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Dominants limits


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Posted

Hi I am curious to know if dominants have limits? From what I've read so far all the limits set in bdsm relationship are governed by the limits of the submissive and agreed with by the dominant I just wanted to know if I have that understanding correct.

Posted (edited)

Great point tink. From my experience yes we do and a great deal of damage can be done by a sub pushing for more than the D type is prepared to offer . In this lays the problem that most D types will push as far as the sub requires to there detriment . We all walk a narrow line and this, in a great deal of ways, is the attraction . We are human not machines .

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted
Great topic and Great response Some of these limits can even be the most basic things too Absolutely love the topic tink
Posted

Most certainly Dominants have limits, we are human after all. At the moment there seems to be a lot of emphasis on negotiatiating the subs limits and needs but it is important to remember that dominants have limits and needs too.

We have a great responsibility to protect our s type during play but we can not do this if we are pushing our own limits too far in order to give subs what they need. It is important to remember this when negotiating.

Posted
I’m of thinking Dom’s limits are what ever they set themselves at that moment! I like to think my limits would be ignored and pushed until a scream or whimper is heard! It’s a very good subject nevertheless...
Velvet_Tigress
Posted

Great question! Anything which turns my stomach is a limit. It's a safety issue- drowning you in vomit might cause 25 to life. ;-)

Posted

Yep I agree  - we have limits and mine are pretty consistent regardless of the sub

Posted

I think Dominants limits are less talked about because generally it's seen they are setting the scene or the arrangement.

But, of course Dominants have limits but in general it's just a case that they don't *do* whatever-it-is.  

Oooh... I get to talk about my Dominant side... well.... my limits are generally - anything I don't feel I can do safely... or anything I don't think will be fun.  What the latter means is very variable.  I usually only play with Ladies/F-presenting but there's exceptions that could be fun 

(guys - this doesn't mean fill my inbox up if you live half the world away.) 

Posted
9 hours ago, BRiii said:

I’m of thinking Dom’s limits are what ever they set themselves at that moment! I like to think my limits would be ignored and pushed until a scream or whimper is heard! It’s a very good subject nevertheless...

My limits are negotiated before the play begins and are never set in the moment.

lots of subs scream or whimper from the first strike but negotiated hard limits are never ignored. If you want to continue until you scream then add that to your negotiation but as a dominant I will stop before that if I think you have taken enough and serious damage could be caused. 

Posted

I was stabbing in the dark about the subject, I find it hard to depict how a Dom thinks and acts, seeing as I’m strongly sub sided, with regards to what I stated it was more for long term relationships where more in-depth mind play takes place, once I get to know somebody and gains trust I become more of the mind that’s I’m the sub and for my Mistress/Dom to assert what ever level possible being that they already know that I have limits to a certain degree but can and will be pushed! That kinda turns my brain on, the object of another’s sadist desires, in first off meetings and not knowing someone etc then yes limits are important, I do apologise I should have been more specific, I’m of habit in blurting things out!

Posted (edited)

My hard limits are non negotiable not open to push or bend to suit s types it's taken me a great deal of time and many mistakes and lessons by now means does this mean that I'm stuck in my ways after years you still grow.  I see starting out as a leaning curve and you always in some way pay for your education . I've in the past allowed my self in the heat of play over stepped and paid the cost . C

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted

I guess you set your own limits by finding someone submissive who has the same/similar limits as yourself, basically. I prefer to do it that way.

Posted
I had a mistress before who would refuse to do something herself she just didnt feel comfortable with it
  • 5 months later...
Posted

yes I would think we all have the same basic limits, for example anything illegal?? 

usually the sub ask during our connection what are my limits, which show some homework has been done from her part, otherwise I stated it myself. I dont do scat or child play for example. Until last year I didnt slap across the face but  since I tried it once its off my list and move into my fetish list ;)

Posted

Yes it is fairy common for the dominant to have limits, there are things that everyone is uncomfortable doing, like maybe making the submissive bleed. 

It is very important that both partners know each others limits, please make sure that you take care of that. 

  • 2 weeks later...
AlejandroOso
Posted

That's why BDSM partners should be even closer to each other than plain couples - no matter of the role they aquire in the play

  • 1 month later...
Toosoretosit
Posted

But where do you find a domme who has the same limits as you ?

On 9/29/2018 at 5:39 PM, 3SumQueen said:

I guess you set your own limits by finding someone submissive who has the same/similar limits as yourself, basically. I prefer to do it that way.

 

Posted
10 hours ago, Toosoretosit said:

But where do you find a domme who has the same limits as you ?

 

By getting to know people, eventually you'll find someone with the same who is also interested in you.

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