seen elsewhere but got me thinking

[UK****]

In BDSM we talk a lot about our acceptance of our kinks and our general acceptance of changed roles.

I saw tonight (on other groups) the following ads...

"Domineering goddess, I am looking for a sub ready to submit fully in his daily life in order to be worthy of the time I grant him. Be ready to be mine, and obey me little slut."

"your aim and goal in life must be to satisfy my pleasure and wants. you must always worship me, respect and obey me with no questioning my orders or my sovereignty. i don’t want no stubborn or adamant individual who is just looking to fuck all in disguise, no time wasters, you must know your place as a miserable slave and what you want , which is my total domination. "

 

It got me thinking, if the same ads were posted by male doms instead of female would we be so accepting of them?

Is this a supply and demand kink, what drives it, the lack of good female doms or the surplus of male subs?

Is the language driven by the women or the men?

 

[Deleted Member]

Think most ads I've seen like that are by wanted, as in pay for their services, doesn't interest me in the slightest but sure it'll float a boat somewhere, with regards to make ads, I don't have them come up on my timeline but not seen any as degrading as that, but I don't think a male dom wants to impose that kind of image, it's more about control rather than making the sub worship them, most men and women think differently so bound to language differences

[Deleted Member]

From my experience a lot of the "Dommes" are nothing more than con merchants and play upto what they perceive how they should be seen. A really good point though, if it were Doms posting lile this, they I think would be ridiculed and shunned.

[Deleted Member]

Very interesting question posed. If a guy/dom did write this, he’d be thought of a pervert without respect for women. 
I do think that it’s double standards but also men on the whole are a lot more shallow and desperate. 
why would you want to pay for these services?

[Deleted Member]

Erm, male Doms post these kind of messages daily. They just send them straight to female subs.

[Deleted Member]

Just now, Curvykate said:

Erm, male Doms post these kind of messages daily. They just send them straight to female subs.

Not all Doms etc etc

[Mz****]

The same ads Are posted by male Doms, my news feed usually has at least a couple or three a week that I see.. they're also posted by male s type, almost daily, as in that's what they're looking for, I'm sure the majority of women here have received messages using that type of language whichever side of the slash they sit, I know I have.

I suspect the wording used stems from the *** that a lot crave, and a perception from either 'newbies' to BDSM as opposed to kink, or newcomers to Domination, that believe that's how to speak/act having most of their information gleaned from porn or erotica..personally if someone refers to themselves as Goddess I invariably assume Pro or Fin, (real or chancers) and they of course are tailoring their words for their market.

[Deleted Member]

If you are a newbie, then you could get sucked into an unhappy first relationship and then be truly messed up for awhile.  Some people are out there just to hurt others for their own satisfaction. 

[ey****]

12 hours ago, UK_Knight said:

It got me thinking, if the same ads were posted by male doms instead of female would we be so accepting of them?

Male Doms make these posts all the time.

12 hours ago, UK_Knight said:

Is this a supply and demand kink, what drives it, the lack of good female doms or the surplus of male subs?

The shortage/surplus is a myth.  It's certainly not as wide apart as guys who don't get what they want claim.

[ey****]

Though, ads like that.

It's usually a regurgitated fantasy - and - to be honest, yeah - the person posting is *possibly* either not a Female Dominant and is running some form of scam - or - they are selling services and are inexperienced.

But, a lot does tie in a little bit with the fantasy (some) male subs have.

[Mz****]

7 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

Male Doms make these posts all the time.

The shortage/surplus is a myth.  It's certainly not as wide apart as guys who don't get what they want claim.

I genuinely think there is a shortage,  but of male submissives..there's no shortage of kinksters, or fetishists, bottoms or masochists, or orgasm chasers playing at being sub to get their rocks off, but actual submissives..they seem to be a dying breed. 

[Deleted Member]

16 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

Though, ads like that.

It's usually a regurgitated fantasy - and - to be honest, yeah - the person posting is *possibly* either not a Female Dominant and is running some form of scam - or - they are selling services and are inexperienced.

But, a lot does tie in a little bit with the fantasy (some) male 

[Deleted Member]

Maybe there should be (male) offering his services lol

[ey****]

3 minutes ago, Artemis0 said:

Maybe there should be (male) offering his services lol

There are.

[ey****]

19 minutes ago, MzJax said:

I genuinely think there is a shortage,  but of male submissives..there's no shortage of kinksters, or fetishists, bottoms or masochists, or orgasm chasers playing at being sub to get their rocks off, but actual submissives..they seem to be a dying breed. 

I agree massively - and that's a big factor in why the ratio is a lot tighter than (usually) guys give credit for.

[Mz****]

Just now, Artemis0 said:

Maybe there should be (male) offering his services lol

I've actually been approached by one Dom whom offered to switch for , and more s types than I can count who'll do whatever no limits stuff I want if I lock them in my (non existant) basement dungeon and take care of their expenses..though what expenses they'd be I've never bothered checking..theres a lot post looking for mommies and daddies too..seems like Everything is for sale if you look hard enough, or even casually glance 😅

[ey****]

Arguably - the last time I filmed I was paid (literally my expenses - but - hey, get to have fun with someone I like and not have expenses above the burger on the way home? OK!) so technically, yep, I've been paid for services haha

[Mz****]

12 minutes ago, MzJax said:

I've actually been approached by one Dom whom offered to switch for , and more s types than I can count who'll do whatever no limits stuff I want if I lock them in my (non existant) basement dungeon and take care of their expenses..though what expenses they'd be I've never bothered checking..theres a lot post looking for mommies and daddies too..seems like Everything is for sale if you look hard enough, or even casually glance 😅

The algorithm or whatever took words out that changed the meaning of this, weird I can't say "whom offered to switch for c a s h"  and also "looking for s u g a r mommies and daddies" 

[Deleted Member]

There are different social (and other) ***s acting on men and women. The curse of being a woman might be the disapointment and frustration of the  bulging inbox of bungled dom attempts.

The curse of being a man is the very high chance that you are not subtle enough - or don't have the patience - to make your  self more of a desirable prospect. So you have nothing in your inbox. Not "noting much" but nothing at all, nada. .. ever. 

 

It's not a competition to prove which gender has the worst time. It's a challenge to make sense of how to make the best of the usually pretty limited selves. Hopefully without screwing it up for too many other people in the process.

 

That's how it looks to me anyway

[Bo****]

1 hour ago, MzJax said:

The algorithm or whatever took words out that changed the meaning of this, weird I can't say "whom offered to switch for c a s h"  and also "looking for s u g a r mommies and daddies" 

Unintentional derail, but thanks for the clarifying why intelligent people sometimes suddenly sound very clunky on this forum.

[Mz****]

2 minutes ago, BoulderDom said:

Unintentional derail, but thanks for the clarifying why intelligent people sometimes suddenly sound very clunky on this forum.

It's bitten me a couple of times lately, which is why I often ask for clarification from others, when, as you say, someone seemingly rational and intelligent goes all clunky..(great word)..

[cautiousswitch]

There are a few women who would respond positively to an ad like that from a man, but they are well outnumbered by those who would call the man a pig.

The women I've seen post like that have failed to convince me that they have any real experience as a domme (usually by how poorly they write the ad) and I would suspect that any man who wrote an ad like that would also not be very convincing.

[Th****]

The problem is we live in a community where fakes and charlatans are prevalent. Please people pose a real risk to the BDSM and kink community. Their inexperience and knowledge of BDSM and kink are shocking the damage that can be done 1by these people can be horrific and permanent causing subordinates both male and female to leave the BDSM and kink community forever. These type of fake doms should be wheedle out and sent back to chat and date where they belong

[Carnelian2]

On 3/6/2021 at 11:00 PM, UK_Knight said:

In BDSM we talk a lot about our acceptance of our kinks and our general acceptance of changed roles.

I saw tonight (on other groups) the following ads...

"Domineering goddess, I am looking for a sub ready to submit fully in his daily life in order to be worthy of the time I grant him. Be ready to be mine, and obey me little slut."

"your aim and goal in life must be to satisfy my pleasure and wants. you must always worship me, respect and obey me with no questioning my orders or my sovereignty. i don’t want no stubborn or adamant individual who is just looking to fuck all in disguise, no time wasters, you must know your place as a miserable slave and what you want , which is my total domination. "

 

It got me thinking, if the same ads were posted by male doms instead of female would we be so accepting of them?

Is this a supply and demand kink, what drives it, the lack of good female doms or the surplus of male subs?

Is the language driven by the women or the men?

 

Reads a bit like it was written by either a Male scammer or someone who has an image of D/s as a sexualised fantasy to use language of many Dominant ladies , I have come across.

Being shackled 24/7 does become a bit tedious.