How does everyone feel about jealousy?

[Ka****]

I often say that I don't like to share my toys. I never have. But it's not so simple. I could claim that it's due to being a scorpio, and we're naturally jealous and guarding our partners. But it's also a low vibration energy. If your connection is strong you can evolve to be less jealous over time. Depends on the people involved in the dynamic and the respect level

[AG****]

Only jealous when I asked you not to do it

[AG****]

Or but when I'm stuck at my house for the 6 months while you get to go out on days that'll make me jealous

[sh****]

I'm not jealous I'm territorial I watch over and protect what's mine I look out and keep safe my submissive as I do my friends and family she is my solace my pleasure demon and I am her alpha wolf and no apologies for it, I'm the one they will answer to if they disrespect her or her boundaries or are dynamic

[Deleted Member]

On 9/17/2022 at 2:01 AM, makeMeslut said:

Is jealousy a bad thing? Is this taught through culture or is it natural (for some but not for others)? Should we pursue to be more open to non monogamous relationships?

That's 2 separate things. 

 

Being jealous is a natural human behaviour the trick is to talk to your partner about what and why made you feel this way.

I  can get jealous of alot of different things which is fine as long as I don't do or behave stupid because of it.

Some people get jealous seeing there partner talking with someone the same gender as themselves.s

So partners might use this in a playful manner to invoke you to storm over in a jealous rage to assert that partner is yours.

Whilst this can be a hurtful thing to do another person as its playing with someone else's emotions to me, others see this as simple playful behaviour.

 

Always try to talk with your partner about how things effect you or make you feel as a partner should try there best to help you feel appreciated and cared for. That being said watch out for those who try to use it manipulating you as then it's time to walk away. 

 

Being open to a non monogamous relationship is only something you can decide on if it's a fit for you.

I personally prefer 1on1 relationship but for the right situation I am open to 2on1 relationship as long as its this from the start.

The heart and emotions are not toys for others to play with instead they should instead be doing there best to nurture and protect them

 

That's my view on the 2 questions asked hope another person's view helps 

[KY****]

The jealousy vs territorial is a good view point

[Sp****]

I’ve dated sex workers before and had open relationships.
May jealous just means something different to me.
With sex workers , sex is their work. If they worked at a bakery I wouldn’t be jealous of them baking or selling others cookies or bread. They’re doing sex as part of their job. But a healthy person and healthy performance means you can’t separate all emotion from sex. Especially if it’s actually, good sex. So while most would say as long as you don’t love them it’s ok, there are going to be talent they feel strongly for. There is talent they care about and can grow to love even if they don’t want to. My boundary is, be honest with me about your feelings.
I’m not hurt by you having sex with others, nor by you loving others. But if I see something between you or especially from you towards them that you won’t tell me about, then we both know your heart moved on from me. Now you’re staying from guilt.
Same with open sex relationship or even polyamorous. ( multiple emotional partners, not just sexual). If you can’t tell me the truth, if you’re lying, then you know. People lie when they feel they are doing something wrong or don’t care about you.
But that’s not jealous, that’s trust.
Now, like most people, I desire a monogamous relationship. But I don’t believe in monogamy.
To me, monogamy is treating a person as property to be owned. ( yeah, some kink is into that) and that fine for role playing.
I prefer to win my partners submission by earning their trust and respect.
Polyamory gives a competitiveness that can enrich a relationship. Instead of being jealous of my partner wanting to be with someone for something they aren’t getting from me, talk about what they are getting or feeling that I am not providing. Then I can decide if I will make the effort to fulfill that desire.
To me, a person should go which ever way makes them the happiest. If I’m not willing to work harder to please them, that’s on me. Not my partner. Not the other person who is willing to make the greater effort.
But I don’t play second. You don’t get them and me. If you leave…. Or are spending more time, emotion, energy…. with them, understand you lose everything I provide.
But I don’t get jealous.
I get jealous when someone gets a raise I fought for and know I put in more work than them. Or someone gets paid more when I do more work. So it’s not I don’t get jealous at all. Just not about relationships. Because if I lose my partner, that’s my fault.
So I feel the key to avoid jealousy in a relationship, it trust and honesty.

[km****]

December 6, 2022, SOWET4U said:

I’m NEVER Jealous!

I can and was an extremely jealous wom1/l an pretty much my entire life until recently. I've FINALLY figured out that getting jealous doesn't have to be a huge blow-up gloves off of kinda argument or fight. If I calmly explain to my bf if three years why I'm feeling those nasty jealous stabs and we have an open conversation about why and what made me feel in adequate or less- .then someone those negative feelings are put to bed swiftly and quickly and we're still both happy and hopelessly in love with one another. However in all my past relationships jealousy was a definite huge argument. - possibly a break-up.

[MasterDarcy1979]

Jealousy is a symptom of low self esteem and a fragile ego.

Yeah. There's nuances and variables, etc, but it's usually always an issue with your own ego.

My ego has always been on the large and secure side, so I've never felt jealousy.

Is it a bad thing? I'd say so. I would say that it's a trust issue and should probably have to be discussed as something like that tends to fester and corode a relationship.