Personal Ads

[Cruxdom]

Has anyone here posted an ad and gotten a genuine response?? I don't think females respond to ads placed by male. My guess is the only people who get responses are posted by women. I hope I am wrong but I've never heard of anyone getting a response to a personal ad. I welcome your comments. I sincerely hope I'm completely wrong about this!

[Nylon-Nellie]

Ditto, I have not had one reply to mine. Depends on who is looking and what for.

[MasterScorpio]

Site is infested with women looking for *** that will move to be with you but need *** for the gas or their Dom has abandoned them without food I even had one ask me for account information so her Dom could send me *** and told me her Dom was Bernie Sanders

[Wiseonthree]

I’ve gotten ...2 messages without one. Both pay-to-play Dommes. Site seems like a great place to chat which is what I am here for. but unsure if there is that drive here. I got 1 message on a post once; that person stopped talking after I asked her about her kinks.

[The_Gambler]

Dear Crux, u r right, never got a response and I also agree with the other comments, this site is getting overrun by ***hunting „women“.

[Qu****]

Hi Cruxy

I actually responded to an ad not long after joining site nearly 3 years ago. Turned out to be the start of my journey into BDSM as he became my first Dom, so don’t give up hope! 😘

[ey****]

I used to have an ad up.  Didn't get any replies.

However, this could be any reason from my ad not quite being good enough to not being what people were looking for.   I've found more success without an ad, with passive connections. 

[Shellshock]

Never ever had a reply on here and only ever met 4 people on here . 

And 3 of them was going to be just friends 

[qu****]

It's probably the same as any site, more men than women, as for member search why list people who were active more than two months ago

[Deleted Member]

Nope, it's a total waste of time

[qu****]

Once my boss where I worked said try saying this is your own the business, up your income, etc, I borrowed up to date fashion clothes, had a proper photo taken, put profile up on a "normal" site, and an anything goes site, nothing from either till someone on the "dirty" site messaged after 6 weeks, she said don't care about all that show me your cock, 1 normal 1 skin pulled back, I did this, we met following day and it was well, most enjoyable 😂 all be it the only response

[Deleted Member]

I don’t understand the concept of an ad and why I’d want to reply to one? I’ve always had them turned off. It’s at odds with the way human relationships work.

[He****]

Can't say I've seen many ads haven't been here long. Not after *** I've got my own. I like taking to people. I'm not new to kink but I'm not experienced in everything either. I found there's a lot of guys who pretend they're Dom's or daddy's and they haven't got a clue what that actually is. If I'm going to trust myself in the hands of someone I want to know they know what the fuck they're doing. Cause you can get hurt. So that would be why I wouldn't probably reply to one. 

[qu****]

Plus the other thing here is you receive far more views from males than females

[69specials]

I have never placed an ad as never felt the need to do so,I am an active member & I feel that I get to know people via the chat facilities & in that way can gage more with people on abit of a personal level & I enjoy that so good luck with the personal ads & I wish you to find what your after.

[Deleted Member]

Loads after  pay to  play  and Lot of women    want 200 pound  if  you  want *** surely  give something  in  return

[qu****]

I feel the ads are more aimed at specifics rather than in general, but I dare say there'll be some they work for, but yes 69specials, it seems chatrooms are more conducive for possible meets

[Deleted Member]

I have had a couple replies but by women demanding ***

[Ar****]

I suspect there is a psychological aspect with at least three prongs as to why women are not inclined to reply to personal ads.

For a start, when you see an ad from somebody looking for attention of any kind, whilst there are sincere reasons for it and good matches can be found this way (see Queenie63 above), there is a reflex question some people may ask of "Why is this person having to place an ad? What is wrong with them that they have been unable to find a partner through other means?". I would hope that most people are not that judgemental, but I believe that is an undeniable *** element. It can sometimes be misconstrued as desperation, and that is never attractive.

 

Secondly, if we do like a personal ad, we might think about all the other potentials replying to it. The follow-on thoughts can have many implications. What would make the advertiser be interested in me rather than anybody else? If they are interested in a dozen people who reply, how do we know they aren't going to try it on with all twelve, juggle us around, play us off against each other? Do I really want to have to compete with others as though I'm going for a job interview?

 

Third, and I think this is really important, is the laziness factor. By posting an ad you invite people to come to you, hopefully because you have sold yourself in an appealing manner. But many people would prefer to be approached directly by you instead. They want to feel special, unique, that you have made an effort for them. They don't want the onus on them - you should be seeking them out if you are interested, then explaining why they caught your eye.

 

Of course, it really isn't that simple is it? Just as what I have written above is the case for many, I'm certain there are also plenty of people who prefer to look directly at ads instead of trawl profiles. I don't think that detracts from the impersonality of an ad though, and I think that is what I am driving at.

 

As others have mentioned already in this thread, people like to talk. People like to get to know people in a more organic fashion and let things happen naturally. There are generally differences in how the male and female brains approach these things, but no rules are hard and fast. Ultimately though, I think that is what it comes down to.

[Deleted Member]

Isn't it better to be more proactive; read profiles written by females, then you write creatively, spontaneously, in reaction, to see if they're potentially interested in you by what you say? Otherwise, you're just sitting around waiting, expecting females to come to you. In days gone by, a woman used to expect to be approached by a guy who showed interest. That's still true, even in the modern World...it's called chivalry, the courteous behaviour of men towards women. Women like the chase, to be admired, be the centre of a male's attention...his focus. You don't get a reward, if you don't put the effort in in the first place. Reap what you sow, and make it appropriate, honest and different, every single time. Then, and only then, might you enjoy what you really seek.

[Deleted Member]

Hels1920's comments speak volumes. Perfect example of what's running through a female mind.

[ey****]

the other kinda elephant in the room sometimes

a lot of personal ads are pretty poor. 

[qu****]

If you take "normal" dating sites as an example it's about 1 reply per 80 messages ( God knows who did the statistics), I know once I looked through my activity history on a site, in 8 weeks I'd viewed 245 profiles, messaged 72, a normal hi, loving your profile kind of thing, received 2 replies, 1 automated saying no thanks, and another saying all men are bastards, I also found 38 had blocked me for no apparent reason lol

[ey****]

there's a good chance that messaging 72 is a good way to get blocked by around half of them ;) 

[Deleted Member]

hmmmm when I first joined the site, I posted an ad.  I was hoping to find someone local.  I don't know if it was the wording of my ad or what but I got a lot of Doms who wanted to just get right into it. 

As a woman, I only was looking for ads from people near me and sadly they were almost nil.  So I have never responded.