xR**** Posted August 7 Author 15 hours ago, port-charlotte192146 said: Sounds to me like you need some mental health. The fact that you didn't try to avoid the truck and left it up to chance. Not good. You need some real friends in your life to talk to. If you don't have any seek some help .I'm totally guessing here, but I would say you are suffering from depression. Get some help. It will change your world for the best. š Not relevant to the discussion at all. š
Deleted Member Posted August 9 I would look into the act of people pleasing. My friend is like this and it's so hard on her mental health.
Un**** Posted August 10 You just need to be you , your dynamic partner once found will, should understand you, all of you. Once you've become comfortable together & open up try to take the role as a switch, slowly you will find your confidence to then take full control of your actions or inactions. Ā
xR**** Posted August 10 Author 3 hours ago, Unlocking said: You just need to be you , your dynamic partner once found will, should understand you, all of you. Once you've become comfortable together & open up try to take the role as a switch, slowly you will find your confidence to then take full control of your actions or inactions. Ā I don't know. I hate topping. I have done it before. It's boring to me. š¤·āāļø It's not freeing, it's not relaxing. The only part I liked was the setup, the initial foreplay. Outside of that? Nah.
sl**** Posted August 16 I found consistency is the key to helping people understand that they are accepted and to know they are enough acknowledge the apology and remind them it's unnecessary we are all human
Go**** Posted August 20 Are you Canadian? Iāve noticed we do that a lot up here in Canadaā¦ I stopped. And I reword apologies to āI apologizeā instead of āIām sorryā. I learned this lesson years ago in the pressure cooker environment that is a very busy fine fi it restaurants kitchen. My chef used to just tear us all a new one whenever weād say āIām sorryā for making a mistakeā¦ āDONāT BE SORRY MY BOY, JUST DINT F@@CKING nbsp;DO IT AGAINā For years I thought he was a huge a**hole; then one day I realized he was teaching me one of the most important lessons of my life. He was trying to help us learn how to live our lives and show up in a manner which we werenāt having to constantly apologize for. He was teaching us how to stand tall and be skillful and professional and hit the bullseyes in life. I always tell people this when they say theyāre sorry unnecessarily āsave your apologies, you donāt need one today; one day you may need them - and theyāll be worth more if you save them for when you need them.ā This was a great post, Thanks for sharing, Glad youāre safe.
Sa**** Posted August 30 I also do this. I spiral and say sorry for literally anything. Because I'm terrified that i will offend or upset people. But it places a burden on my friends. And also on apps like this and online dating it massively puts people off i think. I dont really know what to do about it tbh.
Deleted Member Posted September 3 Sick of saying sorry sick of trying might be smiling but inside I'm dying
To**** Posted September 4 You donāt fix someoneās apologizing by telling them to stop. Thereās always something under it..*** of being too much, of wearing people out Iām not going to punish her for saying sorry, that just buries it deeper. I want to know what sheās actually apologizing for Best thing I can do is stay steady and show her, again and again, that a hard moment doesnāt make her a problem But what you told me in the car is bigger than something a partner can carry alone. She needs more than I can give her in the moment You donāt talk someone into feeling safe. You prove it, every time, until it actually landsā¦
Ye**** Posted September 6 This is me. I will get in my head and I will compare one man to a past man who hurt me. Then I spend hours questioning everything trying to find a reason that I upset someone over. So I learned to just apologize for everything to matter who fault it is or how big of an issue it is. I also have learned to just say itās fine and I am fine to avoid being the problem. For me it comes from dating some really mentally abusive and very manipulative people. The biggest is when someone goes hours without talking to me I spiral but not because I feel they should talk to me 24/7 but because Iām sorry I did something to annoy them when I didnāt mean to.
xR**** Posted yesterday at 06:19 AM Author September 6, YellowSub93 said: This is me. I will get in my head and I will compare one man to a past man who hurt me. Then I spend hours questioning everything trying to find a reason that I upset someone over. So I learned to just apologize for everything to matter who fault it is or how big of an issue it is. I also have learned to just say itās fine and I am fine to avoid being the problem. For me it comes from dating some really mentally abusive and very manipulative people. The biggest is when someone goes hours without talking to me I spiral but not because I feel they should talk to me 24/7 but because Iām sorry I did something to annoy them when I didnāt mean to. I get like this, too, honestly. My mind HATES silence. It's been weaponized against me. I know this. That doesn't make it easier. So, there was this person I was hoping to date, but she would spend days or weeks before ever responding to me. The first two times, all I could think about was what I did wrong, what I could do to fix it, how annoying I was just cause I wanted to talk to them. The third time, I just had to suck it up and delete everything. My mind couldn't handle that over and over.
Mi**** Posted yesterday at 02:47 PM I wouldn't worry about it. Over time you will figure things out. Plus, what most people think doesn't matter.
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