It's extremely common and normal for a man of your age to have an uptick in libido. Unfortunately this is very common in patients with alzheimers and dementia. Not saying you're on that track, just saying this is why I know it's common. So it's not bad, it's very normal and your fetishes are Read more… also very common and normal. As suggested above, you'd have a much better experience to just hire a ProDomme. On fetlife you should be able to find some for hire online or even at a dungeon near you. Because as also clarified above, your situation doesn't lend to open exploration with someone who's looking for a fully committed submissive. You're wanting your needs to be met, not to meet the needs of your Domme. This isn't submission, this is just kink. This is something that should come with compensation for their time and efforts. You'll be much happier with a clear agreement. And you're just not likely to find this here without getting scammed.

It doesn't need to be aligned as long as it's respected. If your boundary isn't respected, if there's push back, that's c@ercion, which is not consent. This is a much bigger issue and indicates not just incompatibility, but lack of safety. And it's better to walk away than to question your own Read more… boundaries.

As a Domme that takes both irl and virtual subs. There's plenty to offer from a distance, it just looks different. But most of the guys here are hoping you'll tell them what to do with their joystick. Bc they don't realize they often fall for men who are pretending to be women, and that's often Read more… what guys who trick guys want to see right away. Women tend to be a lot more subtle about this.

But to answer your question.... dynamics from afar can offer fantasy scenario, yes office type tasks, etc but for me I generally have them make daily offerings of poetry or music or something that I like to receive that gives me an emotional boost in my day. That's the key from afar, how can they feed your ego? And then yes, virtual sessions are possible with enough creativity. I can't give away alllllll my secrets. But, for those that are eager but living in areas without access to this community in their town, online dynamics can be quite satisfying. Better than nothing, for sure.

Most of our arousal happens in the mind. You're really missing out on the best stuff if you overlook that.

It's important for any newbie on either side of the D/s slash to understand that under all the spicy fun, we're all still human. Subs are not toys without feelings and Dominants are not endless kink dispensers. Both sides are in it to get some sort of needs met.

:1775377043,5348705, Been looking for Year nothing

Maybe you're not looking in the right places. We do exist.

:1773892940,1570019, Honestly I have never met a dominant woman in life. However I was able to... I want to say "convince" but that feels bad... I'll just anecdote drop

I told her I am a weirdo and mentioned massaging feet, sucking on toes, and a strong desire to have a woman Read more… kick me in the balls many many times.

She said her feet were to ticklish for a massage, and probably toe sucking as well. As for the kicking in the balls she basically said she couldn't do that.

Regardless we kept talking. We took our hour lunch at the same time, and drove to a nearby empty parking lot (overnight shift) and she let me try and massage her feet in the back seat of the car. As it turns out I love giving foot massages and have even been told my massages are magical so she found she really liked it even letting me remove her socks to continue after not being tickled even slightly.

With that I asked if maybe now she would try having her toes sucked for the first time and she agreed. Turns out she absolutely loved the feeling and was highly surprised by that.

While massaging and toe sucking and talking I explained more about kicking my balls and how I didn't expect her to just come out full on power kicking, I wanted her to be comfortable at all time throughout and move at her own pace. I suggested just putting her foot between my legs, poke around, add a little pressure, just do whatever she was comfortable doing as she grew more comfortable with it. She poked and pressed and really didn't get anything until she asked me and I moved her foot so her front pad rested on top of my balls and she gently pushed down a bit. Then lunch was over.

A few days later she stops by my house after work before heading home. It ends up with her sitting in my computer chair and me on my knees, legs spread. She gives gentle tap of a kicks now more comfortable but still completely unsure about this. I don't remember how buy I got her to take her pants off and allow me to make her orgasm. (Suprise she says its basically impossible for her)
Regardless her still in chair i begin orally pleasing her risen up on my knees a bit I feel her foot kick my balls harder than she has yet to do, causing me to lean forward slightly into her and lick faster and harder like I was a horse she had just spurred into action. 10 minutes but I made her orgasm to her surprise again and she had kicked my balls pretty decently hard and multiple times.

She would later kick me until I was covering and closing my legs only for her to push them apart and pull my hands away for more. Which I had mentioned to her before and she did it on her own one night.

She actually found all of it fun and had never considered any of these things. Even being a unsure about even doing them once brought up to her. Simply by me expressing my desire for them but not pushing her, easing her into the more intense parts, reassuring her and making sure she was comfortable in everything she did as she discovered something new at her own pace.

Basically expecting a dominant woman to just appear is a bit crazy to me. You are better off just dating people, eventually explaining what you like, why you like it, and that you would love for them to do them. Then don't push and pester them to do it. Still talk about it but don't be overbearing.

As long as they don't say absolutely not, never happening, though in my experience when they say that they usually don't stay much longer anyways, hopefully the person you are dating has an open mind, wants to do something that will please you, and finds that theu actually really enjoy this thing you introduced them to and would never have known otherwise. I've had it happen a few times and im an extreme introvert hermit master that hasn't dated a ton, so if I can so can you.

TL;DR: Don't expect to find a dominant woman, go introduce some women to femdom. Most don't know they like it and never even tried it out.


Some of us are quite sure of who we are and what we like.

Help! I can't find #12. I have every other one this time, for the first time ever.

Look for tending the garden on ig. Lots of great survivor resources there.