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Any advice for a shysub/pet?


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Hejhej ^^

I wana know  if anyone has some tips for me trying to go to a fetishparty/event but they have a dresscode

never been to one before because i'm really shy and insecure,ESPECIALLY alone at one of those events.
they pretty much allow (i think) everything except street clothes and something called wetlook(not sure what that is yet)
is there anything a shy like me can wear and feel comfortable ?
i allready saw they allow venetian masks (and i found a really cute one)
but that just covers my head part but the rest of my body still needs some help >///< (oh gosh waah shy)

thank you for anyone reading this and trying to help this *** little >p<;;

Contact the organisers & ask them what their dress code is specifically, what you can or can't wear, as no-one can tell you the dress code for a specific munch or event, without knowing that munch or event personally.
yunyun, firstly congratulations for deciding to go to an event like this on your own.
There are a few things that I would advise you to do or remember at least.

Firstly, the comments by others about reaching out to the event organisers is ESSENTIAL !!.
You have questions, which is good, but you should also make sure they know you are a complete novice to these kinds of events, and that way, they will be able to advice as help you - but also keep an eye on you while you are there hopefully too.
Properly run events are 99.99% safe for all. The attendees are usually experienced, have been vetted and are known to the organisers, which allows newbies to relax and absorb/enjoy the environment.

Wetlook clothing has been a high street fashion staple again for many years. It’s is predominantly a glossy, stretch fabric which is artificial - so not leather or latex. The kind of things that black, shiny ‘jeggings’ and suchlike are made of.
As a rule, it doesn’t stand up well to intense play. The stitching comes apart with very little effort when playing even a little bit rough… and there is some question as to whether or not some lubes react with the material and skin - so in a hot playroom, possibly not the best choice of clothing.

Never be afraid to ask questions at Clubs or parties. Most people will be happy to guide you. The exception here is speaking to someone while they are actively involved in a play scenario. Doms would find it disrespectful for their session with a sub to be interrupted. And likewise, a sub would not benefit from being interrogated whilst in the “zone” so to speak.

A Venetian mask (if allowed) would be a good idea. It will afford you a degree of anonymity - and the inner comfort derived from that.

Do you have in your wardrobe, play clothing that you prefer to wear ?…
I would start looking at that. Something that makes you feel comfortable / takes you into your play headspace / empowers you is a good starting point.

Once you have found something, you then should check with the organisers that it is ok to wear for the event.

I hope that all makes sense, and is helpful. If you would like any specific advice, feel free to message me. I will always help if I can.

Good luck on your journey …


"Wet look" generally means shiny (or wet-looking).  I was a little surprised to see that this is not allowed because that would cut out latex and other classical kink wear.

So I turned to the fount of all knowledge, internet, and looked up specifically the kink-meaning of wet look.  What came up were references to actual wet clothes and sploosh.  Perfectly understandable that the organizers of the even wouldn't want people dripping in the venue.

But I also noticed that somebody has replied with an alternate kink-meaning of wet look.

So this is definitely something that you want to contact the organizer and have them clarify.


The mask should take care of the shyness unless you have other identifying features (tattoos, etc) that you want to cover.  Nothing wrong with wanting to remain anonymous, especially when meeting with strangers.


I think the one consideration I haven't seen mentioned is how are you planning on participating? If you're just going to observe and meet people then it doesn't matter so much what you wear - maybe think of what parts of kink interest you most and try to reflect that.  If there are activities you would like to participate in then research them and try to dress in a manner that would fit the activity.

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