Loving size comparison: does aftercare turn it into attachment, or does it just hurt?

[Castlebaby]

I keep seeing size comparison and SPH framed as cruel, mocking, one-note. I’m more interested in the other version: comparison that is explicit and a bit dark, but still caring, and then the scene does not end on the ***.
The shape I mean is roughly this. A woman compares her partner to other men, including penis size, either talking about it or in a real situation. It is not her laughing at him or treating him like a joke. It is her looking straight at the most exposed, insecure part of him. After that, she stays. He is allowed to drop, even cry. They hold each other. They have sex that is close, not punitive. Some people say that sequence made them feel more chosen, not less.
I want to hear from people who have actually done something like this, on either side.
Did the closeness after the comparison make the bond stronger, or did the comparison sit in the body for days and poison it?
What separated “loving and psychological” from “just cruel with a hug taped on at the end”?
If you were the person doing the comparing, did it make you more into him afterward, or did it flatten the attraction?
If you were the one being compared, what did you need right after in order for it to feel like intimacy instead of a wound?
Experiences, not s***ches. I’m trying to understand if that arc is something people have lived, or if it only works as a story.

[sn****]

Some men enjoy it, others dont. Read the room i guess. Maybe talk to your partner about talking about that kind of thing before just jumping into it.

[Castlebaby]

13 minutes ago, sneakyimpulse said:

Some men enjoy it, others dont. Read the room i guess. Maybe talk to your partner about talking about that kind of thing before just jumping into it.

If I had one I would 😉

[Fe****]

He talks about his size more than I ever have or ever will, but he does enjoy when I'm playing with it, talking about how cute it is, and telling him that I'm gonna invite someone over to stretch me out so he can get sloppy seconds. It definitely works for us.
To be fair, we've discussed it at length. I'm no stranger to degrading and he's been degraded before, but we still talked about where that insecurity lies and how far I can take it before it starts to feel cruel. His limit is different than others I've been with, but talking about it openly is the best way to get comfortable with it.

[Ma****]

I also wonder what the more well endowed male gets out of this scenario unless he’s getting off in a cuck sense during the passionate love making between the smaller man and the comparing partner. Anyone have any thoughts on this?