Should a male sub pay for everything?

[Deleted Member]

So I recently started chatting with a female dom and we arranged to meet and go to a private dungeon for a day. She booked i paid her the cost. She then wanted toys for occasion. She ordered, I paid. I am fine with that. However she has been asking for *** to go out with friends, get nails done, for takeaways etc. And not small amounts. Because I've said no they have now cancelled our meeting 5 hours before. Should a sub be expected to pay out £100s for a dom to do stuff that does not involve them? Is this person trying to *** their power as a dom over a sub? Or am I being unreasonable not giving her the ***? Would be interested to hear experienced doms and subs view

[Ar****]

You've been scammed fella. There never was a dungeon.

[CanberraTeddy]

Well done for saying no; there is pay pigs out there for that! I think it reasonable
That you paid for dungeon and toys but outside of that I would be hesitant! Sounds like it’s more of a paid service then a relationship

[Ja****]

Sounds to me like your being used .

[Deleted Member]

It all depends on what was negotiated and consented to before hand. Pay pigs are a certain type of male sub that get off on giving their *** away. 

Everything should be talked about before and not just assumed. Every female dominant is different and is into different things.

[wo****]

Was she from this site

[Deleted Member]

Hey there.

No, she is just using you to get what she can out of you. I classify myself as a Dom but I find it a double standard that most male Doms don’t try to drain their subs of ***. This seems mostly to be a female trait.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a generous person, but I don’t accept that I should subsidise the life of an adult woman. Women who expect this of men are of no appeal to me at all. If you are going to be in a relationship with someone, then like them for them, not what they can give you.

I appreciate that you’re a sub my friend, but have some more self respect and don’t let a woman like this drain your bank account.

Just keep looking for the right woman, who doesn’t expect everything from you like this. She’s not really interested in you, just your ***.

Take care and keep us all updated.

[Deleted Member]

Yes you’re being used for ***. If that’s not your idea of being used find another dom

[na****]

No you are not supposed to. This is illegal. It is financial ***. Even those willing called *** slave, it is illegal.
I am a sub I know it is hard but we have to put our limits even if they restrain by a lot the people we match

[RyanGlen]

Dom/Sub relationship are equal. You shouldn't need to pay for everything.

[Su****]

You got scammed

[He****]

You've been used my guy.
If you guys were using toys, having sex already and you guys know each other and there was trust between you give then maybe maybe give her friend *** for.

[DL****]

Hate to say it buddy but am leaning towards agreeing with @Aranhis.. have been in a very similar spot previously, as a sub male we are “easier prey” for these scammers unfortunately, it’s hard to tell the difference between manipulation and genuine domination especially when you’re in the midst of it all.

Am here if you wanna reach out for a chat bud 💪🏼

[Is****]

Yes bud out side dung and toys everything else is extra

[Th****]

I know the more prominent doms / Dommes especially international ones, accept and expect contributions in various forms as appreciation.

But the subs get to choose volume and what . It’s not unusual. It all depends what you want and need

[Deleted Member]

Errr maybe look for a different dom hun. Preferably one that doesn't treat you like a ATM.

[St****]

its simple she's a findom and expects you to support her financially

[Deleted Member]

22 minutes ago, wolverhampton264 said:

Was she from this site

Yes she was.

[FETMOD-TF]

Just now, fatboy1978 said:

Yes she was.

Please report the member via the report function as no form of financial solicitation is permitted here at FET as per the terms of use. 

[Li****]

No, you're being taken advantage of.

[Tropicale61]

Findom does not have limit you will pay all the time. Find someone else and fix your limit too.

[ma****]

Most of the female doms/mistresses aren’t actual doms. They’re just women who want *** without sometimes saying it. That’s it.

[Ag****]

Probably she is not looking for a sub, but for a sugar daddy (and she tried to turn you into a one). That's why it's important to talk about expectations before go out. You both were expecting different things from each other.

[Ne****]

No.

[Deleted Member]

22 minutes ago, TheGoodGirl_ said:

I know the more prominent doms / Dommes especially international ones, accept and expect contributions in various forms as appreciation.

But the subs get to choose volume and what . It’s not unusual. It all depends what you want and need

Within reason and if discussed in initial stages I get it. The odd treat here and there for appreciation is fine. This was not that. Nothing was discussed it was just assumed by them I would pay up. Lesson now learnt