Dealing with need of physical touch, neediness and loneliness being single

[Deleted Member]

Hi, everyone

I'm a little, and never had a Daddy, and for years I have been feeling this way, lonely, needing so badly physical touch (embraces, hair pets), comforting words, and just the need to be loved this way.

Does anyone have advice on how to try and deal with this?

thanks a lot in advance

[Do****]

I'm sure there are many Daddies that feel exactly as you do. I read your profile with great interest, posting this may well be a turning point in your search. If you find a suitable applicant I am sure it would be a beautiful future for you both.

[Hal727]

Frankly, having read over your profile prior to commenting, I’m surprised that you’re having such a difficult time. You are attractive, clearly intelligent, and well spoken. Just my opinion, but it seems to me that you should be in great demand. Perhaps all you need is a bit more patience, because some lucky guy is going to stumble upon you, and realize that he’s found a jewel. Good luck to you. May you find exactly what you’re seeking!

[GreyHog]

Take a big step and reach out to someone who fits what you want. Soft dom daddies or mommies can give you the comfort you need, and allow you to explore your impulses. I would advise starting non-sexual and grow from there. Good luck in your journey.

[Ch****]

I don't want to sound uncaring but this place I found will amplify those feelings. Try having an unusual fetish and it's crickets out here. And if you do get someone contact you the chances are they are looking just for a hook up and have nothing to do with kink at all. Lately I have backed away from here and it's made me feel a lot better, I'm even considering leaving for good

[Do****]

China I see on your profile that you have a good friend, from my interactions here, I have found some very empathetic people. Sorry you feel that way, not everybody is looking to hook up.

[Ch****]

2 minutes ago, DopeyDom said:

China I see on your profile that you have a good friend, from my interactions here, I have found some very empathetic people. Sorry you feel that way, not everybody is looking to hook up.

They may be on my list doesn't mean we interact at all. I've been here 5 years so to make 3 friends in 5 years I would say highlights my point even more

[Do****]

Chiana, Firstly I apologise for the spelling, secondly I have been around for many years and can count good friends easily as it is a short list. Good friends don't judge, but are there when you need them, sometimes we don't reach out enough.

[Deleted Member]

Maybe you need to try giving people a chance. If they mess up - just block them. Be careful dismissing people on the basis of age and appearance. That’s not all there is to a person. Older guys want friends too, but I know now I won’t find them here.

[Deleted Member]

I’m relatively new here, and likely older than a lot of you. Dealing with loneliness and absence of human touch - and looking for an elusive relationship is a lot - especially with the holidays upon us.

May I suggest taking the long road - to get to the place you want to be? Since “vanilla” is such a larger pool of potential mates, why not focus your attention there. Find yourself a comfortable vanilla relationship and early in that relationship, steer towards the kind of relationship you want it to be.

It’s been my experience from being in vanilla relationships that we eventually evolved into kink, that most men are very compliant and willing to give the woman they care for what she wants in the bedroom and in their personal life. Find your man, and if you want a daddy figure who is older, focus on older men. When you find him and intimacy begins, tell him what would make you happy and why you feel that way.

Be honest and be upfront as soon as intimacy between you two begins. Most older men would prefer to have a relationship with a younger woman, even if she’s only just a few years younger. And most men would jump at the chance to have a relationship with a woman who’s looking for a daddy figure - it’s an exciting and *** dynamic. So find that vanilla guy and just open up to him. I can’t fathom how you could fail with that strategy.

[Hal727]

28 minutes ago, SFswitch said:

I’m relatively new here, and likely older than a lot of you. Dealing with loneliness and absence of human touch - and looking for an elusive relationship is a lot - especially with the holidays upon us.

May I suggest taking the long road - to get to the place you want to be? Since “vanilla” is such a larger pool of potential mates, why not focus your attention there. Find yourself a comfortable vanilla relationship and early in that relationship, steer towards the kind of relationship you want it to be.

It’s been my experience from being in vanilla relationships that we eventually evolved into kink, that most men are very compliant and willing to give the woman they care for what she wants in the bedroom and in their personal life. Find your man, and if you want a daddy figure who is older, focus on older men. When you find him and intimacy begins, tell him what would make you happy and why you feel that way.

Be honest and be upfront as soon as intimacy between you two begins. Most older men would prefer to have a relationship with a younger woman, even if she’s only just a few years younger. And most men would jump at the chance to have a relationship with a woman who’s looking for a daddy figure - it’s an exciting and *** dynamic. So find that vanilla guy and just open up to him. I can’t fathom how you could fail with that strategy.

That is really excellent advice. I’m an old guy. My first wife passed away many years ago, and I was single for 15 years, mostly raising our two kids and working. However, after a few years I got on a vanilla dating site and over time met some really nice ladies. I’m married to one of them now, and have some great memories of others I met there. Also worth mentioning is that I never ran into a scammer the entire time I used the site.

[St****]

Well written and thank you for posting.

[Deleted Member]

On 11/22/2023 at 7:47 PM, SFswitch said:

I’m relatively new here, and likely older than a lot of you. Dealing with loneliness and absence of human touch - and looking for an elusive relationship is a lot - especially with the holidays upon us.

May I suggest taking the long road - to get to the place you want to be? Since “vanilla” is such a larger pool of potential mates, why not focus your attention there. Find yourself a comfortable vanilla relationship and early in that relationship, steer towards the kind of relationship you want it to be.

It’s been my experience from being in vanilla relationships that we eventually evolved into kink, that most men are very compliant and willing to give the woman they care for what she wants in the bedroom and in their personal life. Find your man, and if you want a daddy figure who is older, focus on older men. When you find him and intimacy begins, tell him what would make you happy and why you feel that way.

Be honest and be upfront as soon as intimacy between you two begins. Most older men would prefer to have a relationship with a younger woman, even if she’s only just a few years younger. And most men would jump at the chance to have a relationship with a woman who’s looking for a daddy figure - it’s an exciting and *** dynamic. So find that vanilla guy and just open up to him. I can’t fathom how you could fail with that strategy.

Thank you a lot for your insight, I've been trying this, meeting guys this way, so hopefully the right man will come along, I really appreciate your reply, hope the best for you

Edited November 25, 2023 by Deleted Member
typo

[Deleted Member]

On 11/23/2023 at 10:37 AM, Storyteller05 said:

Well written and thank you for posting.

Thank you for your reply🙏

[Deleted Member]

On 11/22/2023 at 1:21 PM, Alexkid said:

Maybe you need to try giving people a chance. If they mess up - just block them. Be careful dismissing people on the basis of age and appearance. That’s not all there is to a person. Older guys want friends too, but I know now I won’t find them here.

Thanks a lot for your comment/remark, I tend not to judge a person based on physical appearance or age (I actually almost always feel attracted towards guys older than me) but rather I focus on his personality, and yes, I agree with what you say, about wanting friends too, no matter the age

[Deleted Member]

I think you should trust your judgement. I don’t think you’re going to hurt many people purposely. It sounds like you’re behaving quite reasonably towards others. I think most people in their lives have such feelings to different degrees.

Most adults or people would have built a sort of radar which determines who they will and will not trust - as I expect you have by now. It is something that should never be fixed but changes from your life experiences and also what you observe. Or you ask people you trust to share their experiences or thoughts with you.

Move as slow as you want, but if it’s too slow for a suitor, you can drop your suitor. But, you know there are people who will tell you untruths and use you.
Sometimes it’s hard to figure out. Try and build a good radar, if unsure ask for advice from those close to you or trusted sources. Just try and be careful in your choices.

But the time comes when you will choose. You may already have heard from those of fet, here in these comments, who will help with advice on all stages of making a choice. Try talking privately to some of these people, ask for advice or their feedback. Try them out. I’ve seen good advice given by many people on here who care a great deal about total strangers.

[Deleted Member]

I’m having a similar issue. Very physically ***ful sometimes to feel so untouched. And while I see a lot of comments on how to find a partner (which for whatever reason just isnt that easy) I don’t see any practical advice on how to deal with the feels in the meantime. So, these are the things I’ve been doing that have helped me- talk to yourself out loud, call yourself pet names that you like to hear.. I have to say “it’s time to get up baby girl” every morning. Give yourself rewards/treats in an intentional way rather than impulsive. Get a massage subscription or take time for self massage/breathing exercises to alleviate some of the physiological stresses of loneliness (and get real person hugs wherever possible in your life) If praise/dirty talk is a big thing- try apps like Quinn or Dipseas. Heated pillows are great for cuddles. Pet sitting can help with loneliness if you like ***s but don’t have your own, or volunteering at rescues. Hope these help you with your current situation until you find your daddy 💜

[Deleted Member]

Try taking filters off and talk to those trying just to talk with you. A filter is blocking me talking to you.

[Do****]

Alexkid Hi I have tried to reach out to offer support on a few occasions also. It is understandable why people feel the need to use the filters, especially those who have had multiple experiences of vulgar and inappropriate messaging. It can be frustrating but one must respect an individual's choice. I guess we have hard skins at our age and somebody blocking me after seeing a message I sent wouldn't concern me. I realise the need I feel sometimes to comfort, I think that also comes with age. Having raised a family my paternal instincts kick in and I feel I must try to help. We can only help when allowed to do so. I'll keep trying where and when I can. You should too, I think.

[Do****]

JulieWinters: That was great advice you gave and could only have come from somebody who truly understands the OPs situation.

[Deleted Member]

Yes I agree with what you say, I just thought others might try to give support directly, but may be prevented from doing so like I was. It was just a suggestion - maybe even a poor one in the circumstances. Thanks

[St****]

There is a definite fine line between holding out for you and settling and it's a battle that gets faced easily

[Deleted Member]

For me I had to get comfortable in my own skin. I had to get comfortable being alone. I had to stop seeking external validation and validate myself. I had to learn to love myself. I’m alone but I’m never lonely having someone or people in my life is a want not a need. The things I want are things I can give to myself. I haven’t been in a relationship in 9 years. I’ve never had a solid Dom or Daddy in my life. I know my worth and what I bring to the table. Yes being single isn’t always easy for me, wanting a relationship is a driving *** in my life. I won’t settle for less than I deserve. I won’t stay where I don’t feel valued. I am the only constant thing in my life, I read somewhere I came into this world alone and I will leave this world alone. I find solace in being alone, I value peace. Every day I’m working on better myself to be the best version of myself. I train other people how to love me. Relationships, people, feelings, situations they’re all temporary. One day I’ll find what I’m looking for, and if I don’t that’s ok too. I love myself, I love being alone with myself and I enjoy what I have in my life now.