Can polyaffective connections stay platonic?

[Ku****]

I go to AA, Theres usually 2 tables, one has people my age, theres usually at least 1 attractive female, and the other usually has older guys in their 60s. I go there to learn and grow, so i sit with the older cats to avoid distraction. Ive heard stories of sponsors smashing their sponsored, I've also found the statement that "a shoulder to cry on is a boner to ride on" to be pretty true. Am I effed up for completely avoiding the other table and shutting those females out completely? About a week ago one of the ladies came up to me to say hi and I got a huge hard-on while we were talking. There was no way to hide it, in fact, i had no idea i had one for the longest time.. Im pretty sure most of the people there saw it.🤦🏻 I dont want to ruin it because i love the people there and it's such a wonderful environment. Am I wrong for thinking that 2 people who would be attracted to each other, who bond on a deeper level, can't stay platonic?

[Deleted Member]

Shouldn't be trying to form romantic/sexual relationships at AA.
Having acknowledged that, perhaps adjusting your clothing until and if you are more aware of your bodily function.

What you think about whether or not YOU can be physically attracted to someone and it not be an issue for YOU being friends with them is ENTIRELY UP TO YOU!!! [And the other party(ies) involved.]

If YOU don't think YOU can remain platonic with someone, then you can't. Adjusting that mindset seems in order. 🤷

[Deleted Member]

Go to a mens meeting. Easy solution. Two dead batteries won’t start a car. Don’t expect romance at an AA meeting.

[Th****]

1. Talk to your sponsor about it
2. Only go to stag meetings for now

[Ne****]

side note but i’d recommend not using the word “females” the way you are; they’re women.

[pr****]

You have to protect your sobriety! Also everything has a time and place and AA meetings are neither for romance. If you start dating someone from your meeting and it doesn't work out there's a very good chance it will also ruin your sobriety. Protect your sobriety!

[al****]

6 hours ago, prairie-creek236943 said:

You have to protect your sobriety! Also everything has a time and place and AA meetings are neither for romance. If you start dating someone from your meeting and it doesn't work out there's a very good chance it will also ruin your sobriety. Protect your sobriety!

And their sobriety as well.

[Deleted Member]

Give it to her

[Br****]

I do think that two people can stay platonic if it's what you both want. I don't however think it's a good place to pick up a platonic partner. Focus on you while you're there. 💚