From someone that was in an abusive D/s relationship I can tell you that if you're questioning if it's abuse then it probably is. By questioning how he is treating you, you're making yourself aware of the fact that this isn't consensual. If he can't treat you with the respect you deserve not only Read more… as a sub and a partner but as a human being then I'm sorry to say he doesn't deserve you. No one should be driven to the point of suicide, that's not what any dynamic or relationship should be about and that is nothing more than bullying. You are giving him this amazing gift and he needs to recognise that. I think PatientTraveller had it right, you need to leave and find someone who respects what you're giving him x