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i’ve for sure met black subs, but it is much harder to find, it’s also hard to find a masculine man who’s also a sub :/

As a Bkack woman on here there are not many Black men to begin with in my area. But I do wonder about the statics ig who is more willing to be a sub. Now no one group is a monolith. But I couldn’t help but wonder as your question poses, where are the male Black identifying subs?

Not to get too political or socially aware but maybe it’s because black men have been treated so poorly for so long that’s it just isn’t a part of their daily life to feel comfortable enough to let their guard down. Being a sub means total trust yea? As a marginalized group that is constantly seen as a problem, I can’t think of anyone who has the right to be less trusting. Just my two cents from a white guy that grew up in a black neighborhood.

3 minutes ago, Girl6Knicks said:

As a Bkack woman on here there are not many Black men to begin with in my area. But I do wonder about the statics ig who is more willing to be a sub. Now no one group is a monolith. But I couldn’t help but wonder as your question poses, where are the male Black identifying subs?

I also wonder if most of the Black men on here identify with the racial sexual stereotype and would rather play into that. I met one male Black sub so far and many others who were non-Black. So I do wonder if playing into the whole “BBC” thing makes these Black men who identify that way seem more desired. If so I say yikes. But great discussion!

3 minutes ago, ChefEvan said:

Not to get too political or socially aware but maybe it’s because black men have been treated so poorly for so long that’s it just isn’t a part of their daily life to feel comfortable enough to let their guard down. Being a sub means total trust yea? As a marginalized group that is constantly seen as a problem, I can’t think of anyone who has the right to be less trusting. Just my two cents from a white guy that grew up in a black neighborhood.

Race and sex are political and historical so you bring up a good point in your response. Dehumanization makes it harder for trust and be ***.

I also think the kink space for Black people in general is not very inclusive unless you are in a heavily Black or POC area.

7 minutes ago, Girl6Knicks said:

As a Bkack woman on here there are not many Black men to begin with in my area. But I do wonder about the statics ig who is more willing to be a sub. Now no one group is a monolith. But I couldn’t help but wonder as your question poses, where are the male Black identifying subs?

*Black

7 minutes ago, Girl6Knicks said:

I also think the kink space for Black people in general is not very inclusive unless you are in a heavily Black or POC area.

You bring up a good point. Our area is mostly white which isn't necessarily a problem, but it does shape our interactions with others given we tend to prefer POC and submissive folks. We end up interacting with a lot of white men specifically, and we've always assumed that the sight of a couple who are both masculine in appearance (most of the time) skeeves people out or at the very least makes them more cautious. Something to think about.

The two races that are hard to find submissive is black guys and Latino i been in the kink scene since 2015 and yeah those are harder to find

Speaking solely on myself here… for me it isn’t necessarily giving up control in a moment. It’s the idea of occupying a role where yielding to someone else’s direction is itself part of the appeal. I naturally lean toward being the person shaping the interaction, so submission feels less instinctive and more like being asked to enjoy the part of the dynamic I’m usually drawn to providing.

As a sub myself I guess in a lot of black culture, at least in the UK, black male identity can be wrapped up in conventional masculinity and being submissive doesn’t fit the stereotype. I find most women when the see a black guy, imagine them taking control and being dominant. Most of the women who visit my profile on here are seemingly expecting something else and end up disappointed. I’ve been to quite a few play parties over the years and rarely see any people of colour and definitely not any other black male subs.

Leaving comment because I am invested in this too.

I rarely have the fortune of finding local black men who are submissive. Or at least to closely align with the type of relationship I am seeking for long term. I know they exist obviously just very sad that its so rare to come across.

I would say there are several factors when it comes to this. I would say it might be the image of the BBC that is popular these days. But I think it also has to do with comfort levels. I had a switch friend who completely converted a black male Dom into a sub. She saw something in him that most overlooked and coaxed it out. She rooted herself so deeply in his mind all he could think about was serving and pleasing her. She always had a way with words and making people feel comfortable in their own skin. She was not a fin Domme or anything like that. She just genuinely cared for him and let him “bloom” as she always put it.

I think it's deeply rooted in our history. Most black men never want to be seen as anything other than strong. It's also the *** of having it thrown back in your face, and if it ever got out that you were God help the roasting you would receive.

1 hour ago, Longbrown said:

Ummmm, slavery could be a huge factor...? 🤦🏾‍♂️

I don't disagree that the trauma and connotations are still there. I do always feel like that is always going to be a factor though. Especially since I always see race fetishizing black men as a bull which also has mandingo connotations to slavery.

There is a difference between offering someone Submission because you trust the person to be "in control" vs being used as an object for sexual gratification. I think giving some room to talk about how both of those impact kink in black spaces deserve a platform to fully be discussed.

I've found that there are also very few female subs (though more than men) and of those more prefer a Black Dom over a White.

The white men in this thread centering themselves and their totally irrelevant likes and wants is pretty gross behavior. Unfortunately, I'm not surprised to see it though still disgusted. 

I’ve been in relationships with several black female submissives. They’ve said that black men who are into polyamory, and straight black submissive men, are rare in their experience. One reason is that black male submission skates close to slavery days; many black women, too, find the idea of being tied up repulsive even if they are submissive.

I’m a switch if this counts, but along with @@Rainydaye nbsp;and @BLHV are right on point with their perspectives that align with my views

To be honest I have found very few people of color male or female that are in to this life and I have been in it since I was 16 and now I am 55 and still in it and the ones I have found are all Doms

alot of them serve white dommes! a few black “submissives” approach always try to “turn me out” to make me serve them which always confuse me. I know its not rare because i see many black dommes with black submissives which so healing to see!

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