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delayed sub-drop

ElleFire

By ElleFire
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ElleFire

ElleFire

Posted

Does anyone else have experience with chronic delayed sub-drop?  It happens every time I play lately (all are directed online play sessions and have involved orgasm control/denial and some mild ***) but not until 20+ hours later. I completely understand the biochemical aspect of it, but am wondering if anyone has tips for preventing it?  Will it get better as I gain experience?  (I'm about 6 months into my sub journey).  And if it's this severe when I'm playing online what will happen when I play in real time?  I've been doing a lot of self-care when it happens and it helps, but I'd really like to figure out some prevention strategies. Thanks much, in advance, for any suggestions.

Deleted Member

Posted
From what I have researched myself, sub drop can be delayed by days, not just hours. The best thing to do is research it and make sure that your Dominant takes care of you as much as possible
Ra****

Ra****

Posted
Both sub drop and top drop can happen a long time later. I never experienced it myself or never realised I did but I know people that have been on the lifestyle a very long time and still experience it. I don't suggest you expecting it not to happen. I suggest you should discuss this with your play partner and try to look after each other as best as you can.
Ac****

Ac****

Posted
Sub drop occurring a couple of days later is not uncommon, once you have fully come down from the high.

Deleted Member

Posted
Hey there. From my experience and research etc - just want to assure you that it’s totally normal and actually entirely sensible. As subs we endure emotional warfare in sessions (for the greater good of course) but that means we have to come down too. And it’s that come down which can feel like a depressing ‘drop’ and it’s not nice I know x It’s not something one can get rid of but it’s sometbing one should be proactive about as opposed to reactive. Keep up the self care, try and connect with a fellow sub or 2 and have those friendships to lean on when it starts to feel like it’s kicking in. The more you equip yourself with knowledge, friends etc - the better you will be able to manage it. Something I found helpful via a YouTuber sub who I recommend to all subs (Evie lupine - check her out!!) is the idea of a sub-drop-kit which she encourages all subs have. A combination of special items set aside specifically for when sub drop kicks in so you can naturally comfort yourself and bring your mood back up. Comfy clothes, soft toys, snacks, clothing with certain smells etc. Your own little package saved for when you need it most. Otherwise, keep on trying to find what works for you and in the meantime - you’re not alone xx
Tillysub

Tillysub

Posted

Try to use things that are comforting for all your senses something to smell, taste, look at, touch and listen too all of a comforting nature.

 

Try also to care for yourself immediately before a session as you would after precare if you will, it might help to prevent the severity of the drop. 

 

I wouldn’t worry too much about whether it will be worse in person, the drop might be but the physical aftercare will also be enhanced. I find the aftercare much more nurturing and preventative for drop when it is in person.....with the right person of course!

ElleFire

ElleFire

Posted
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Thanks Tilly - I hadn't thought about precare but it makes lots of sense! I've also ignored scent, which is silly as I know it's very important to me. thanks love!

Deleted Member

Posted

From my experience you can't stop a drop from happening but there are ways to help get you through it . Like @Tillysub says looking after yourself before a play session as well as after will help. I've had drops that have lasted a week and sometimes you just have to ride them out just make sure your looking after yourself. So I always put a bag together of my favourite things, so a candle , some chocolate and sweets I make myself a sweet cup of tea get under a blanket and watch some of my favourite films or a TV show that I love. And i concur what @SophieSub190says and make sure you have sub friends you can get in contact and chat with if you need. If my Sir can't be around it's vital I have my bag and my friends around to message if I can't talk to him.

Deleted Member

Posted

Lovely people thank you so much for this post. Brad new to the scene, new Sir and had my first ever sub drop last night and its been HELL. 4 days later and it hits me like a ton of bricks. Not coping, not doing okay and just a bit of a mess. Have taken to journaling, music, went on a long dog walk today. Anything to try and get out of the funk. 

Deleted Member

Posted
Hope you feel better too @NaughtyNat. Important we’re all here for each other! We were all new once and we never stop learning! Xx

Deleted Member

Posted
22 minutes ago, SophieSub190 said:

Hope you feel better too @NaughtyNat. Important we’re all here for each other! We were all new once and we never stop learning! Xx

Its been hell, today has not been a good day either if I am being honest. It was a gradual build up of wobbling then the sub drop kicked my ass last night and is kicking my ass now if Im being brutally honest. But im working on it

Deleted Member

Posted
49 minutes ago, Lilmonster said:

@NaughtyNatif you need any one to chat to let me know and hit me up on kik hun. 

Thanks @Lilmonster! Might take you up on that hun <3

Ra****

Ra****

Posted
2 hours ago, NaughtyNat said:

Lovely people thank you so much for this post. Brad new to the scene, new Sir and had my first ever sub drop last night and its been HELL. 4 days later and it hits me like a ton of bricks. Not coping, not doing okay and just a bit of a mess. Have taken to journaling, music, went on a long dog walk today. Anything to try and get out of the funk. 

Sorry to hear this Nat 😔 here if you need anything 💛

Deleted Member

Posted
@NaughtyNat oh no, does sound like you’ve had a rough one. Just as @Lilmonster said, I’m also here too if you need anything xx

Deleted Member

Posted

Its been hell ladies. I have taken to writing it all out and trying to drag myself out. I am currently thinking very loud music through headphones, bubble bath and maybe an early night. Just exhausted from it! Also suffer from mental health (Bipolar/BPD) so thats also not helping the drop! Feel like a slowly deflating helium balloon 

Deleted Member

Posted
24 minutes ago, NaughtyNat said:

Its been hell ladies. I have taken to writing it all out and trying to drag myself out. I am currently thinking very loud music through headphones, bubble bath and maybe an early night. Just exhausted from it! Also suffer from mental health (Bipolar/BPD) so thats also not helping the drop! Feel like a slowly deflating helium balloon 

Awww Nat I sent you my Kik please send me a message 💋💋 

Ra****

Ra****

Posted
21 minutes ago, NaughtyNat said:

Its been hell ladies. I have taken to writing it all out and trying to drag myself out. I am currently thinking very loud music through headphones, bubble bath and maybe an early night. Just exhausted from it! Also suffer from mental health (Bipolar/BPD) so thats also not helping the drop! Feel like a slowly deflating helium balloon 

Writing and bubble bath and music seem good. Do what you always do to feel good girl. For me would be pizza in bed and then dominoes cookies 🙈😂 hot water bottle naked and yellow blanket and cuddle with my cushion and talk with someone that cared about me if I can't cuddle with someone x

Deleted Member

Posted

Okay ladies, finally feeling a little more put together. Reached out to an amazing friend of mine from here who has been my rock! Bubble bath complete, hot coco in hand, writing done, music on, fluffy slippers! 

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