Navigating the lifestyle among mixed company

[Fi****]

We are new to the lifestyle. Not a lot of experience. I am straight and the wife is bi-sexual. We are at this time interested in playing with other women. However, I am curious about how to navigate the lifestyle without letting your kids, outside family, and co-workers knowing. We don't even have our actual location listed here. Thankfully a person who sorta knew us from several degrees of separation blocked us.

Do you play with people in your area especially if you live in a place where almost everyone knows everyone? Or do you plan out of town trips? Any suggestions?

[an****]

That is a very hard question to answer. When I was married, the people that came into the bedroom were all known to us one way or another. Kids never knew better since it never happened at home. It was always a hush hush thing and very few friends knew what was happening. The only ones were the ones doing the same thing.
For you both just do what you feel is right for you both and deff keep your kids in the dark about it. If you choose to open up to friends make sure you’re both accepting of that choice and any fallback from it.

[Sq****]

This lifestyle doesn't require being a swinger. Telling you how to navigate any of this without your kids finding out is significantly above anyone else's paygrade. If you struggle at that flashpoint I highly advise you to rethink many things.

[Ma****]

I would say if you are trying to keep it under the covers then don’t play with others in your backyard. It is easier if you live in a large metro area like DFW to travel 20-30 min and not really have to worry about running into people you might know. If you’re in a smaller town and everyone knows everyone then plan your playtime for out of town nights and weekends with play partners not from your area. It might mean few opportunities to play but at least you’re minimizing the risk of discovery.

[Ta****]

Well, with a photo of your faces out there it makes it easy for family and other people to stumble upon your profile.
This is why I'm faceless on the internet and don't look in my nearest surroundings, but some towns over. If I'm writing with someone, I have his place, name, photo and can be sure it's not someone I know through work, which could harm me. A decent photo of bodyparts, just the silhouette or sth is common among all those who don't want their offspring's friends to now, or gossipy co-workers.
"The lifestyle" is what you decide to do, how open you want to be.
My friends know what I'm doing - co-workers, neighbours, family as I am a private person.

[7m****]

if you don't care about what people think, because that situation is bound to have a word or two get out about it, in a tight nit area. if you can handle the kickback from God, each other, kids, neighbors, community, employers, CPS etc... because those are all fucked up valid options in this day and age. Otherwise I would get the lust itch out of yas but quick. because being in *** or deceit, lying, hiding, about the lifestyle over a long period of time isn't good for anybody. I would find your best choice getaway out of town once a month and telling no one is the only way to hide it.

[ey****]

8 hours ago, FionaNChuck8381 said:

I am curious about how to navigate the lifestyle without letting your kids, outside family, and co-workers knowing

Don't tell them.

 

But like, the thing is.... if you do end up going to events, be it swing, fetish, munches, whatever.  If you do happen to see anyone you know... they're there for the same reason and also have a mutual interest in discretion and privacy.

Whilst also there can be the temptation to going to things slightly further away... honestly, I've bumped into more unexpected people away from home than closer to home - kinda cos they also had the same idea to play out-of-town. 

[Sl****]

All of your kids, relatives friends and coworkers don’t need to know but the nosy adults typically speculate. I live in Baltimore and have been playing some. My ex lives nearby, is bi and has a partner. She’s a social butterfly and that will do a great job at masking any relationship. Living in a liberal area also helps with a bit less of a chance of judgment.
You’ll naturally find play time to explore each other. Only you know your dynamic. It takes patience but it’s also important to express the kind of communication with your kids. Bring up subtle things with your kids as you go about with everyday life. Introduce things like 🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍⚧️ as teaching moments which can open the door about the lifestyle. Speak of inclusion and personal preferences. My kid is 12 and is well aware of so much without knowing too much. Kids are receptive and can sponge joy or bitterness based on how you introduce them to the world.
I hope this helps but DM me if you’d like to chat further.