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Im not sure what my kink/orientation is. Im new to exploring but I know what I am. For context my love language is physical touch not sex. I want to be in control in public settings most of the time, with the exception of being tired and overstimulated then i want someone to silently take control. Although in private im desperate for someone to lovingly dominate me, for example commanding me to do something then praising me to do it and rewarding me i.e rubbing my ear or playing with my hair. What is this? Is it a kink or something to do with my mental state.
Im going to remove .myself from this but it sounds like you got a case of the ever so popular good girl syndrome , lol. Nothing wrong with that and it actually turns us dom guys on and fits real naturally if your with a dom which isn't hard to find. I say you should explore those cravings and find someone who responds well to them in a genuine way and maybe explore a little further. Thanks for your openness.
20 minutes ago, Firepit said:
Praise kink

Submissive

Possibly a slave kink but I don't know.

Im not sure what a slave kink is but it sounds right i think, I have a deep desire to serve.

19 minutes ago, Billfo73 said:
Im going to remove .myself from this but it sounds like you got a case of the ever so popular good girl syndrome , lol. Nothing wrong with that and it actually turns us dom guys on and fits real naturally if your with a dom which isn't hard to find. I say you should explore those cravings and find someone who responds well to them in a genuine way and maybe explore a little further. Thanks for your openness.

While I know doms arent hard to find, im looking for a domme, thank you for the kind words and advice I really hope to be able to explore these things one day, I have immense social anxiety so its hard to connect with people.

I am also learning, sorry if this is an inaccurate assessment.
It sounds like you are looking for a switch, someone to be sub in public, but dom in private. Not only a switch, but a soft switch.
3 minutes ago, Rend5757 said:
I am also learning, sorry if this is an inaccurate assessment.
It sounds like you are looking for a switch, someone to be sub in public, but dom in private. Not only a switch, but a soft switch.

I was unaware of what a switch was, if that is true I deeply appreciate the clarification

It is a part of a non-sexual kink and its common! Dont get discouraged. There are a lot of doms who are into that too. A lot of times, non-sexual kink would add more depth to the sexual connection so most kinksters already doing that by default. But if youre just not into the sexual aspect, let the person you are talking to know. Set clear boundaries and establish clear communication.
You're a switch. There is no all encompassing definition for anyone. We're all the same and we're all different. I enjoy similar things like being submissive to most women most of the time in cool totally non sexual ways like just doing whatever they ask and letting them make decisions while I do all the hard work and labor. Physical touch is 🥰 I love massaging and caressing my woman daily, especially getting hot water with essential oils to ready to rub her feet as soon as she's home at the end of the day then after cooking and cleaning and showers/baths I like giving back and shoulder massages and petting her, but sometimes my natural dominant tendencies are needed to control situations and I relish in providing protection and peace. I enjoy choking and spanking only after I see her enjoying it, and I'd rather receive punishment. Everyone is different, and nothing is wrong with you. You're perfect 😍
Thank you so much guys, I've struggled with accepting this part of my life for years as it doesn't fit the traditional male bravado I grew up with but seeing all the kind words and acceptance from everyone here has really opened my eyes to it being okay. Thank you for accepting me and I truly cant wait to explore this side of myself.
12 minutes ago, Firepit said:

That's the word. Slave didnt sound right but couldn't think of another

Yeah service orientated submissive with a prajse kink, but I think he's maybe a Little who enjoys care not age play

5 hours ago, clear_spring said:

Yeah service orientated submissive with a prajse kink, but I think he's maybe a Little who enjoys care not age play

What is a little? And care not age play?

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