For subs only: the switch!

[xR****]

This is for people who originally identified as subs. Not people who always identified as doms or switches. Hear me out, there is a reason for this.

Have you ever dommed?
What was your experience like?
Would you consider doing it again?

As always, I'll go first:

Most of my life, my partners were vanilla. It was boring. The few times we got into any dynamic, I was always asked to dom them. I couldn't do shibari, but I got good at almost every other type of rigging. It wasn't hard. It was exciting! Or I thought it was.

It was the prepping that was exciting to me. The foreplay. The putting everything in place. The actual act? It was boring. Mundane. The actual part where I was taking control? I was on edge, constantly worrying about everything. I couldn't relax, I couldn't enjoy it. It was like trying to walk through a floor covered in Pringles without ever breaking one. The only enjoyment was When my partner came. I loved that. I never did. But, I didn't care. When I finally got to sub for someone, holy fucking shit. It was relaxing. Freeing. I felt floaty and it was just right!

Would I ever dom someone again? If they are a friend and if the mood strikes. It's rare. But, you know? Sometimes having a good friend you can switch with, sometimes you just ..want them. Someone who knows and understands it really isn't my role. But, outside of that? No way. I figured out my place. 🥰

[li****]

Honestly being submissive and letting someone do THR planning for you is probably the least strsss ful things it’s so nice to just know everything is sorted

[Deleted Member]

I love being a sub, I dont have to control everything or worry about how I look or putting a mask on my face. Unfortunatelly thwre are lots of fake doms making my and other subs experince awfull. Being sub does not mean being totally okav with 0 connection and low effort hookups. We are not piece of meats.

[li****]

Omg girl I get it the amount of guys and “ goddesses “ that try to make me do anything like no I have kinks and limits it’s not hard

[Deleted Member]

Yeah same only if our limits-boundries and kinks are similar then we can share a nice time

[TimberTara]

If it works for you all the power to you

[Pr****]

2 hours ago, gothnimph said:

I love being a sub, I dont have to control everything or worry about how I look or putting a mask on my face. Unfortunatelly thwre are lots of fake doms making my and other subs experince awfull. Being sub does not mean being totally okav with 0 connection and low effort hookups. We are not piece of meats.

Omg yes! I get so tired and frustrated by being treated like I should feel thankful to be used with zero connection. I don't mind if there is one that has been built because then it is out of choice. If I was claiming to be a slave or wanting to give blow-jobs to randoms then fine.

[kinkydarling]

3 hours ago, gothnimph said:

I love being a sub, I dont have to control everything or worry about how I look or putting a mask on my face. Unfortunatelly thwre are lots of fake doms making my and other subs experince awfull. Being sub does not mean being totally okav with 0 connection and low effort hookups. We are not piece of meats.

I’m a switch I get the Fake doms bothering me and I get presumptive male subs who start the conversation with an agenda. Sometimes even already acting like I am their Dom. Both ends are uncomfortable and weird. Unless I’m in a motto deal with that I don’t anymore. I want a conversation and to get to know someone first.

[TimberTara]

Nobody’s willing to invest the time to do it right everybody wants immediate satisfaction. I think that’s what you’re referring to.

[Deleted Member]

ZZzzzzzzzzzzz.....

[ma****]

12 hours ago, gothnimph said:

I love being a sub, I dont have to control everything or worry about how I look or putting a mask on my face. Unfortunatelly thwre are lots of fake doms making my and other subs experince awfull. Being sub does not mean being totally okav with 0 connection and low effort hookups. We are not piece of meats.

THIS. my personal experience has been heavier with subbing. it’s something ive been expected to do with most of if not all my amab relationships and recently found out is NOT something i enjoy like i original thought- it’s just what i knew: to be used without connection or with low effort just added to my already present disgust with being dominated by men. really hoping to find more folx to explore my domineering side with that will actually be PRESENT and CONNECT… genuinely i think the only times i got in my head about how i looked or what not was when i was with partners who were just using me for the orgasm and not sharing/reflecting the passion i was attempting to give them. :-/

[fe****]

I am completely a sub to my Dom. My vanilla life and work life I'm always im charge. I live in a home full of other submissive people and it drives me insane to constantly have to take the lead. Time with my Dom is when I can let go of everything. In the past I have come across a couple of guys that were submissive and tried to push me into being the dominant. I always felt so awkward and never knew what to do. I absolutely hated it.