Question

[se****]

During your journey of finding your sub/dom.
We can’t just look at someone, and know if they’re the one or not. But sometimes a picture can tell a lot, and we have their profile descriptions to base our opinions off of. So my question here is, when you’re scrolling and searching what is it about someone’s profile that instantly disqualifies them. Or instantly makes them unattractive to you?

[Ja****]

Distance

[Ae****]

Negativity. Lists of things they *don't* want. Complaining. Warnings to people thinking of messaging them.

This is distinct from talking about things they struggle with, difficult pasts etc, which is actually fine - that's open, vulnerable, authentic, and evokes a sense that this person is delicate yet courageous and to be handled with care. That's sweet.

But a bad attitude coming through, a hassle, rudeness, stuff like that - that person is deeply unattractive. I can imagine regretting it in 5 seconds if I were to meet them.

That's when I leave the profile. It's great that people, without knowing, so directly and immediately show you who they are. Saves time and frustration.

[be****]

No not at all I'm a very open person and want to find my perfect match

[He****]

If they smoke, instant no.

[Al****]

Anyone who sticks out their tongue or gives the finger to the camera is instantly disqualified. Or when someone can’t take 5 minutes to write something about themselves on their profile, that disqualifies. The worst is no pics. Pics are what gets your foot in the door and if I can’t see you then don’t even bother.

[do****]

Articulation in their profile. If.they cannot express themselves with words or at least give it effort, instant no. Second is no picture. Too many men on her catfishing and playing because their bored

[Hu****]

Lacking a picture isnt very helpful, I understand some people are shy/nervous/anxious about stuff like this, but it helps give a lot of insight into who you are and your lifestyle.

[Th****]

There seems to be an overabundance of profiles with shirtless men with "no limits" who promise to make all of your wildest fantasies come true. First of all if you say you have "no limits" I'll ask if I can shit in your mouth. No? I can't? Oh look at that, you have limits. Sit down and stop trying to sound edgy lol (p.s. not into that, just proving a point lol) if a profile is all sexual and says nothing about wanting to make any sort of connection other than physical, I'm done. Any relationship dynamic, even FWBs, takes effort. I'm not just a life support system for that thing you're after and I refuse to be treated as such

[Ae****]

Crass communication.

[su****]

Race. And I mean that in a respectful way

[ze****]

These people can say whatever they want to make them seem politically correct but this world is just as sideways and double standardized like every dating world. They say they want more than just sex but what they don't tell yeah is that above and beyond it's about looks and those shirtless guys are always going to get the attention.

[Hu****]

Also want to add that I see "want experienced Dom's only" on so many profiles, understandable that you want someone who knows what they are doing, but also not every dom becomes immediately experienced overnight, also what do you yourself bring to the table besides your fantasy?

[YorkshireBiker]

5 hours ago, Aeonova said:

Negativity. Lists of things they *don't* want. Complaining. Warnings to people thinking of messaging them.

This is distinct from talking about things they struggle with, difficult pasts etc, which is actually fine - that's open, vulnerable, authentic, and evokes a sense that this person is delicate yet courageous and to be handled with care. That's sweet.

But a bad attitude coming through, a hassle, rudeness, stuff like that - that person is deeply unattractive. I can imagine regretting it in 5 seconds if I were to meet them.

That's when I leave the profile. It's great that people, without knowing, so directly and immediately show you who they are. Saves time and frustration.

Similar for me, but it could be that this is exactly what the profile set out to achieve.  I’m not an aggressive type of person by nature, more of a people pleaser, so really struggle to connect with people who are. I have no real problem with people messaging me directly if they feel we could have something to discuss, but if I did I don’t think I’d communicate that by saying ‘do not X Y or Z’ in big red letters on my profile.
 

I’m not looking for any partners or hook ups on here but there are some post I’ve seen that made me think a conversation with that person might be good, but then I see the profile and have absolutely no interest in speaking to them.

Again, this could be the exact reason they put that in which case it works like a charm with me.  

[se****]

I have a few things that instantly turns me off. But one I would have to say is when someone puts out their that they don’t associate with other races, because they have bad experiences with that race. We’re all grown adults here, are we not mature enough to know that everyone isn’t the same? I truly think it’s childish if you say you’ve had a bad experience with 2 people from x race. So you’ve permanently disqualified everyone else who just so happens to be that same race.

[Ba****]

People who don't have a profile picture. I don't trust it. It feels like they just made their profile and haven't finished it, or that they're not who they say they are. And if they don't have a profile picture with their face, I can get that. Some jobs are weird about their employees. But not having one at all? 😐

[tu****]

No real disqualification, for me it is all about our personalities meshing.

[Ob****]

Some big ones for me are - when we are clearly not compatible in what we are looking for (e.g NSA only, or they seem only focussed on a physical connection). It’s good when people are honest about this as it saves everyone time. But obviously if it’s friendship that brought us together, this is not so applicable.
If they haven’t written much about themselves and clearly haven’t bothered with their profile, that’s a turn off.
Also, a profile pic of a naked torso only, particularly if it’s a ripped one, also doesn’t do it for me. I know, I’m probably odd with that one!
And the “no limits” comment also rings bells and I tend to avoid those people too. I’ve noticed the “no limits” comment often is paired with a sparse profile.

[My****]

When they create a profile and there’s no “about me”, “description” says “hi”their bio haven’t been filled out, and usually no profile pic.

[ta****]

Profile not filled out.
Profile is just an ad for their Snapchat/only fans/etc
Findom being the primary kink on the profile = Fakedom in my mind. Your doing it for money not because it makes you horny
No profile pic or they are all heavily filtered or just super close up on the face.

[Ma****]

You know you can Hardly Trust anyone Online these days .. its better in person that's how I feel  though. Crazy times We live in 

Edited May 21 by Manny678

[Ma****]

On 5/8/2023 at 4:53 AM, AlienAngel999 said:

Anyone who sticks out their tongue or gives the finger to the camera is instantly disqualified. Or when someone can’t take 5 minutes to write something about themselves on their profile, that disqualifies. The worst is no pics. Pics are what gets your foot in the door and if I can’t see you then don’t even bother.

? Hmmm 🤔 I wonder what this is here it sounds ironic since it's not updated 

[MasterDarcy1979]

Great question.

It both pertains to me and doesn't.

I do read a lot of profiles, however, I never initiate contact. No matter how good the profile is, or how compatibility we sound or how much our kinks align, I won't initiate contact.

I don't initiate contact because women receive dozens and dozens of messages on a daily basis. I don't want my message to be lost in the mass.

Now, onto what I like and dislike when I read profiles:

Like:

Similarities in kink (I just read a profile that stated a lot for watersports. Instant intrigue smd attraction)

Compatibilities in nature and character and interests.

Length. I do loves me a well written and lengthy profile.

Some people say that they don't like negative profiles, where people talk about what they dislike, etc, but as long as it's balanced by likes then it's all good.

Dislike:

Lack of length or even nothing written on their profile.