Respect/Hygiene/Toys

[Du****]

Question for Doms/Subs...

I feel it's disrespectful of me to subject my subs to used toys, even though they are properly cleaned, but I have a fairly expensive taste in toys. Luckily, I'm loyal to a sub when I have one, so don't need to replace them often.
But is it common to reuse toys with other partners?

[Ch****]

Its up to choice....there are things i do use that belong to others, condoms can be put on insertables/vibes, restraints i would share.
I wouldnt share gags or hoods.
I have my own set of stuff thats just for me, then judge what the other person has if i can use it safely.
Dungeons dont give fresh sets of stuff for each new booking, im sure they have strict cleaning policy.
I personally dont see an issue in sharing whats possible to share 😊

[DeviantInside]

Ok... I don't think there is a black and white answer to this (as with most things). For the most part I would say it would be unrealistic to expect new toys to be bought for every new partner (not to mention expensive), providing they are properly sterilised/cleaned etc. However it may also depend on what the toys are and how the sub in question feels about it. Some may feel uncomfortable with or not like the idea of toys having been used with other people, and this could be for many reasons. This also doesnt just apply to insertables etc. for example collars can have significance to people above and beyond a play collar.

I think the key, as in so much with all of this, is honest communication to understand what each others views and expectations are as to what the other feels is acceptable etc.

[ge****]

I guess it depends what you mean by "disrespectful" and also may depend on the type of toy.
.
If you mean disrespectful from the perspective of cleanliness and hygiene then it's not uncommon, and in fact is recommended by sexual health clinics, to use condoms on "insertable" toys or those that come into close contact.
.
If you mean disrespectful from the more moral perspective of using them on multiple partners then I guess that's an individual thing - though unless you're made of *** buying a new set of toys for every partner is not entirely practical and so may simply come down to a judgement call we all have to make.
.
I guess another way of looking at it is if you've had more than one partner, is it disrespectful to subject a new partner to your body given it is "used", even though it's properly cleaned? Of course it's not, so why would it be any different with toys? Unless of course the toy had special significance to you and a previous partner.

[Pl****]

First of all, depends on the toys. I imagine fewer people would have a problem reusing a spreader bar compared to a dildo. Some toys can be sanitized more easily than others, and there are things people might use depending on the toy to safely use them with multiple partners, such as putting condoms on vibrators.

I've never really dealt with this, but I suspect most people are okay with sharing toys to the extent it can be done safely and they trust the owners to do so, but some people have reservations or might struggle to trust whether safety can be achieved.

I haven't heard of anybody objecting because it's disrespectful. Do you feel any obligation to replace your hands or sex organs between partners (assuming they are as used as your toys)?

Edited April 25, 2022 by Pleasurecalculus
spelling

[Deleted Member]

I studied contamination, disinfection and the laws in school. There's a proper procedure to disinfection... step by step. Sorry to say, alot of people do it "Their Way", do it Cheap, or Both!! I have seen staffs in many doctor's office breaking the rules. If he can afford to buy me toys great, but I can buy my own. Most times, I wish I never learned it!🙈

[TheBookCollector]

The only things i dont reuse are floggers made from leather as they cant be cleaned of bodily fluid.

Anything made from metal, plastic or silicone cand be easily cleaned in hotwater with an antibatcterial soap, or in a dishwasher and put in a clean zip lock bag and wiped with an anti bacterial wipe before using.

[Deleted Member]

@TheBookCollector... please excuse me, but dishwasher?. In school, we talked about people who use the dishwasher. Again, I understand this is your way.

[TheBookCollector]

I know people who use a dishwasher for their toys especially metal and silicone ones. I dont use a diskwasher myself, but do use hotwater and antibacterial soap.

What is your objection to using a dishwasher?

[ey****]

if you have a toy you don't wish to use with someone else, say, after a relationship ends.  Then, don't.  But, you may as well give that toy to the person you used it on than keep it and not use it

from a hygiene perspective most can be used on multiple partners providing cleaned thoroughly - an exception as mentioned above is floggers : once a flogger draws *** it shouldn't be used on anyone else.

Equally once a cane splinters that shouldn't be used on anyone else. 

[Deleted Member]

@TheBookCollector..."Using the dishwasher" would bring a different discussion, so... everybody has their ways, including me. My way is what I learned in school. Like, I said I wish I never learned this, because it can be a *** in the butt.🙈

[ge****]

1 hour ago, TheBookCollector said:

I know people who use a dishwasher for their toys especially metal and silicone ones. I dont use a diskwasher myself, but do use hotwater and antibacterial soap.

What is your objection to using a dishwasher?

Always makes me grin when I hear of people using their dishwasher - not because there's anything wrong with doing so, in fact it makes perfect sense, but because years ago there was a sitcom (on C5 I think it was) centred on a brothel where they had a dishwasher whose only purpose was for cleaning toys and was always full of them 😄

[ag****]

It’s all about communication…
Show your respect by
knowing their expectations of Cleanliness/Hygiene.
Definitely not an area to assume 🤓
Like above mentioned…
condoms work on all types of junk 🤠

[TheBookCollector]

@kiseu sorry i thought you had a general dislike for using a dishwasher or that there was a specific reason not to use one.

[Du****]

4 hours ago, gemini_man said:

I guess it depends what you mean by "disrespectful" and also may depend on the type of toy.
.
If you mean disrespectful from the perspective of cleanliness and hygiene then it's not uncommon, and in fact is recommended by sexual health clinics, to use condoms on "insertable" toys or those that come into close contact.
.
If you mean disrespectful from the more moral perspective of using them on multiple partners then I guess that's an individual thing - though unless you're made of *** buying a new set of toys for every partner is not entirely practical and so may simply come down to a judgement call we all have to make.
.
I guess another way of looking at it is if you've had more than one partner, is it disrespectful to subject a new partner to your body given it is "used", even though it's properly cleaned? Of course it's not, so why would it be any different with toys? Unless of course the toy had special significance to you and a previous partner.

I'm loyal to a sub when I have one. It doesn't turn me on if the connection is temporary or fake.

My question is purely from a moral & financial perspective.

But you've answered my question. For me personally, when I find a sub, they are special to me, and I should treat them as such.

[Du****]

3 hours ago, TheBookCollector said:

The only things i dont reuse are floggers made from leather as they cant be cleaned of bodily fluid.

Anything made from metal, plastic or silicone cand be easily cleaned in hotwater with an antibatcterial soap, or in a dishwasher and put in a clean zip lock bag and wiped with an anti bacterial wipe before using.

A dishwasher wouldn't work for me... After dinner, it's dessert, so I'd want to use both the toys AND the dishwasher.😆

[Deleted Member]

As a, sub I don't see, any issue with this so long as everything is thoroughly cleaned. After all either party might decide not to play again, you can hardly re-equip that often. It's nice that you consider this though 😊

[gr****]

That really depends on the toys for me and how they have been cared for.

[Deleted Member]

I feel the same, I always gift new toys to new partners and let them hold onto them as their personal items

[Deleted Member]

Depends on the toy I would think. I use condoms on my dildos when used on partners even though I clean them. Non-penetrative toys I think would be fine for reuse so long as they didn't make contact with ***.

[sm****]

I have/had various floggers once used i never use on another person so some specialty ones I will only introduce once i think something is going to last.  Basically as they are next to impossible to sanitise to a safe enough standard without destroying them.

The same for rattan canes, i really stopped using them 15 years back.

One reason i rely heavily on solid metal "stainless Steel" restraints and rigid manacles etc, they are easy to sterilise.

Any insertable's i will always use a condom with, for their safety as well as easier to clean up.

But essential before i use any toy and will communicate with whoever i am going to play with what their views/feelins/limits are and if they are uncertain or i am that eqiipment will never be used on that said person.

 

[Ki****]

I would absolutely never reuse a toy with a second partner. As much as people think they know how to sterilize, they just don’t. I had one dom surprise me with an insertable, condom covered, but I still got the most heinous ***ful staph infection in my vulva that lasted a month. It was horrific and he was read the riot act on blindfold “surprises” and used toys. 

I really can’t think of a toy that I’d use that wasn’t inserted, had zero potential for ***, or was easily sterilized. I know I’m extra cautious but I’d never want to go through what I did again, or be responsible for someone else experiencing that. It’s just not worth it. 
 

Aside from safety, I’d like to know a toy wasn’t used on someone else. I don’t want to be thinking about previous partners when I’m with my current one. I know gear can get expensive, but you might be surprised the kink gear you can get at the home improvement or dollar store. 
 

It’s always a huge turn off to me when I see pictures of people’s toy collections. I think either they want to use dirty things on me, or they sure have a ton of unused equipment. I know I’m not in the norm here, but I feel like I should be. Used toys? Ewwww.  

[Deleted Member]

32 minutes ago, Kitanya said:

I would absolutely never reuse a toy with a second partner. As much as people think they know how to sterilize, they just don’t. I had one dom surprise me with an insertable, condom covered, but I still got the most heinous ***ful staph infection in my vulva that lasted a month. It was horrific and he was read the riot act on blindfold “surprises” and used toys. 

I really can’t think of a toy that I’d use that wasn’t inserted, had zero potential for ***, or was easily sterilized. I know I’m extra cautious but I’d never want to go through what I did again, or be responsible for someone else experiencing that. It’s just not worth it. 
 

Aside from safety, I’d like to know a toy wasn’t used on someone else. I don’t want to be thinking about previous partners when I’m with my current one. I know gear can get expensive, but you might be surprised the kink gear you can get at the home improvement or dollar store. 
 

It’s always a huge turn off to me when I see pictures of people’s toy collections. I think either they want to use dirty things on me, or they sure have a ton of unused equipment. I know I’m not in the norm here, but I feel like I should be. Used toys? Ewwww.  

I am the same too!! You are right about alot of people thinking they "know". I got an infection from a man who should know "how to wash his hands". Alot of people think we are over cautious, but if they got a nasty infection from  "supposedly clean" toys or hands, I am sure they will change their mind too! Anybody reading this comment, make sure they really wash their hands. An infection is possible with hands that was not correctly washed!!

[Ki****]

On 9/20/2022 at 5:16 AM, kiseu said:

I am the same too!! You are right about alot of people thinking they "know". I got an infection from a man who should know "how to wash his hands". Alot of people think we are over cautious, but if they got a nasty infection from  "supposedly clean" toys or hands, I am sure they will change their mind too! Anybody reading this comment, make sure they really wash their hands. An infection is possible with hands that was not correctly washed!!

Kiseu, I’m so sorry that happened to you. Hugs. 

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Kitanya said:

Kiseu, I’m so sorry that happened to you. Hugs. 

Thank you, and appreciate your empathy.💖