When Is A Brat Not A Brat?

[CopperKnob]

When they're single of course

"Wait! What? Doesn't it mean that you get to brat everyone? Isn't that like a dream come true?!?"

I hear you all ask

No. It's not. Fortunately.

Not simply because, bratting outside of agreed parameters within a relationship is a dick move but, because brats (not dickheads) need their safe person, their someone to keep them fettered to reality. It takes a very particular type of Dtype to understand that their brat's bratting, is nothing more than their love language, designed for them to be able to re-establish their dominance.

And yeah, it is a very special Dtype who is suited to a brat. You'll need to understand how we communicate through behaviour, not just the spoken word. You'll need to know the why behind the bratting and that we all brat for different reasons and needs. You'll need a bucket full of salt, a healthy dose of patience and hopefully, the ability to play us at our own game, to brat just as hard

When brats are unfettered, life becomes overwhelming, somewhat scary and a little chaotic. There is no one to tell us the rules or enforce them. There are, therefore, no more rules to break. So what is the point of being a brat if no one is going to ground us?

Not having someone to tease and provoke makes it hard to be a brat. Knowing that no matter how much we play around, outside of a consensual relationship, no one is actually allowed to give us death stares or play murder us in the library with the candlestick and quite frankly, that's more than a little bit demoralising, the little devil on our shoulder are literally crushed by it.

The truth is though, brats don't want just  anyone to want to play murder us. We only want that one person to do so. While it may seem like we are too independent and don't give two 🦆's about what life throws at us because we can typically handle anything that comes our way, we actually care very very deeply. We want to know that our person will be thinking of us, caring about us and that no matter what, we have someone whose got our back.

We get it, we are challenging, and we are contradictory. We love without abandon because we fear abandonment and that might mean we behave differently to other stypes. It might mean that we don't initially present as submissive at all. We might say " 🦆off" when we actually mean, "don't go" and we might not take everything as seriously as we should on the surface but we do. I promise you that we do. We just like fun, testing the water and to be reminded of your dominance because when we feel it, life becomes a little less overwhelming, scary and chaotic.

To brat all the time, with people who've not consented to it, that don't have the ability or permission to respond as we need or even want is not bratting, it's disrespectful, it's being a dick and is very very pointless.

So, when is a brat not a brat? When they are without an other half.

[Char__]

Why did you have to out me like that??? Lol Absolutely spot on. Tragically.

[Ar****]

This just might, in it's way, be the sweetest thing of yours I've ever read. I'm left with quite a wry smile.

[MrJohnson]

That was just beautiful.

[lolli-leigh]

amazingly written as always x

[CopperKnob]

4 hours ago, Lady_Char said:

Why did you have to out me like that??? Lol Absolutely spot on. Tragically.

I'm so sorry 😂😂😂

[CopperKnob]

4 hours ago, Aranhis said:

This just might, in it's way, be the sweetest thing of yours I've ever read. I'm left with quite a wry smile.

The sweetest? May be because i'm not taking the piss 🤔

[4R****]

Very well put but if you keep writing stuff like this, people might start to believe you’re a brat!

[CopperKnob]

14 minutes ago, 4RCH said:

Very well put but if you keep writing stuff like this, people might start to believe you’re a brat!

I'm no such thing!
(There's no hands on hips emoji?)

[Fa****]

Every time I read your writings I love you just a little bit more. Thanks for putting my thoughts on “paper” again 😘

[se****]

You really hit the nail, and one of the best pieces.👏💖

[4R****]

6 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

I'm no such thing!
(There's no hands on hips emoji?)

Awwww bless......... 

[CopperKnob]

3 hours ago, 4RCH said:

Awwww bless......... 

I imagine that you said this in your bestest "be sarcastic to the brat" voice 😂

[4R****]

2 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

I imagine that you said this in your bestest "be sarcastic to the brat" voice 😂

Of course I did……..

Now stop pouting 😉

[CopperKnob]

1 hour ago, 4RCH said:

Of course I did……..

Now stop pouting 😉

I don't pout, it's filler 💋💄😂😂

[Ch****]

Well written expose. I'm curious about whether you feel bratting behavior takes place during initial flirting/meeting stage typically, or not until truly established?

[CopperKnob]

4 hours ago, ChromeDom said:

Well written expose. I'm curious about whether you feel bratting behavior takes place during initial flirting/meeting stage typically, or not until truly established?

I think that I'm crap at flirting 😂😂 I may tease, be sarcastic etc but generally my character is to make light of situations. My family weren't/aren't particuarly affectionate. My grandad definitely showed affection through those 👆 behaviours so it's a learnt behaviour to a degree.
I don't see that as bratting and I do feel bratting should only be part of a consensual relationship. Bratting should (for me) be fun for both parties. Like I think someone said on another post, I don't brat for "punishment" I do it for other reasons. Whatever the reason/s for bratting, unless it's been discussed and agreed, you aren't necessarily going to get the response you want/need so to do it with someone who doesn't know you well enough would be fruitless and frustrating and would set them up to fail