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3:37 AM


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I realized I was waking up. I was aware of the darkness through my eyelids. My body felt…almost absent. To steal a song, “comfortably numb.”
I thought to look at the clock. That was my work persona exerting it’s influence. My newer retiree persona groggily shot him down. “We don’t care about the time,” it said.
So, why are we awakening?
My self-aware persona faded on and did a dreamy sensory scan of all bodily functions.
I had to pee.
Damn! I’m comfortable. I'll wait until daylight.
“No, no,” said Self-aware. “Your bladder will be so full you’ll hurt with every move,” he reminded me. He’s right, you know. I will snap awake in ***. Rolling over will be ***ful, sitting up will be excruciating. Standing will be accompanied with a jagged string of profanity. And, of course, at 7:00 AM the kids will be using, and arguing over, the bathroom.
No. I better go pee while it’s just a comfortable pressure. A message was sent, via neurons along my nervous system, for the lower back muscles to begin the sitting up maneuver
Nothing happened.
As expected, those muscles are having a dream without me. [Sigh] Sending more messages. Increasing urgency levels.
“Uh, dude,” they said, “the bladder says it’s just a tickle. Chill, man.”
Wow! My muscles rebelled! Great! I am too out of body to fight with them.
“Let us help.”
My eye struggled to pop open, and failed.
A set of warm, firm hands touched my naked body. But, I am fully covered, but for my head.
I struggled to roll over, sitting up
I discovered where these hands were. Under the covers. With me. Under the covers!
My head was gently guided down to the pillow. My shoulders and hips were firmly held down. Both thighs were gripped and made to spread apart a little bit. My knees were held firm and steady. My ankles were held to the mattress
That earlier rebellion evaporated and my muscles fought against these hands. Warm, firm and soft hands.
A shout formed in my throat, but another hand covered my mouth (and the covers flew over my head!)
“Let us help you. We’re here to help. We are enjoyable.”
What. The. Fuck?
Self-aware, I think it was him, decided on his own, without the usual consensus, to co-operate. Another rebellion!
Everything happened at once and in dreamy slow motion. I can write these things linearly, but it was all simultaneous.
My cock was held in an all-encompassing warm hand. I felt something invade my urethra. It, too, was warm, but more flexible than those hands! It encountered no resistance as it swiftly slid deeper.
Something firm violated my anus. I felt it move with ease into my rectum.
A wave of relief flowed through me. My bladder was emptied. My rectum filled with a comfortable chill.
My eyelids fluttered, then closed. The hands shifted from confining to cuddling. I felt a little light headed….
…“Can someone please tell me the time?” Work persona demanded.
“We don’t care,” answered Retiree.
“I see daylight,” said my eyes through closed lids.
“I feel awesome!” Declared my bladder.
Hello? Any other organ or persona have something to add?
“Giggle…”
There was a collective “Huh? What?” from all known personas.
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