being a daddy without a little

[rainystatesman]

i'm a daddy, simple as that.

a bad breakup last year left me without a little.

the girl i'm with now is vanilla. i love her very much and i'm invested in a long term relationship. 

but i feel so lost without having a little around. i miss being 'daddy.' i miss being the protector. i miss the respect and love aspect of the dd/lg relationship.

i almost feel wrong for being so lost and helpless. i have to keep reminding myself that doms get there sometimes, too.

is this natural? is there anything i can do it make it feel less empty?

[PhantomFlogger]

I feel you friend.

I know this is obvious, as a top with lots of experience, you already know communication is key.

Have you tried telling your partner how you feel, maybe not all at once but say "i like it when you lay on my lap" or so on, then reward good behaviour with words she is okay with.

 

If youve already tried that, how about looking at it as if you are still the DD but your little is older, im sure if you try positive reinforcement she will automatically do what pleases you.

 

Lastly if all fails you can just be yourself and think of her as your little, if she doesn't like being treated like your little then its you as a person she has a problem with... dont change for anyone, it never works out

[Mi****]

Im afraid I have to disagree with the above poster, you cant have a stealth DD/lg relationship without consent it is just wrong.

Talk to her, explain what it is you enjoy about the DD/lg dynamic, who knows she may enjoy that too, but if she doesn't then you have to decide between her or the dynamic

[Deleted Member]

You sound like a good daddy. Good luck. I hope it works out! 👍

[Deleted Member]

7 hours ago, MissTillysue said:

Im afraid I have to disagree with the above poster, you cant have a stealth DD/lg relationship without consent it is just wrong.

Talk to her, explain what it is you enjoy about the DD/lg dynamic, who knows she may enjoy that too, but if she doesn't then you have to decide between her or the dynamic

Totally agree.

Consent is essential. You can't consent to something without being asked.

The honest conversation has to be the best way, if not the only way.

[rainystatesman]

thank you all.

i agree, consent and communication is very important when in a BDSM arrangement/relationship. 

her and i have touched base about it, and she’s aware that i’m a dominant, but i don’t think she knows i’m a daddy, per se- at least, she knows i enjoy being called daddy or papi, but i don’t think she knows the extent of it.

[ey****]

my first tip - really simple

be open and honest about who you are and what you want.  it may very well be that she is or can be on a similar page and you can gain a dynamic you're happy with.

Otherwise you're in a relationship you're not happy in and that's not good for you or fair to her.

[KCurious]

Enjoy every moment together and you never know things might work the way you want it to go or both wants to go. Talk to her and see what happens and what her reaction is , you never know she might be curious or maybe your both be surprised to whatever you reach. All the best. ☘️😄