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Posted

Any other good online dating sites for kinksters?

Posted

remember folks - it's OK to mention but no external links

Posted
6 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

there's a lot of reviews of other sites available in the magazine, here :

https://www.fetish.com/community/magazine/kinky-dating-site-reviews/

 

One thing I'd say - good or bad, it's often about what you put in to the results out - and nothing is a substitute for going outdoors.

How does one meet kinksters though besides going to munches 

Posted
It's difficult you're looking for a niche within a niche! Seriously munches are good. You can literally say to the organisers after you are known not to be a serial killer - know anyone I should ask out?. I'm not saying a matchmaking service but friends of friends can be helpful! Somehow someone lovely reached out to me on a type of umbrella (VU), but I think I was lucky! whippler (spelled different) looks snazzy but I've had about 2 dommes a day tell me to be their slave, -no actual exchange of much chat with people. I've found OKC to have a comprehensive questions section and actually matches with kinky people. Just put 'into kink' or something in your profile really casually... Here's a bit hit and miss too - a lot of people aren't active it seems.
Posted
10 hours ago, Lonelyvirgin said:

How does one meet kinksters though besides going to munches 

at the risk of sounding, well...

I mean, you never know - you could meet someone at work, in the pub, at supermarket and they happen to be kinky.  But, everything you seek in people narrows down a pool.    What you know when you go to a munch, a fetish club, an event, a dungeon, etc. is that everyone there is kinky or curious about kink and while this comes with no certainty. No guarantees.  You at least have people you know you can at least discuss kinks with

Posted (edited)

Thank-you for the advice. I live at home, so it makes it hard to go to the play parties. I am not even sure if play parties are for me. I think I prefer something more intimate. However, I do feel jealous and left out as I feel it helps strengthen the groups bond more. 

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted

yeah, it gets difficult because - well, everything isn't for everyone.   I went to a play party earlier this year where I didn't *actually* know anyone there (apart from the organiser as it happens) and I was open to play but not looking so I just people watched and had a good time - but, had I gone expecting or hoping for play it might have been a wasted journey (though, it was an event with house Dommes so there were a couple of people I could have approached without worry.) 

And, yeah, meeting up with people helps strengthen the bond.  It's just a case of weighing up what you ultimately want and which steps would move in the right direction to get it.   

Posted (edited)
55 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

yeah, it gets difficult because - well, everything isn't for everyone.   I went to a play party earlier this year where I didn't *actually* know anyone there (apart from the organiser as it happens) and I was open to play but not looking so I just people watched and had a good time - but, had I gone expecting or hoping for play it might have been a wasted journey (though, it was an event with house Dommes so there were a couple of people I could have approached without worry.) 

And, yeah, meeting up with people helps strengthen the bond.  It's just a case of weighing up what you ultimately want and which steps would move in the right direction to get it.   

That’s the thing. I know what I want, but I don’t know how to get it. It’s why I turned to online dating. There are several sites out there, but lots of them want you to pay even though they say they are free, but you can’t do anything on those sites unless you pay. I would like to keep going to the munches, but in the past, they alluded to events that went on in these play parties and it made me feel left out and sad. Sad that these people can get what they want and I can’t. 

Edited by Deleted Member
Posted
11 hours ago, Lonelyvirgin said:

 There are several sites out there, but lots of them want you to pay even though they say they are free, but you can’t do anything on those sites unless you pay

Unfortunately, there's not really such a thing as free - that, among anything else, the sites need to cover their own expenses.   So, hence there's usually a restricted 'free' and a premium.

11 hours ago, Lonelyvirgin said:

I would like to keep going to the munches, but in the past, they alluded to events that went on in these play parties and it made me feel left out and sad

there's two different types of events and parties.  well, arguably three.

the public ones are ones which pretty much anyone can go to, you buy a ticket or pay on the door and you can attend.

at these, of course, there may be possibility you do end up meeting someone and having some form of play - it's not guaranteed.  Many events do have house staff who are kinda there to help and for play - but, it's best to approach politely and not from a position of expectancy/entitlement. 

private ones are usually held at somebody's house so obviously they want people they know - or people that can be vouched for, and unfortunately the best way to do this is to become known by being regular at munches or generally known.  I'll be honest, as fun as house parties are they often aren't quite what is sometimes bigged up to be.  I don't want to be too cynical and I've had fun of sorts at house parties - but there are those who often use them as a boast to make them seem cooler / more interesting than they actually are.

So, while I do fully understand and appreciate feeling left out, been there myself; you're not quite missing out and will probably appreciate them more once you do have a knit of people happy enough to invite.

the third time of event I don't know how predominate are around you - but in the UK there are Pro-Dommes who host dungeon parties - usually limited numbers and work out cheaper than a Pro-Domme session and guaranteed play for the length of the party.

11 hours ago, Lonelyvirgin said:

Sad that these people can get what they want and I can’t. 

whilst that can be sad - you don't know their stories.

I've just had a really busy an active month - I've done as much this month as in the year previous.  Which on one side goes "wow, you had a great May" but on another it's been a lot of... well... nothing for pretty much a year.

Posted
4 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

Unfortunately, there's not really such a thing as free - that, among anything else, the sites need to cover their own expenses.   So, hence there's usually a restricted 'free' and a premium.

there's two different types of events and parties.  well, arguably three.

the public ones are ones which pretty much anyone can go to, you buy a ticket or pay on the door and you can attend.

at these, of course, there may be possibility you do end up meeting someone and having some form of play - it's not guaranteed.  Many events do have house staff who are kinda there to help and for play - but, it's best to approach politely and not from a position of expectancy/entitlement. 

private ones are usually held at somebody's house so obviously they want people they know - or people that can be vouched for, and unfortunately the best way to do this is to become known by being regular at munches or generally known.  I'll be honest, as fun as house parties are they often aren't quite what is sometimes bigged up to be.  I don't want to be too cynical and I've had fun of sorts at house parties - but there are those who often use them as a boast to make them seem cooler / more interesting than they actually are.

So, while I do fully understand and appreciate feeling left out, been there myself; you're not quite missing out and will probably appreciate them more once you do have a knit of people happy enough to invite.

the third time of event I don't know how predominate are around you - but in the UK there are Pro-Dommes who host dungeon parties - usually limited numbers and work out cheaper than a Pro-Domme session and guaranteed play for the length of the party.

whilst that can be sad - you don't know their stories.

I've just had a really busy an active month - I've done as much this month as in the year previous.  Which on one side goes "wow, you had a great May" but on another it's been a lot of... well... nothing for pretty much a year.

Where I live there is only one type and you need a sponsor. Sponsorships are dicey for me because of my current living situation, and going to play parties is also dicey for me. Even if I wanted to go, I am not sure if I would be able to go.

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