Curious about ***d bi and do women like this

[Ad****]

What's the difference between liking and desiring ?

[LadyV]

Speaking as a Dominant woman who actually IS bisexual, I find "***d bi" kinks, particularly done with *** as the goal, to be kinda insulting to my actual sexuality. It feels a bit like a cishet man is wearing an insulting costume of my actual sexuality (or my actual gender in the case of the sissy fetishists) to humiliate and degrade himself. Like using a core aspect of my identity as a *** tool for himself. That's shitty to me. 

 

Don't get me wrong, I'm very supportive of men exploring their sexuality in an authentic and joyful way without all the toxic masculine homophobic bullshit that gets constantly heaped on men. I'm 100% down to date and play with bisexual and pansexual dudes. But that isn't a kink in that context, that's just those dude's honest sexuality. 

 

But when you take it to a *** and degrading fetishized place? Well, I can't help but feel as an actual bisexual person that you're making my real sexuality out to be a humiliating or degrading thing. "***d bi" just smacks of the fetishization of bisexual people, internalized-homophobia that you gotta work out in yourself, and too much unexamined biphobic bullshit for me. I don't feel comfortable being around that. 

 

It also doesn't help that I've had cishet men use "***d bi" kinks in an attempt to side step my boundaries against dating cishet men. Like...no...having a "***d bi" kink does not give you a loophole around my boundaries. 😒