Persistence of societal taboo and shaming in non-traditional sexual behavior and preferences

[Ha****]

There’s going to be an egregious amount of data and discussion behind this thread eventually. However, Rome was not built in a day so I will suffice to create the thread tonight before striving for continual citation, expansion, and elaboration. Namely, in the face of staggering humanitarian, personal, and human rights advancements over the last century, sexual preferences and behaviors have still remained marginalized and under attack. I truly believe that liberating sexual behaviors and preferences may very well be one of the next leading areas of human rights, hopefully this thread can usher as an anthropological discourse with an eventual goal of removing negative cultural reactions to protected personal preferences.

[FETMod-HG]

This topic has been approved for discussion and educational purposes.  However any comments which are political or bashing/shaming of others will not be permitted, as per our Code of Conduct / Terms or Use.

[Bo****]

What specific sexual behaviours and preferences require liberation and need - in your view - to be explored for protection as human rights?

[wh****]

This is a very slippery slope which we can already see in society today. We can see where people have pushed that boundary into areas that are destructive to society as a whole. Sexuality is not something that needs to be in the public for all to see. Yes, we all have exhibitionist fantasy, but to advocate ALL sexual activity or taboos be out in public or to be in the for front of "rights" can get real dicey real quick. Just keep it in the bedroom and leave kids alone. I say that, cause THISE types of folks will try to pry themselves into that conversation where they should not be.

[cl****]

When given a platform to express non-traditional sexual behavior and preferences most of you guys screw it up by sending some of that crazy stuff you guys send in messages. You simply can just say hello and act like you know how to be a gentleman

[TravellingDom71]

I am happy and content as a human being. I know i have sexual proclivities that not everyone would agree with but I am happy in the fact that I can share them with like minded people on sites like this and find sexual partners with reciprocal kinks and fetishes to have great sex with. I dont however feel the need to broadcast this or inflict it on the vanilla world. If that is what you are suggesting I would encourage you to begin your campaign with a long hard look in mirror and think long and hard about what you are trying to achieve.

[Deleted Member]

Which personal preferences are protected? Protected by what, precisely?

[Deleted Member]

Why was my comment removed please?

[ey****]

I feel you need to be more specific

Like there's a lot of words; without actually saying anything.  Like, give an example of something you would like to see changed? What do you feel is under attack?

 

[FETMOD-TF]

19 minutes ago, fififufu said:

Why was my comment removed please?

Your comment was not removed, it was just waiting in a queue to be reviewed by a moderator. All content in the Kink Academy forum must be reviewed prior to going live to ensure content remains safe for work as per play store requirements.

[Deleted Member]

Just now, FETMOD-TF said:

Your comment was not removed, it was just waiting in a queue to be reviewed by a moderator. All content in the Kink Academy forum must be reviewed prior to going live to ensure content remains safe for work as per play store requirements.

I'm sorry I got that wrong. Thanks for the reply.

[it****]

Treading dangerous territory with this topic

[Ki****]

This might not be popular opinion but I will say it anyway. I see people talking about taboos a lot without directly mentioning what and I automatically assume they are talking about things that are rightfully frowned upon. Some things should stay taboo and illegal. If we allow things like doing things with minors, incest, things involving ***s, public nudity and *** of consent then we will have failed as the human race.

[ey****]

To echo others also. I'll be honest when I see "taboo" my initial reaction is one of suspicion

because 

at it's most extreme it's used as code for (rightfully) illegal/banned practices - especially popular in those interested in minors

at the next level down; often stuff that maybe isn't so far - but is against the TOS of the site.  Which again means it's coded to try to work around topics which aren't permitted (for whatever reason)

below that, of course, there are a whole bunch of stuff which is stuff like DD/lg, age regression, fantasies as if someone was a family member though are not.    Which if it IS something like that - there's no reason not to name the kink/activity.

Below that again, of course some could consider a lot within kink is considered 'taboo' by wider society even if it's common place within kink.  Which - again - has no reason not to discuss openly on a fetish board. 

 

[Di****]

I think first everyone needs to realize the word “taboo” is subjective. That word means something different to me than it likely does to others.

My definition of taboo is anything that mainstream society judges or frowns down upon. The scope of what that would be is HUGE.

According to my definition everyone on this site would be engaging in taboo fantasies, behaviors, and lifestyles.

What I think (hope) the OP was trying to say is this. It is so common place in our society to kink shame. Humans are judgy by default. Humans all have subjective view points as to what’s right or wrong.

There are plenty of people out there that think *** is disgusting and wrong. Does that make them correct? It doesn’t. Fill in the blank with the link and the same can be said.

Sex is still very taboo in itself. The very nature of it is behind closed doors and a secret usually between two people.

Combine all those things and the OP is correct. Sex should be a liberated to be a proper topic that can be fought for in the correct ways in the right situations.

Clearly there are things that go beyond the word kink and into the word predator. I also think those predator behaviors are pretty clearly defined and recognized.

[Pu****]

I love taboo. As long as the two people are of age and both parties want to, go for it and enjoy and keep doing it

[ey****]

9 hours ago, DidSheSaidBananas said:

I think first everyone needs to realize the word “taboo” is subjective. That word means something different to me than it likely does to others.

It is - which I think is sometimes why there has to be a little more clarity on what the other person means

Are we talking sex outside of wedlock? Or...?

[kn****]

I'd certainly agree that there's a stigmatized reaction to dom/sub relationships. It's inherently misogynistic (Male dom) for most people who don't understand and initially believe that it's a form of *** (well it is at some level, but the fun kind). They believe it's mental ***. They don't understand that a) both parties are willing participants in their roles and b) that there's more to it than just sex and submission. It's not a porn movie 24/7. There's a lot of responsibility that comes with taking on a submissive and vice versa. Those who I've been able to convince to have an open mind and then spend a half hour or so explaining the dynamic and doing q&a after they absorb what the totality of the experience is usually end up coming around but it takes some serious effort. The most difficult thing to shed is the *** misconception of it. Even when the person you're explaining it to like a good spanking from time to time it's hard to convince them that subordinate behavior can be healthy.

[kn****]

I don't advertise my preference for kink by waiving a big banner around about it but I'm certainly not shy about talking about it either. And for me, in the serious relationships I've been in, it's a nice to have and not a need to have. I think it's still that way, but idk if I have another serious relationship in me - hopefully that will change and I'll report back on my findings if it does.

[ja****]

I'm just tired of how even in this supposedly sex positive Forward thinking Everyone let their Freak flag fly Fetish Bdsm and Kink Sub communities men seeking Sexual gratification is still vilified

[Be****]

No, all us freaks need to stay in the dark. Stop perverting the open worlds like the degenerate liberals you are.

[Bo****]

10 hours ago, jaxboro58399 said:

I'm just tired of how even in this supposedly sex positive Forward thinking Everyone let their Freak flag fly Fetish Bdsm and Kink Sub communities men seeking Sexual gratification is still vilified

I vilify those who prioritise their needs over that of others and cause harm. If consent and ethics can't be applied when exploring your sexuality, then you deserve to be vilified. If it happens that men - as you claim - are the target audience for said vilification, there's a reason for it. I often get inappropriate messages coming in hot to my inbox. I don't even have the opportunity to consent or not. I'm exempting in life examples due to the severity of what actually happens out in the world. Just because someone enjoys kink and sex, doesn't mean they enjoy it with everyone. No one has a blanket right to anyone else's body. Two - or more - parties need to enthusiastically come to the table and communicate. I suggest pulling your lens back and exploring this from other perspectives other than your own. All the best

[Ki****]

11 hours ago, jaxboro58399 said:

I'm just tired of how even in this supposedly sex positive Forward thinking Everyone let their Freak flag fly Fetish Bdsm and Kink Sub communities men seeking Sexual gratification is still vilified

Men aren't villified for wanting needing gratification. The problem is when they treat women like objects and act entitled to sex. I think the problem lies in two things. First, most men present themselves in a way that make it sound like they just want a warm body to use as a sex toy without giving anything in return and make it clear that they will not see partners as human beings they want to get to know or have any interest in. Second, most women aren't looking to be used and they have to be careful who they connect with, especially in communities like this where they risk things like abduction and falling to other mischief.

[Sl****]

EXACTLY!! F*ck on FL I made it EXTREMELY clear I'm a Lesbian. Here as well. Doesn't mean I don't STILL get Masculine Men sliding into my DMs trying to Flirt with me!!

For f*cks sake, had a Muscular Masculine dude ask if I was going to a Meetup, and as his First Message to me a Stranger said, "Because you would look sk good sitting on my lap!!"For many we're NOT people, we're Living Fleshlights.
Women grow up in America where WE are told to Avoid Getting SA BEFORE we're Adults. Yet Men are taught that they CANNOT Control their Lusts, as Boys. Girls are taught to Cover Up, Boys are NOT taught to Look Away.
We hear Horror Stories of Men NOT taking No for an Answer. Of NOT accepting a Woman is a Lesbian.
Women are taught from a young age that Men are DANGEROUS and SHOULD be Afraid. Let's not forget, MOST of us are SA by Family, Dates, Friends, etc. The people we KNOW, and NOT Strangers. Meanwhile for men it's in Prison.

[Sl****]

I'm NOT trying to say ALL MEN are Evil Villains. I'm explaining how Women are Socialized as Underaged Girls in American Society at least. There's some great men like Keanu Reeves and Pedro Pascal. Shit Pedro could say he loves Rope Bondage and women would line up around the block.
There 100% are Non-Immoral Fetishes that are Taboo in the Kink Scene and frowned upon, like when someone said Age Play. Like if you showed up to a Bar in Rope Bondage vs ABDL Onesie, can you really say people would react equally, even in a Kink Meetup?