BDSM Education

[OB****]

I want to know how you learned about BDSM. Did you learn online, did you read books? I also want to know if you were mentored, and were you mentored by the same side of the slash (Dom mentoring Dom, sub mentoring sub). Tell us the method of your learning journey.

[Deleted Member]

I met a divorcee who was the daughter of a Gorean and was totally trained to accept severe *** in silence.  That was over 30 years ago and I was hooked.

[Th****]

I'd mostly read about it in bizarre magazines. Then I found out one of the girls I worked with was a domme and she invited me along to a fettish night she had a hand in. But it's only the last 6 yrs that I've taken an interest in it.

[Av****]

Read online before my first D/s

[my****]

When I was very young I stumbled on it somehow online and thought it was an easy way to get laid. 

I was very wrong, and the more I learned, the more picky I became about who I wanted to spend time with. Today I pass on more opportunities than I take. So few measure up.

[fiend_13]

There was no t'internet when I discovered BDSM. As a ***ager there were just snippets in films and other mainstream media and illustrated adverts in the yellow pages for shops selling products. This was enough to fascinate me. But spent my early years of exploration believing D/s was only experienced by sub males and Domme females. This changed when in my late twenties I was employed as security in a dungeon. I began a relationship with one of the pro-Dommes and as she was a switch outside of the work place she introduced me to life on the D side of the slash. It turned out I had always been topping from the bottom anyway during my formative years as "sub". I was much more comfortable as a Dominant. Helping out in the dungeon and attending events then getting access to the Internet and sites such as Informed Consent all helped in my progress of shifting away from bottom and switch and embracing being Dominant.

[ey****]

I think I had taken an interest via stuff like film/TV/music - and did actually start to go to fetish events before really learning - so, a lot became a bit... ooh, that looks like fun - and I think there were a few folk there knew I was a bit young and new and kid-in-sweet-shop so watched out for me a bit 

I did do some learning via sites at the time, but early 2000s a lot of info was a little sparse, and most places I had internet access was locked down for anything remotely adult (though, a few sites totally slipped the net) but, you know what. I think retrospectively the limited info meant a lot came across "this is how it is"

I went away for a bit (first marriage, and divorce) and coming back into stuff there were a lot more resources and different opinions and viewpoints.  A wealth of resource on line to learn from, and I also found going to munches - in addition to fetish nights - became a massive boost for learning cos talking to folk at social events does a lot for growth and learning and understanding what works for others.

Regardless. The learning process is still far from complete.

[I_****]

I guess I was lucky in that the internet was around when I was wanting to learn. Before that I just experimented on myself. The internet helped me find books and other resources. I was also lucky in that I had a couple of partners who were up for trying things out. I tried out a bunch of different roles and learned all I could - I'm still learning and also unlearning what I thought was true in the beginning.

[Pe****]

Online, books, and experimenting with my girlfriend before I turned 19.
When I was 19, I was a switch and found a lovely professional dominatrix who was delighted to mentor me. Covered all the important things like philosophy, respect, technique, safety, aftercare, and a wide range of impact implements. The stunt bottom went on to become a good friend as well. Continued learning through in person classes, books, and online. Shibari, needles, fire, violet wand, tens unit, hypnosis. There is always something new to learn about and most of them are wonderful to try.

[Li****]

Go to the porn convention