Anticipation or torture

[Deleted Member]

As a sub, doms can do things that they perceive as anticipation, but the sub reads as torture. I'm interested to know, from doms and subs alike, what experiences you have with this, and how was it resolved.
Thank you, in anticipation x

[SirPaul]

That’s in interesting view.
So petite, is it really torture, as in so awful you never ever want to do it again and is even painful to think about it?

[Cheekysub247]

Ive had conversation about ideas, theres a certain idea/thought has now been planted but never done, and i do think about it if it would ever happen, maybe its 'mental torture'

[Koby]

Context is important....

 

Is the particular behaviour or activity, positive or negative?

For example, making your partner wait for a text reply can rightly be seen as torture/abuse......but framed as anticipation by the Dom.

[Deleted Member]

This is for a sub to answer, I guess. But if I want to mentally torture a sub, I'll tell them to get the kit/gear laid out ready and include items I know worry her.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, DoubleyTroubley said:

This is for a sub to answer, I guess. But if I want to mentally torture a sub, I'll tell them to get the kit/gear laid out ready and include items I know worry her.

Is the mental torture agreed beforehand, as part of play, or do you decide that as a dom/master?

[Deleted Member]

"Is the mental torture agreed beforehand, as part of play, or do you decide that as a dom/master?"

I would decide. After all, I'm "implying" only, I'm overstepping no boundaries or hard/soft limits. I'd clearly only do this too after many, many sessions.

[ki****]

I guess it’s about the time and how long a person perceives is to long to be anticipation and then becomes to much. If a Dom keeps promising or teasing to do something and then it doesn’t happen is that anticipation or time wasting ? From personal experience it’s a fine line and being kept hanging on to long with one person has now demised some of the excitement for future anticipation to work from others.

[Matttster]

As with nearly everything in kink, everything is different to different people and different dynamics. What one Dom views as “anticipation” may be just that for one sub, but for another it could be torture. Everyone comes from different backgrounds and we all have different dna/chemicals/spirits/whatever that causes us to perceive things uniquely.

If it is intended as anticipation by the Dom and is more of torture by the sun, then the sun should talk to their Dom about it (perhaps after the event). For any relationship to be successful, there must be communication between the parties in the relationship.

Hopefully, in a case like this, once the Dom understands the subs perception, they will change their behavior. The may use their “anticipation” in the future for a true punishment.