FFM Relations

[Ma****]

My sub says she hates the women I choose for our threesomes, and I’m not entirely sure why. Some of them look a lot like her, while others are completely different. Early on, she said she didn’t like my usual type, so I’ve made an effort to mix things up—different body types, races, and so on.

But at this point, I’m starting to wonder if the issue isn’t who I’m choosing, but how I’m dividing my attention. I’ve glanced over a couple of times during a session and caught her seething with jealousy. I care about her and genuinely want her to enjoy the experience. How can I make this better?

[Wh****]

Maybe she feels like you find the other person more attractive. Try asking her for her preferences. Maybe she wants somebody..not as pretty as her lol

[Co****]

Just ask her point blank or give her a dominant role over the other women and let her choose

[Deleted Member]

I'd want to be a part of the process and build my own bond to who I may potentially be participating with. Looking like me doesn't mean it is me. We are own unique individuals, and we all have different needs. I want to be included and pick someone who stands out to my own instincts and initiate contact and see if we bond and connect. If it so happens after a couple dates then I'd probably ask if we're both ready and go from there. Also try to communicate about what you're doing to get those reactions you appear to notice

[Deleted Member]

Maybe let her pick or if you're willing try a MMF threesome, or sit down and have a long conversation about if she actually enjoys it.

[Richbyname]

Yep.. She probably feels your natural thrill at a new person and takes it as a snub... Why not try arranging the situation with the new girl positioned to the side while you engage with your partner, and provide lots of praise?🤷‍♂️

[Re****]

Find another woman more sub than yours, than put yours in charge of her. Make clear that your little girl is the second in command and in your heart too.

[Ed****]

Communication is the key. Talk to her about how she feels and why. And really listen to what she has to say without judging or objecting to it. It may just be she feels left out somehow or she's just got a jealous streak and you both need to figure out what works best for your relationship

[Te****]

I’ve never had a threesome but why are YOU choosing the other woman and why is everyone not enjoying each other mutually? Surely she should be part of the search and decision making process rather than you just picking someone you like? Sounds more like you getting to fuck other women you want to fuck in front of her and allowing her to join in… rather than a mutually enjoyable experience.

[Sa****]

Have a conversation, if she’s not into them then you have a choice to make. Maybe ask her what her type would be, or involve her in the process…maybe give her the task to find the girl IF she is interested!
Make sure she understands how you feel about her and then LISTEN, also be clear there are no consequences for her thoughts during this! You’re trying to read her mind and truthfully she may not know exactly what she’s thinking…so for you it’s a fools errand when you can just ask

[Ka****]

Stop. Clearly...

1. Communicate with her openly and ask her to articulate what's wrong. Engaging with threesomes doesnt make you kinky, communication, transparency, honesty, vulnerability and respect do. If your observation is correct, she's not being honest, snd feels uncomfortable being *** with you, if you believe your observation about jealousy and do it anyway, you do not respect if you arent opening up the conversation to get curious and she is not responding to you, neither is being transparent. Go back to basics, you lost your way.

2. Take the hint and stop being selfish, if she's seething with jealousy are you stopping? Doesnt sound like it. You say you care about her but not enough to stop or pause something shes covertly communicating she doesnt want. She is communicating with you, her anger, her sitting back, her criticising your choices. You just arent listening. The question really is - are you deaf or are you ignoring her commu cations cause that's not what you want to hear?

[No****]

Sounds like a conversation you need to have together. Does she really want a threesome or is she just doing it to make you happy?

[Do****]

Your sub should remain your priority, Sir. Even in the scene, if she's emotionally uncomfortable, make her emotionally comfortable. I find that inviting or instructing her interaction is beneficial. "Does Kitten feel abandoned? Honey, I need you in this moment. Come here and...(fill in the blanks with your instructions). Enjoy. Don't forget subs are curious about switching and willing in defense of their Dom's attention. Let her give your sub some of the same action as you.

[Ju****]

Big picture...Either, 1. Your sub doesn't like having FFM threesomes, but tries to tolerate them because she is your sub, and you enjoy them. 2. She wants to pick the women involved herself, or 3. She wants to be the focal point of the threesome and right now, you are making the other woman the focal point of the threesome. Figure out which of these three things it is, and you can easily find a solution.

[jw****]

I guess the best thing anyone can say is sit and talk with your partner find out where the issues are really laying down at find out what she's not saying couple things that come to me when I read what you write is a *** of loseing your to another person and or b wanting you all to them selfs and not saying it and when you suggest a person she goes along but internally she's not into it just ideas to explore I could be way off base but that's what I hear

[Deleted Member]

Maybe try to make her feel like she has your attention..try kissing her while you are intimate with another..make her feel seen and touch her while you are being pleasured..

[Te****]

What happened to my comment?

[Mi****]

Give her the opportunity to choose a playmate to join you. Let her have a bit of input. She has to have an attraction to them as well. It’s more about communicating between the two of you in who you want to join you in the bedroom.

[Ke****]

You and your third, should be focusing your attention on her, not you.

[ry****]

Maybe let her choose

[Di****]

Bring her a man then she will be happy!!!

[Ta****]

Could be that she's just not built for threesomes, and maybe she keeps agreeing to them because she's not quite self-aware enough to realize that.

[st****]

This is something she needs to work on within. She may want you all to herself. If this isn't something you 2 agreed upon, then this is going to affect your dynamics. You may need to play with others separate from her. or take a pause for her to work on jealous emotions. And when she is ready to play fairly with others, slowly let her back in. Make your own boundaries. She is not in control of you. You are.

[it****]

Maybe have point her out what she likes. If she hasn’t had input.

[co****]

Sounds to me like she's doing this more for your benefit than hers. There is only one option that I can see. Tell her to choose your third.