Affectionate, caring TPE & CNC

[DaddyHurtsBest]

I'm primarily a Daddy Dom, have been involved in the scene for about 12 years now, I've been fortunate enough to have tried almost everything Kink wise and found I enjoy it all. I guess I'm what you might call an extremophile, genuinely have almost no limits.

Dynamic wise I enjoy again the more extreme total power exchange/ Consenting non-consent/one sided element of a deep slavery dynamic and I have the people skills and emotional stability to be able to do it well. Getting piercings done (because the body is mine, they just inhabit it), real hard punishment, or sadistic sessions just because I enjoy it, whilst preserving health, beyond that their limits are what I choose them to be.

So far so kinky; find a total slave type that wants to be locked up in a dungeon and utterly controlled and owned.

 

Except, I also am highly affectionate, caring and romantic. I love having daddy/ little or owner/pet time, going on dates (okay, I'm liable to make kinky trouble on them but still...), And really looking after my little/pet's health. I'll encourage them to have and spend time with their own friends doing their own hobbies, make them feel special, loved and happy. I'll talk things through with them, listen to their concerns and encourage them to say what's on their mind (in the right time and place).

But on my terms, under my control, with my decision being final, after I've heard them.

Physically owning someone's body, and having no qualms about doing -anything- beyond lasting damage to it.

Mentally being dominant, totally in control, but listening and encouraging them to be honest and open. Though final decision is mine. No arguing back once made, disagree but commit.

Emotionally being actually more in favour of them, using all of my strength and experience to support, guide, and be there for in every possible way, as well as actively coaching to be healthier and happier. Though I would of course expect this to be reciprocated and for them to actively want to support and love back too, but honestly I am so low maintenance I really don't need much. 

 

I know this is a bit of a ramble, but even I struggle to fully wrap my head around it sometimes. In my experience people generally only want a bit of one side but predominantly the other, either as a slave without affection, love and romance, or as an affectionate sub but with autonomy, limits and a level of control,

Is it too difficult to do? 

Are the two sides mutually exclusive? 

Can it even be done in a healthy way? (This part I'm 100% confident on it can if I'm honest ..)

Does being -that- level of submissive/slave/degradee almost require a mindset/emotional state that precludes any romantic, supportive relationship?

 

I've almost never found anyone who feels this way or wants something similar so I would LOVE to hear your stories and thoughts on the subject! I feel like it should be possible, but maybe those who have had something similar in the past could prove me wrong. 

Converse!

Edited March 7, 2019 by DaddyHurtsBest
Typo

[LittleLyd]

Wow. First of all you sounds incredible. I do believe that you can find both it’s just difficult to find anyone sort of into the same thing as you. And have the same morals and standards. I was in a Dom/sub, daddy/little, master/slave, sir/pet.. relationship for six years so I know it can work. But thank you for letting us in to your world it’s nice to know there’s people out there who have the same opinions as me. ❤️

[Mi****]

I believe it is definitely possible. However finding someone who wants this amount of control is much harder as the pool of choice is much smaller than those who require more say in the relationship

[Deleted Member]

There are some people who want a relationship that becomes totally ddependant on their partner. I would suggest a small minority of kinksters fall into this catagory.

The majority seem to require the maintenance of some level of personal choice and a lot of those have no interest in a 24/7 experience.

I think you are fishing in a fairly small pond.

[DaddyHurtsBest]

1 hour ago, MissTillysue said:

However finding someone who wants this amount of control is much harder as the pool of choice is much smaller

Interestingly I've had no problems at all finding people who want that level of control, that's actually not all too hard I've found, or at least close enough to it. The challenge is matching that with the second half

40 minutes ago, Littlefellow said:

The majority seem to require the maintenance of some level of personal choice and a lot of those have no interest in a 24/7 experience

Someone else having final say, doesn't mean you don't have personal choice or levels of autonomy. It's just given within a framework set by the other person. And because someone chooses to do so, should not necessarily mean they are dependent. In fact, the whole point of the second half of my post was asking people's thoughts on having that level of physical control, but being emotionally supportive and caring, building a sub's confidence and independence, so as they can continue to -choose- to submit because of what they gain from it, not through *** and whether that juxtaposition is possible or not, or if that kind of dynamic requires a sub to be dependent.

[Deleted Member]

If somebody else has the final say on something then you don't have freedom. You are operating within a set of rules. The rules might be liberal but they are rules. This has nothing to do with a person being depandent. Society has rules so at some level everybody follows the rules.

[Mi****]

18 minutes ago, DaddyHurtsBest said:

Interestingly I've had no problems at all finding people who want that level of control, that's actually not all too hard I've found, or at least close enough to it. The challenge is matching that with the second half

I would have thought that if the first half (TPE & CNC) had been agreed then the second half is also agreed within the parameters of that agreement

[DaddyHurtsBest]

Now that's an interesting point, one could simply order the sub to be affectionate etc ... I'm not sure how effective that would be, and goes a little bit full circle of if they knew that to begin with, would it be the kind of dynamic they'd want anyway. You're not wrong that one could simply command it though.

Honestly I've never tried that before, does anyone have any experience with something similar?

[Mi****]

28 minutes ago, DaddyHurtsBest said:

Now that's an interesting point, one could simply order the sub to be affectionate etc ... I'm not sure how effective that would be, and goes a little bit full circle of if they knew that to begin with, would it be the kind of dynamic they'd want anyway. You're not wrong that one could simply command it though.

Honestly I've never tried that before, does anyone have any experience with something similar?

I have honestly never met anyone who didnt want at least some form of affection with the relationship so I have no experience of having to command it

[Deleted Member]

On 3/7/2019 at 5:25 PM, DaddyHurtsBest said:

Can it even be done in a healthy way? (This part I'm 100% confident on it can if I'm honest ..)

 

Wow ok by the look of your ad you sound a bit greedy.

100% healthy way is a hard one unless you know the sub for a long time and very well, hardest with the slave and even more with the maso ones. When do you discover they actually used you for their self *** 

Edited March 10, 2019 by Deleted Member
Misspelling