Subtiger59 Posted October 20, 2021 My potential dom and I do not live in the same city. He leaves quite the mark or maybe I bruise easily. How do I go about engaging in play with other doms or more importantly vanilla partners if I am covered in bruises? It feels wrong to let another partner/dom see what another did to me without being called into question.
qu**** Posted October 20, 2021 Honesty is the best policy here, if with another Dom make it clear you are involved with a potential Dom, and your play includes leaving you bruised, the majority will understand this, vanilla can be more tricky but still you should tell them of your situation, here it's probably more a case of some will some won't understand or just won't want to be involved, just be clear it's something you enjoy and are into
ey**** Posted October 20, 2021 There's options depending on what is most important for you 1) Ask the Dom not to bruise you 2) Don't plan anything with others while you are bruised 3) Let others know you are bruised and why and don't plan anything with them if it's a problem for them ---- I've used a mix depending on context - for example if I've got a few film dates in a short space of time.
Deleted Member Posted October 20, 2021 4 hours ago, Submit_To_Me said: He bruises you because he doesn't want you playing with others. If so then there is a major communication issue in the dynamic - can also lead to very toxic/abusive behaviour. I truly hope it’s nothing of the sort. As for your comment I would advise to be open and honest both with other dons and potential(s) : - define if bruising is part of play and dynamic and ask yourself if you are comfortable with that if not then you should speak up abt it - tell other play partners about this - information is key - as for vanilla partners it can be tricky but either you tell them about the situation and explain how you/them fit into this or plan on not seeing them while you are bruised if it bothers them. Good luck 👍🏾
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