone and they're left happy  but then i'm being left unsatisfied. I also feel like they should be mentally happy about what they crave but i enjoy humiliating them too so can leave them feeling shamed if they get off on that.

Do you imagine a way where someone could get you to do what they wanted that means you'd be more willing to serve them and enjoy that? Do you think you actually do have limits now and there are some thing you definitely don't want to do or be put through? It's ok to have them even as a slave because i feel that compatibility with someone depends on limits.

  • Like 1
Posted

Thank you for Your kind advice. Actually, it turned out that I have some People who are interested now, and I found that there are some of them that I found creepy, and one of them (one) who I like talking to, because she won't talk to me like a freak just to get what she wants, but treats me like a human being instead. I Guess I'm being more used to havintg limits. 

Thank you for Your time^^ 

  • Like 1
3SumQueen
Posted

Nice to know. Hope things go well for you. :)

Posted

Thank you ^^ 

 

Posted
On 8/17/2018 at 4:46 AM, 3SumQueen said:

I'm not looking for anyone right now but might be in the future. I'm definitely looking for new friends all the time as well.

I'm more than happy to get to know you better xxx

  • Like 1
3SumQueen
Posted
11 hours ago, Scouting4u said:

I'm more than happy to get to know you better xxx

Well hello new friend, i'll drop you a PM. :)

Posted
3 hours ago, 3SumQueen said:

Well hello new friend, i'll drop you a PM. :)

New friend indeed and thank you xxx

3SumQueen
Posted
3 minutes ago, Scouting4u said:

New friend indeed and thank you xxx

It's a pleasure.

Posted

Oh no, the pleasure is all mine sexy lady, your most welcome gorgeous lady xx

  • Like 1
eyemblacksheep
Posted

the concept of 'slave/sub training' is very much fantasy based.   There's nothing wrong with that as such - but certainly...

If you meet someone at a munch or club and you get on and you're like "Hey, you're a Dominant - would you train me to be a/your slave" then the answer is likely to be no, because they are putting time and effort and emotion into your 'training' and at any time you can decide it's not for you or flick over to someone younger/prettier/whatever

Approaching a professional with this approach is still not actually guaranteed an acceptance - but if you're paying someone an hourly rate for your training then they're at least compensated for their time should you discover it's not for you or you'll take your new found skills else where

But in either case, everyone has different expectations - so there's no black and white.

Obedience is simple, you just do what you're told - but it's also a case of knowing when to question that.  Getting into a habit of doing random acts of kindness.  Look at other people's needs before your own.  Not in a ridiculous chivalry way and not in a human doormat way - but, y'know, help the person on the bus struggling with the pushchair - let the person behind you in the queue with 1 or 2 items go in front if you've a full trolley - Hell, take your empty glass back to the bar.   Just little things tot up....

  • Like 2
Posted

Thank you!! 

subbbn
Posted
On 8/16/2018 at 8:46 PM, 3SumQueen said:

I'm not looking for anyone right now but might be in the future. I'm definitely looking for new friends all the time as well.

but for fun would you like a cam slave queen

3SumQueen
Posted
1 hour ago, subbbn said:

but for fun would you like a cam slave queen

Not really but thanks for the offer.


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