Mental image

[In****]

Sub ladies (well and the sub guys) - do you have a mental image of how your dom/domme would look like/act?
Have you found someone like that image or found the image should just be completely discarded?

[Sh****]

Yes my dom looks and acts like my mother in law

[Co****]

I did.....epic fail. It's the ones you don't expect that are surprising wonderful.

[ta****]

Of course! That’s what keeps us all here, right?

[li****]

To me:
A dom takes good care of himself (hygiene, job wise. Not so much weight, that can't always be helped anyway). He has an "air" of confidence and independence about him.
Why? Because, I want to find a dom who has it together enough that I can trust him and know his history (where he is today, based on the fact that he can take care of himself).

Discarded views:
-Overly confident
*starts bossing me around after only knowing each other for a short time or thinks to highly of himself (no one can measure up to his standards)
- doesn't listen to what I am saying/asking. Just goes off of what he wants to hear.
- asking for nudes soon after just talking.
*tells me you're more interested in sex than me as a human.
- avoids video calls

These are just some of the common quick things I look at. I hope this helps. Disregard those that you don't like. This is just my personal view/experience.

[du****]

Yes well dressed, caring

[Sh****]

11 hours ago, ConnieSwail1323 said:

I did.....epic fail. It's the ones you don't expect that are surprising wonderful.

Exactly the fact it was my mother in law was intense

[Co****]

2 hours ago, Shyftguy said:

Exactly the fact it was my mother in law was intense

That's a lot to take in lol. But hopefully that somehow worked out.

[Sh****]

36 minutes ago, ConnieSwail1323 said:

That's a lot to take in lol. But hopefully that somehow worked out.

Yes I was her sub the entire 18 yr marriage

[Ro****]

Original image is adjusted through a reality lens as I experienced and learned more of what my preferences are. Do not follow a physical type but more of a personality I find doms who have a genuine gentlemen streak to anyone they interact with are usually the best doms.

[Sh****]

21 hours ago, ConnieSwail1323 said:

That's a lot to take in lol. But hopefully that somehow worked out.

Yes I was her sub the entire 18 yr marriage

[In****]

Yesterday at 04:15 AM, RogueLynx said:

Original image is adjusted through a reality lens as I experienced and learned more of what my preferences are. Do not follow a physical type but more of a personality I find doms who have a genuine gentlemen streak to anyone they interact with are usually the best doms.

Yes been what I've looked at more recently. I think my image is more personality than looks nowadays. Voice is a big one for me x

[Ba****]

I spent a lot of time working out what I could offer a person and what I needed from them in return. I was ***fully honest with myself about my weaknesses so I could either work on them or with them to find the right person for me. I should add in, I’m demisexual and sapiosexual, so physical attraction can grow in unconventional places.

I refused to settle on that list. There’s no rush to jump into a relationship or dynamic. It doesn’t make you more valid. It was worth everything. He is a trainwreck on so many levels, but he’s my calm.

If I’d had to write down my ideal perfect person spur of the moment, I would never have described him. I’m so glad I didn’t do it that way.