Well, I am switch and I prefer to find a female with similar orientation. I prefer long term, monogamous relationship which would possibly lead to a marriage. I prefer sadism & masochism more than dominace & submisivity. I am bold enough to see myself as an attractive person, both physical appearence and inner qualities and I am expecting my partner being similar. I often say that "inner beauty shines out". I prefer fit, athletic & sporty woman. In the case you have been "sleeping" and so you gained "few extra pounds" the only answer accepted would be "Yes, I am going to get back to shape, for you / for us!"