Can someone explain SPANKS

[Bi****]

I need someone to explain spanks. If I start going through the list. Let’s say I spank one. X another. Then I go to spank the next and of course it says I can’t spank for whatever dumb reason and now it wants me to buy some gift (which I’m not doing. Doesn’t allow me to include a message or even show up somewhere I can see) so at this point I have one option. To X that person.

How does that make any sense? I’m not saying no to that person you are forcing me to say no. So these people we don’t get to see again? And if they were to spank us it’s not a match because I clicked X. Am I missing something. So if a hot girl comes up and I don’t want to buy her some dumb little image I have to say no to her? You realize that’s ridiculous right?

[CaraVirt]

Hey @BigChanges,

Spanks are simply a way to show interest in someone’s profile. If both users spank each other, it creates a match.

If you see a message about sending a gift or upgrading, that’s related to messaging or contact permissions — not the spank itself. Some profiles have restrictions depending on membership type or settings.

Clicking “X” only means you’re not sending a spank at that moment. It doesn’t permanently block the person, and profiles can appear again depending on the system rotation.

You’re not being f@rced to reject someone — it just means that certain contact options require specific conditions (like a match or membership level).

Hope that clarifies how the feature works.

Greetings, Carmen FET Team

[Ma****]

Like swipping "yes" or "no" on tinder

[Fr****]

If you can't send a message to someone or only send a gift option appears, it could also be caused by messaging filters set by the profile owner. Some people set messaging filters based on age or other criteria, because they simply don't want to be contacted by people not matching what they are looking for.

[Deleted Member]

It’s this app’s version of a Like

[19****]

31 minutes ago, CaraVirt said:

Hey @BigChanges,

Spanks are simply a way to show interest in someone’s profile. If both users spank each other, it creates a match.

If you see a message about sending a gift or upgrading, that’s related to messaging or contact permissions — not the spank itself. Some profiles have restrictions depending on membership type or settings.

Clicking “X” only means you’re not sending a spank at that moment. It doesn’t permanently block the person, and profiles can appear again depending on the system rotation.

You’re not being f@rced to reject someone — it just means that certain contact options require specific conditions (like a match or membership level).

Hope that clarifies how the feature works.

Greetings, Carmen FET Team

Hi Carmen. That is insightful. Thank you. Can you tell us more about contact permissions and how that works? I could potentially eliminate contacts reaching out based on what I put on my permissions? Where would I do this? I understand membership levels.

[jo****]

11 minutes ago, 1974Dabbler said:

Hi Carmen. That is insightful. Thank you. Can you tell us more about contact permissions and how that works? I could potentially eliminate contacts reaching out based on what I put on my permissions? Where would I do this? I understand membership levels.

The system seems to put an age limit as an automatic filter on accounts, too. If the account has never changed the filter they may not even know it’s there.

I found a profile that said in its description that she was looking for only older Dom Daddies and then there was a filter that kept everyone from responding. I know her personally and she said she never set that filter.

[DS****]

But sometimes a spank enables messaging when not possible prior 🤷

[Ma****]

Like swipping "yes" or "no" on tinder

[JA****]

It needs fixing ASAP.

[Lu****]

you can Fav the person everytime you like a profile but cant send free messages or slaps, and do it next day

[Ge****]

I fave them for another time in case they've visited my profile and I like them but can't spank bc they may not realize their criteria may be restrictive to not allow me to spank them...maybe 1 year above their age criteria or something miniscule.
To the OP, I know it's frustrating especially when some of us are very selective with what we're seeking.

[Su****]

Also be aware if you buy the VIP plan. It states unlimited Spanks but not really? I've disputed with their service department for weeks and they just send back generic emails. If you purchase VIP it does NOT come with unlimited Spanks even though they claim it does. Hope this helps.

[d_guglieme]

The app is here to draw *** for somebody. Making us pay for basic functionality is one way to do that.

(Agreed that it is a lousy way to operate though.)

Sending a spank can sometimes "break" the paywall for sending messages.

[FE****]

12 minutes ago, Superhair said:

Also be aware if you buy the VIP plan. It states unlimited Spanks but not really? I've disputed with their service department for weeks and they just send back generic emails. If you purchase VIP it does NOT come with unlimited Spanks even though they claim it does. Hope this helps.

The site limits spanks, even for paid members.  If you see unlimited stated somewhere could you PM me so I can get that corrected?

[FE****]

12 minutes ago, d_guglieme said:

Sending a spank can sometimes "break" the paywall for sending messages.

It's by design.  You may have a filter in place, however a member attracts your attention, you can 'spank' them and that allows them to message you even though the filter is there.

[Su****]

See^^^^ generic replies. I've literally emailed multiple times with screenshots of conversations stating other wise

[Se****]

2 hours ago, MadameStephanieMason said:

Like swipping "yes" or "no" on tinder

The spanks here are similar to the FB - Pokes. Except for the fact that you only get a certain amount of pokes per day with the free membership.
It's not like Tinder where you "like" each other and create a match.
That page that looks like you can "like" or "X" people is misleading. The X does nothing at all, and the "like" sends a spank.
Next thing: The "Match"
Spanking or not spanking someone has no influence on your matches. Every once in a while, I get a match. Mostly, it's a profile that hasn't been online for months, and if you open it, you see "match scores" with hearts. So, I assume a match is just a profile in your wider area that was picked randomly out of a bunch of people whose kinks match mine.

Gifts: Gifts are paid by credits. There are a few things that you can trade in your credits and so on, but that's a different story.

[Se****]

If you paid you can spank infinitely, except for the members who have filtered out certain criteria. Can’t spank em. But you can send them gifts. So if u wanna spank a 22 yr old and your 32, and their filter is at 30 yr or less, no spank. But u can give gift. This is what you’re seeing.

[FE****]

1 hour ago, Superhair said:

See^^^^ generic replies. I've literally emailed multiple times with screenshots of conversations stating other wise

I am one of the forum mods, not one of the back-end support people.  I don't have access to what they see.  As discussed, I  am willing to escalate if you can send me examples.

[Ma****]

Yeah it’s completely broken, there’s a few things on here that don’t make sense

[Se****]

Correction: Not infinite, but many more than free members.

[Sk****]

This kind of stuff is the #1 reason people won't pay. Complex, obfu***ed systems are the opposite of the customer experience. All these apps decide to make users their enemy for some reason, and they all feel like scam claw machines at the arcade, so people look but keep walking. Alliance with the user in the form of simplicity, transparency, and power user features would result in more customers.

[Bi****]

Happens to me too. I’ll get one or two in and then the app won’t let me do another one unless I pay for it. I’d rather not pay for it but the only other option is to reject that person

[db****]

How do you even match with people on this app? Shit makes no sense