Personal details

Gender Man
Age 36
Status Not single
Hair length
Zodiac sign Taurus

About me

Interested in:

I’m looking for:

  • Friends

Description

Just looking to understand more about a woman I just met and some things she has helped me to explore within myself.

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Stoic
icon-wio Stoic has logged into Fetish.com after being away for some time. Say hi!
  • 26.08.2018 22:15:15
  • Male (36)
  • Plano
  • Not single
Stoic
icon-wio Stoic wrote something in the forum
  • 29.05.2018 20:30:31
  • Male (36)
  • Plano
  • Not single
New dom trying to understand/accomodate.

This is going really great, btw. No black eyes... but hey, I'm kinda starting to like the idea of it. We have discussed ways we can excuse it (like going to a (metal/rock) concert the night of the black eye and blaming it on the show getting rough...)
We are enjoying exploring it together and it's Read more… really a treat. It's brought us so close together so quickly it's hard to believe. We barely leave each other's sides. Thank to everyone for the great advice and wish me luck going forward.

Likeeyemblacksheep · Jump to discussion
Stoic
icon-wio Stoic wrote something in the forum
  • 13.04.2018 3:31:09
  • Male (36)
  • Plano
  • Not single
New dom trying to understand/accomodate.

She has done a great deal of research and has a particular technique in mind. This will be done in a controlled way. I'm also interested in waiting because I've only ever fought for self-defense and I have honestly lived a life where it came up a lot. I've fought hundreds of times and I didn't use Read more… restraint, now I am learning to control how hard and where I hit, but it's going well and she loves the outcome so far. I also have never hit a woman (goes without saying), so I'm learning to adjust to her anatomy (much more delicate than a man's). GREAT care will be taken to ensure no permanent damage is done. The more likely outcome would be that she gets no black eye, and we try again another time.
The second part of your post brings me to a VERY important question. I want to have a waiver/contract that states this is of her choosing, without coercion/bribery/etc. I need to know more about how to draw up such a document, but it may be better to post a new thread. Hell, there may be 100 threads about it. Someone here might know exactly what I need (website/resource/etc.) to help me draw up such a document. We will get it notarized and I will keep multiple copies. Equally or MORE importantly: Do such documents offer any protection from legal action/police interference? This is a subject that is very important to me. I want to understand more because I would be much more able to relax and enjoy myself knowing that I won't go to prison because the state doesn't believe her when she says it was consensual. Thanks in advance for any stories/resources/assurances that anyone can offer on this subject.
In all honesty, I doubt it will come to this. We are sort of past the point where she could flip and start trying to have me locked up. She hasn't, and I did trust her before that point. I just think this is important because of third-parties (parents, friends, hospitals, police, etc.)

LikeBigPolly, PatientTraveller · Jump to discussion
Stoic
icon-wio Stoic wrote something in the forum
  • 12.04.2018 4:31:58
  • Male (36)
  • Plano
  • Not single
New dom trying to understand/accomodate.

It's a thought... or I could just have this conversation with her. It is her best friend after all. But I think it's not jealousy. As I hear it the girl is more dominant than submissive. I'm afraid that vanillas will never understand what she and I do, regardless of explanations. It's all way more Read more… passionate and loving than I ever realized. The aftercare, alone, is amazing. I am so enjoying the time I spend with her that I really don't care what others think about it, beyond them thinking that I am abusing her (I'm not.)
The others who denied her the chance to play out her fantasies were abusing her by denying her the chance to explore her own mind and body. It feels good to be the one to do that for her while at the same time exploring my sadistic side, which I always kept under tight lock and key.

LikePatientTraveller · Jump to discussion
Stoic
icon-wio Stoic created a topic in New to BDSM, Kink & Fetish?
  • 11.04.2018 23:49:47
  • Plano
New dom trying to understand/accomodate.
So, I've met a lovely young woman and I truly do enjoy her company. I brought her home and we had very disappointing time in bed (mainly frustrating for both of us.) I thought it was too drunk/too hot (temperature in room), bad diet, etc... but no. On the second night she came home with me, she Read more…told me she is into bruising and being dominated. I was shook up at first, but as I considered it I realized I always got rougher when I was aroused and wondered if I could get aroused when I was rougher with a girl. I asked her to show me how to hit her, smack her, hold her throat etc... She JUST melted. I was aroused. I was hooked.
I'm only able to keep going (orgasm) when I know a woman is turned on to a high degree. If they don't enjoy it, I can't. Now that I know what she wants and enjoy giving it to her we have no problems.
At first we only did throat holding, etc. I was able to make her get off this way. After that she showed me how to hit her in the face... I was able to get hard because of how much she enjoyed it. I found I enjoy it also. I now can't wait to get my hands on her and I really can't get enough of dominating her. I'm still new to talking about it so forgive me if my description is not completely accurate as far as terminology and description.
Where I've gotten stuck: She likes bruising. I like that she likes that. She takes pics of her bruises and is fascinated by them. No one would ever do this for her but me, I'm the first. I got her pretty good one night and she was sore/bruised all over, she loved it... I loved it. She then asked me to give her a black eye.
The thing is, I'm concerned about going around with a woman with a black eye. I worry that people will think something is terribly wrong. I really want to do this, not only for her but for me... I know that as long as she is happy with the outcome, I will be too. I see her bruises now and I get turned on. Texts about how sore she is drive me NUTS.
I asked her "So we will be in (our bar) and you'll just be sitting at the table with your friends with a black eye?" She says "mhm" in a cute, nice way. "You'll just go to work with a black eye?" "mhm"
I'm the new one at the bar, she's been there a while. I'm the new friend in the group, they're her friends. She told her friend how I bruised her (the friend is aware of her kink) and the friend wouldn't make eye contact with me the entire night after finding out...
I'm a genuinely good guy. I have tried my whole life to be a better man each day. I want to be all that she needs and I've told her I will do this, it will just take time. We've been together less than a week and spent every night exploring this, so far. I honestly don't want to prevent her from having a black eye if it is truly what she wants... I just don't want to lose all my new friends over it either.
My thought process is this: I'm a good man. She is going to get a black eye, one way or the other, from someone if not me. I would much rather take the responsibility for her safety/pleasure than let some other person (who knows what they'd be like?) do so.
Can anyone offer advice on coping with friends/onlookers? Has anyone ever faced something similar?
Hopefully you will all be supportive and instructional, rather than judgemental and condescending. I'm prepared to ignore many replies saying I'm not the one for the job, etc. I hope that none come, but knowing how the internet works I'm sure they will. Thanks to all those who stay within the scope of my question and offer information and resources that can help me and my submissive.
LikeSotaZero, PatientTraveller · 17 Replies
FootTimes
FootTimes ➦FootTimes quote eyemblacksheep:❝whilst that cover story fits, do you not also think that's counter-productive on discretion ?
I mean whatever story you invent, starting with "I went to a BDSM dungeon..." you may as well just tell the truth at that point.
"I went to a BDSM dungeon and a Dom Read more… gave her a black eye" - yeah, that's gonna be good press.....❞
This is precisely the reason why I asked Stoic if he feels comfortable speaking about BDSM dungeons. Everyone is different, and there are definitely those who are willing to openly discuss it. If he isn't, then it shouldn't even be mentioned. But if he does feel comfortable discussing it, it would be a great reason. Not sure if you're aware, but those dungeons don't mess around. if a person wants pain, cuts, or black eyes, the Doms would gladly administer them. Some clients arrive as couples. I know of one who brought his girlfriend or wife in to get beat up by a mistress because she did something wrong. That mistress told me she let her have it.
Like · 11.06.2018 0:13:00
eyemblacksheep
eyemblacksheep whilst that cover story fits, do you not also think that's counter-productive on discretion ?
I mean whatever story you invent, starting with "I went to a BDSM dungeon..." you may as well just tell the truth at that point.
"I went to a BDSM dungeon and a Dom gave her a black eye" - yeah, that's gonna be good press..... whilst that cover story fits, do you not also think that's counter-productive on discretion ?
I mean whatever story you invent, starting with "I went to a BDSM dungeon..." you may as well just tell the truth at that point.
"I went to a BDSM dungeon and a Dom gave her a black eye" - yeah, that's gonna be good press.....
Like · 05.06.2018 8:06:43
FootTimes
FootTimes Are you and your friend open to speaking to others about BDSM dungeons? I am asking because the two of you can make up a story that she got the black eye because the two of you went to one of the dungeons . You can say that one of the Doms at the place gave this to her. I "live" for hours at a time in one of these dungeons as a foot slave, and I see these type of situations all the time. Are you and your friend open to speaking to others about BDSM dungeons? I am asking because the two of you can make up a story that she got the black eye because the two of you went to one of the dungeons . You can say that one of the Doms at the place gave this to her. I "live" for hours at a time in one of these dungeons as a foot slave, and I see these type of situations all the time.
Like · 05.06.2018 4:17:43
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