BIG/little dynamics?

[Qu****]

I have a friend who says I'm "little-like" because there's a predominant part of my being that, "really enjoys doing the sorts of things littles do in little space", and that I, "crave the sorts attention a BIG/Caregiver sort would provide."

When I asked what that meant, I got a pat on the head and told, "Aww kitten, you'll figure it out." But I haven't and up until a few days ago was bopping along thinking that was just a way of describing a particular sub type's personality, not an actual role one might assume for a bit.

So my questions are:
Is there really a Kink, Fetish or Sexual component to a B/l dynamic that's tied into BDSM?

What does that look like? Or play out like? What are some of the things people do? and, Where are the lines, if any?

side note: I asked in the chat if there was a way to search for prior threads on a subject and was told there isn't. So if you've ever commented on this topic before, and are able to share a link to where those comments are, those could be really helpful too (but no outside links - they said those aren't okay on here).

Thanks all ~ ♡

[FETMOD-TF]

2 hours ago, Quixy said:

side note: I asked in the chat if there was a way to search for prior threads on a subject and was told there isn't. So if you've ever commented on this topic before, and are able to share a link to where those comments are, those could be really helpful too (but no outside links - they said those aren't okay on here).
 

To help you out with further searches in the future, if you sign onto the website version of the site via your phone browser using www.fetish.com you will be able to search the forum for topics of interest.  

On the Mobile Desktop version of the site, you will find the search function under the Browse heading which you can access by tapping on your profile photo in the top right hand corner of the screen. 

On the Desktop version via a laptop, pc or tablet, head straight to the forum and there is a search function at the top of the forum page.

[ny****]

Think of cg/l as a type of subset within the dynamics of D/s. Typically the little is submissive and does enjoy the activities associated with little space as they make her feel safe and cared for. For some littles, sexual play is not separate from littlespace and others it is. In all of my cg/l relationships; bdsm was something I shared with them as a teacher and mentor. I always explained it to them that it was my role to present a safe space for them to explore their little side and any sexual fantasies without ever fearing being judged, in a safe supportive environment.

[Ba****]

My littlespace is absolutely not sexual. At all. I technically age regress, different than ddlb but similar kinda, but I use it as a therapy. Littlespace can be for whatever you need it be. Even if others say it has to be done a certain way, it doesn't.
Look into different little things to do while in littlespace and find what you think will work for you. Experiment with it. If you don't like a certain thing others are doing, try something else. I like to color, draw, play, whatever else while in littlespace. Others like to do different things.

[Deleted Member]

See I have started to think something similar about myself, I have a child like mentality to a lot of things and have a lot of elements that I feel would be considered "little like" but I don't consider them sexual and in fact have a different mentality in the bedroom. I think I do those things as a lifestyle choice/coping mechanism more than a kink. Though it's something I'm also looking into.

[Deleted Member]

Well firstly that head pat sounds extremely patronising. If this person is familiar with dynamics like that then it would me more helpful for them to help advise and explain what they can of these aspects. Pointing out something they’ve spotted and then just lesving you to try and figure out what that means is incredibly unhelpful.

Unfortunately with advice on topics like this it comes down to individual needs, these dynamics are entirely different for everyone so theres not a checklist as such you can refer to to help work it out, its purely down to your own needs and how you are as a person.

As a caregiver myself, my suggestion would be to research roles and see what you find yourself drawn to or compatible with, first and foremost i would suggest taking a look at these aspects of yourself that this person has pointed out and thinking about what they mean to you, is it a headspace you find yourself in or is it who you are naturally? There is no wrong answer here so dont put too much pressure on yourself to label it, it can be either a personality trait or a role, or both!
If taking on a role like this within a sexual element it comes down to finding out what that looks like, how it presents itself and what you would need from a partner while in that role.

[Mi****]

4 hours ago, TheHandThatFeeds said:

Well firstly that head pat sounds extremely patronising. If this person is familiar with dynamics like that then it would me more helpful for them to help advise and explain what they can of these aspects. Pointing out something they’ve spotted and then just lesving you to try and figure out what that means is incredibly unhelpful.

Unfortunately with advice on topics like this it comes down to individual needs, these dynamics are entirely different for everyone so theres not a checklist as such you can refer to to help work it out, its purely down to your own needs and how you are as a person.

As a caregiver myself, my suggestion would be to research roles and see what you find yourself drawn to or compatible with, first and foremost i would suggest taking a look at these aspects of yourself that this person has pointed out and thinking about what they mean to you, is it a headspace you find yourself in or is it who you are naturally? There is no wrong answer here so dont put too much pressure on yourself to label it, it can be either a personality trait or a role, or both!
If taking on a role like this within a sexual element it comes down to finding out what that looks like, how it presents itself and what you would need from a partner while in that role.

Agreed with this, it's down to tailoring according to your needs. Is this something that embodies a part of yourself you want to bring out or a role to play at certain times, sexual or non-sexual or both, and after the second decision it consists of deciding what kinks and acts (if sexual) or activites (if non-sexual) you would like to do in the care of your caregiver/Big. Best to think on the first two and then find a list of appropriate things you want to do;
Then either discuss them with your Big, or if you don't have one, find one that would like to support and nurture you as you do them 😄

[ke****]

There are a few FB groups dedicated to Daddy, Mummy, little and middle kink but be careful of the wannabes most of them have pretty good admins who will kick anyone breaking the rules