5 Ways to Look Incredible in Plus Size Fetish Wear

We all know that big is beautiful. So, regardless of your body shape or size, if you find the right fetish wear that fits, you'll look hot, kinky and irresistible. Abi Brown explores the joys of plus size BDSM and fetish clothing: follow her tips and get the gear to drive your partners gaga!

As a plus size kinkster, for many years I thought that meant that fetish wear was not for me. I wore the same things to kink events that I wore to goth clubs and looked damn good (!), but I always felt like I was missing out on something.

Over time, I've managed to build up a collection of tips, tricks and gorgeous BDSM garments that mean I don't just look hot at play parties – I also look kinky. Thankfully, the fetish community is a broad church where body shaming is generally frowned down; it is generally body-positive and fat acceptance (and appreciation!) is commonplace.

So, here are my tips on how to look incredible in plus size fetish wear... and let them have it!

1. Plus-size fetish wear: comfort is key

There's more than one way to wear leather and latex. If you don't feel comfortable in entirely skintight and form-fitting garments, you don't have to wear them. Instead, look out for inky garments that cut in ways that you already know suit you.

A kinky corset is a sexy from of plus size fetish clothing

For example, plenty of outlets that sell plus size fetish wear have options for dresses with A-line skirts and sweetheart necklines, for example – and that's a shape that looks good on everyone.

You could also try long skirts made of traditional fetish fabrics paired with a top made of something else. Remember that materials like these are not the be-all and end-all of fetish wear. Sheer fabrics are incredibly flattering and sexy as a form of plus size BDSM clothing. For example, a floor-length chemise gown made of lace or a material so light it's practically transparent looks terrific over the right underwear.

“Traditional fetish fabrics are not the be-all and end-all of fetish wear. Sheer fabrics are incredibly flattering and sexy as a form of plus size BDSM clothing.”

Remember: plus size BDSM clothing is not a mysterious, uncharted new frontier. You probably already have a decent idea of what you look and feel good in, so you can translate that knowledge pretty well into the fetish gear area with a little effort.

2. High heels and proper stockings

If you get underwear right, you don't necessarily need a lot else! My standard play party attire is a 1950s-style bra, matching high-waisted knickers, a six-strap suspender belt, and stockings. On top of it all, I usually wear some sort of low-cut, floor-length sheer black chemise with a high-thigh split.

Finish this plus size fetish wear look with winged eyeliner, red lipstick, and a pair of devastatingly sexy high heels, and I look pretty incredible, even if I do so say so myself!

If you can find them, plus size fetish stockings are a huge boon – you look a hundred times better once the tops aren't cutting into your thighs and trying to roll down. When choosing a suspender belt, ensure you get one with at least six straps – the standard four-strap ones are rubbish, especially for plus size women. Finally, always go for metal clips over plastic ones, as they grip better and won't come undone as the night wears on.

Luscious lace: incorporate it into plus size fetish gear

3. Choose the right bra and avoid thongs

We all know by now how important it is to get a bra that fits properly – but you should also look for ones with wide-back bands. These are way more comfortable, have a more classic look, and are generally a great deal more flattering for anyone who feels self-conscious.

“Avoid thongs with plus size BDSM clothing unless you happen to love them. They're uncomfortable and unflattering.”

Avoid thongs with plus size BDSM clothing unless you happen to love them. They're uncomfortable, dreadfully unflattering, and I don't find them anywhere near as sexy as a more retro full-brief style. Most people also feel a lot more confident in sheer fabrics and exposed underwear if they know they can keep some parts of their anatomy covered up for as long as they want – something a thong doesn't allow.

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4. Consider the whole look

Road-testing a kinky plus size fetish or bondage outfit before an event can sometimes be disheartening. However, that's not necessarily because you don't look fantastic in what you've chosen – it's because you're not getting the whole picture.

Indeed, you can't accurately tell what you'll look like in plus size BDSM clothing until you've done your hair and make-up, put on your jewellery, and chosen the right pair of shoes. Don't let an unfinished look put you off the kinky plus size fetish gear you want to wear!

Surrender to suspenders! A perfect addition to plus size BDSM clothing

5. Confidence is key

You'll have heard this before, but it's accurate enough to bear repeating. Looking fabulous isn't about what dress size you wear, how tall you are, or how carefully you've honed your make-up skills. If you step into a room knowing that you look and feel incredible in your fetish wear, everyone around you will instinctively agree with you.

Posture makes a big difference in how flattering an outfit is. You'll always look better standing up straight with your shoulders back than if you're slumped and hunched over – this is true whether you're wearing jeans and a t-shirt, a shiny latex dress.... or absolutely nothing at all!

The final FET: plus size fetish clothing

Big is beautiful, and – as you will know – there are many admirers of plus size ***ps. However, us larger folk may have had our confidence knocked in the past and have some insecurities about wearing kinky plus size gear. But, follow my tips above to feel better and sexy. Above all, confidence is key! •

Abi Brown is a freelance writer and general pen-for-hire devoted to sexual deviancy and wearing too much jewellrey.

Where are your favourite outlets for plus-size BDSM clothing? Do you have other tips for finding the perfect outfit, no matter your size? Share your thoughts below...