Black subs ?

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58 minutes ago, Daddybrains said:

I’ve been in relationships with several black female submissives. They’ve said that black men who are into polyamory, and straight black submissive men, are rare in their experience. One reason is that black male submission skates close to slavery days; many black women, too, find the idea of being tied up repulsive even if they are submissive.

thats why black bdsm matters and can be healing we understand each other experiences so submission can look different in black bdsm

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3 hours ago, BLHV said:

I think it's deeply rooted in our history. Most black men never want to be seen as anything other than strong. It's also the *** of having it thrown back in your face, and if it ever got out that you were God help the roasting you would receive.

do you think the experience will be different if a black submissive served a black domme or goddess?

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4 hours ago, D3viantJ said:

As a sub myself I guess in a lot of black culture, at least in the UK, black male identity can be wrapped up in conventional masculinity and being submissive doesn’t fit the stereotype. I find most women when the see a black guy, imagine them taking control and being dominant. Most of the women who visit my profile on here are seemingly expecting something else and end up disappointed. I’ve been to quite a few play parties over the years and rarely see any people of colour and definitely not any other black male subs.

question would you serve a black domme or goddess?

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5 hours ago, ChefEvan said:

Not to get too political or socially aware but maybe it’s because black men have been treated so poorly for so long that’s it just isn’t a part of their daily life to feel comfortable enough to let their guard down. Being a sub means total trust yea? As a marginalized group that is constantly seen as a problem, I can’t think of anyone who has the right to be less trusting. Just my two cents from a white guy that grew up in a black neighborhood.

that being said isn’t it possible to find that trust and safety in a black Domme or goddess who understands their experience socially and historically!

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4 hours ago, Longbrown said:

Ummmm, slavery could be a huge factor...? 🤦🏾‍♂️

I understand this point as a black mistress I understand the experience black men go through so being submissive to a black domme may feel like a different experience.

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5 hours ago, babycassiexx said:

i’ve for sure met black subs, but it is much harder to find, it’s also hard to find a masculine man who’s also a sub :/

we do exist

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1 hour ago, prettyvisage888 said:

question would you serve a black domme or goddess?

Yeah I think so. In my experience, the few black dommes I’ve met at events they tend to end up with white subs for whatever reason. I think if I were to meet someone it would have to be at a femdom specific event and I haven’t made it to one yet. But I guess there’s something there about feeling judged by a black woman as a sub that I can’t really explain. I feel like there’s a lot to unpack with black people of any sexuality in kink spaces if I’m honest. I feel like most women want something very specific from black men which a lot of people have mentioned already. Definitely an interesting conversation I’m not sure there’s an obvious answer to.

[An****]

I'm open to it 😇

[fe****]

I’ve never seen a black male sub. They’re always talking about how a woman needs to be submissive smh.

[Mr****]

The biggest kink/ reason that draws people to BDSM is the exchange of power. Usually most male subs hold some kind of powerful position rather it’s with work or social status. Hence why there are very few black males. Black men walk and live on egg shells in their everyday lives…..the image of the black male in society is is a lot of cases is already being degraded……we already have to submit to the world just to stay alive…….in BDSM is where we can put the down and live in the power we want to possess…..where we have the control and can be desired like we want……this is just my opinion…..but the proof to me is in the roles of men in this community……most black men are doms…..a lot of white men are subs……exchange of power…..

[ey****]

I've found a lot can vary on territory.  So locally the scene in general is quite caucasian - but if you go to London it's a lot more diverse.

I feel there's a lot of different factors at play which maybe doesn't have people come so forward : but a big question is on how welcome the scene, website, etc are on diversity in general - and, of course, how safe people feel in communicating what they're into.

There are caucasian pro dommes I know (locally and not) who do get a lot of subs contact them for what amounts to race play, and so for some there can be the shame, stigma, and so on of being into it.  Not, of course that anyone not-white is automatically into it, not implying that at all.   But.... there can also be those into submission who might still feel it's a form of that which they don't want 

[Do****]

There are black male submissives on this app but they don't always come out and identify right away. Some don't really understand how the dynamics work and just choose Dom. Once you have a conversation and start asking more probing questions, trust is built, etc etc they will reveal their submissive nature.

[TheZenCommander]

They exist. And I think you have brought up a great perspective in your question. Many folks don't consider power differential of color. (It's exactly why I absolutely won't take on some male subs that approach me.) I think there are some amazing insights here. So, thank you for starting this thread.

[Ep****]

My bestie I've known since I was 13 in middle school has lived a life where he told me once when I was in the car with him while he was being pulled over that he was happy that I was there - at the time I laughed it off, surely it was a joke, we live in better times right? The last 10 years have shown we really don't.

My personal opinion and point behind that story is it's likely linked to conditions of community - especially systemic racism if you're in the US. If someone spends their entire life getting f*cked by systems of control they're far less likely to feel safe giving up the control they have sc***d, clawed, and fought to have.

[Deleted Member]

You couldn't be more ignorant... Why would black men wanna role play their *** history... Hmmm I wonder

[ba****]

A lot of Pale People answering for BLACK Men and it doesn't sit right with me. Ironically that's also your answer. Why tf would we want to be submissive to our literal Oppressors.

[Th****]

3 hours ago, ban-barber49423 said:

A lot of Pale People answering for BLACK Men and it doesn't sit right with me. Ironically that's also your answer. Why tf would we want to be submissive to our literal Oppressors.

While I agree with the first part of this, and even commented on it myself the second half doesn't hold up to the fact that the OP is a black woman and the fact that black dom women exist. 

[sa****]

I am a black sub, with strong g oral fixation.

[ba****]

17 hours ago, ThaliaV said:

While I agree with the first part of this, and even commented on it myself the second half doesn't hold up to the fact that the OP is a black woman and the fact that black dom women exist. 

When you have mixed people depending on how they were raised they will act just like the oppressor that they have been raised by so it is just the same.

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Yesterday at 02:36 AM, D3viantJ said:

Yeah I think so. In my experience, the few black dommes I’ve met at events they tend to end up with white subs for whatever reason. I think if I were to meet someone it would have to be at a femdom specific event and I haven’t made it to one yet. But I guess there’s something there about feeling judged by a black woman as a sub that I can’t really explain. I feel like there’s a lot to unpack with black people of any sexuality in kink spaces if I’m honest. I feel like most women want something very specific from black men which a lot of people have mentioned already. Definitely an interesting conversation I’m not sure there’s an obvious answer to.

thank you for sharing xo