How to Manage Long-Distance Submission Without Feeling Abandoned?

[Lyla356]

Hi everyone. I’m in a long-distance relationship with a Dominant, but we’ve been struggling to progress in our dynamic because he feels he can’t train me from a distance. However, I feel like I’m missing that structure and control, and sometimes it affects me psychologically.

 

I’m new to this world and just discovering my little side, but I don’t know how to handle submission without feeling alone or without guidance. I’d love to know if there are other submissives or littles who have felt this way and how they’ve dealt with it.

 

How do you stay in your role in a long-distance dynamic? What strategies have helped you maintain the connection with your Dominant?

 

Any advice or experiences would be really helpful. Thank you!

[ey****]

long distance relationships are hard and, sadly, not for everyone

if your Dominant feels he cannot train you from a distance - that's it, that's the answer -  it's not going to work I'm afraid.

[Submissive_summer]

I completely understand how your feeling structure.. support and guidance are important parts of a dynamic... so feeling disconnected can be really difficult......

Long distance dynamics come with unique challenges.. (as does every dynamic) but a strong bond and clear communication really doee create a fulfilling and structured experience... often people can forget to communicate the simplest things... like they won't be around for a fixed prolonged time as they have things happening ... that can cause uncertainty to any overthinker...

When i was first in a long distance dynamic..... I didnt feel unguided because my Dominant maintained constant communication......provided clear expectations and nurtured my growth......
As an example... he helped me to enroll online courses and monitored my progression... we jointly worked on things together that helped keep us connected...

Still... yes.... there were still moments of loneliness..... but that can happen in any relationship near or far.... when we feel like our emotional needs arent being fullfilled or lack of communication and engagement these feelings can arise..... there's a balance to be striked between expectations and reality but thia should be communicated...

What helped me was having a structured routine.... things like... daily check-ins... assigned tasks....scheduled training sessions.... (all done virtually)..
This kept me engaged and rein***d the connection and roles...

If your Dominant feels he cant train you from a distance..... it may be worth discussing specific ways he can provide you structure..... Maybe set up daily affirmations... rules.... or rituals that help you feel grounded.... scheduled calls.... written tasks... or even simple morning and evening check-ins can make a huge difference.....

You could also ask for guidance in journaling... self-reflection exercises....or even small challenges that keep you engaged and active within your desired headspace/ role...

That said.... its also important to consider whether your needs and his ability to provide structure/guidance/support align......

If your feeling unfulfilled and he isnt able to offer the time and connection you need then its okay to reflect on whether this is the right dynamic for you.....

In any new journey theres alot going on... your currently finding your submissive self and your little side alongside other traits and characteristics that might be discovered along your path.... it can be an exciting and confusing time...a good Dominant would nurture and guide you in a way that fosters security not leaves you feeling lost and neglected and definitely not a burden for needing more....

Your not alone in this and your feelings are valid.... I hope you find the clarity and support you need..

[Deleted Member]

Long distance sure has its challenges! It is not for everyone.
Clear communication is important.
Talk about needs without *** of a breakup. Make changes if needed.
Have a schedule. We have assigned one day a week for our ritual for example.
I can ask for tasks any time.
We ALWAYS say good morning and good night. We make sure to see eachother once a month. And He has been amazing with spontaneous visits here and there.
Loneliness will come, I certainly have my moments. As long as those moments are way less than the moments of happiness, you can make it work.
I can't stress the importance of open communication enough!!
Good luck!