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BDSM and Trauma


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Navigating relatively new CPTSD diagnosis in part triggered by my poly partner’s disclosure of CSA. Has really affected me and us. Transference has been a major factor. Getting a lot of ther@peutic and other support to navigate it. Makes the kink stuff between us and solo murky to navigate.

Definitely a trauma response for me. Ive Taken time to learn how to use kink healthily. Im done shaming myself for liking something just because it was born from something negative. It’s a line, for sure, but I feel like kink allows me to express some feelings I’ll probably carry forever, despite therapy, in a safe and judgment-free environment. The right partner is key.

  • 2 weeks later...
he****

I took a lot of *** from my mother growing up. Finding out I enjoy *** in the bedroom was a bit of a light bulb moment. Being able to stop it was mind altering. Learning how to concentrate through it brought me to a very high level of discipline.

Re****

I agree with this perspective which unfortunately makes it difficult for me to enjoy the kinks I once enjoyed. I have always shared your perspective but did not sit with it and spend time resolving my thoughts until later in life. I agree we can't control our desires, but we can heal. So I find it difficult to enjoy kink because I often think about helping people resolve and heal instead of feed the addiction and desire in avoidance of sitting with the ***. I myself of course have kinks and struggle with this.

ko****

NARM could be a proofen second approach. To solve „depper rooted“ issues like childhood developmental trauma

vo****

Honestly I feel like it’s a positive way for me to take back control.

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