A poem for Valentine's Day

[Ar****]

Happy Valentine's Day and much love to you all!! 💜

Inspired by a jokey meme a friend shared last night (which gave me the first line), I created a little composition as I was heading to sleep and thought I'd share it. Enjoy (or not 😆) and have a beautiful day.

 

*  *  *  *  *  *  *

 

Put the dishes in the dishwasher, but not like that
The plates should all be upright, not sort-of-mostly flat
Why the hell's that dish that way you god-damned silly twat?

Put the dishes in the dishwasher, no not the wooden spoon
Don't overload the rack y'dick, there isn't any room
You'll make the whole thing flood and then the socket will go boom.

Put the dishes in the dishwasher, be careful with the glass
Put it on the top rack, mind you do not make it smash
But hurry so that you can give a seeing to my ass.

[CopperKnob]

God, I'm getting flashbacks of being yelled at "who put the knives in pointy way up!!!"

[ca****]

.... are you Jon Richardson in disguise?  Or maybe a close relative!!!!

Edited February 15 by callipygian
typo!

[Ar****]

1 hour ago, CopperKnob said:

God, I'm getting flashbacks of being yelled at "who put the knives in pointy way up!!!"

Nuuuuuuu! 😔

I put table knives pointy end up, other ones down. But that's because that's what was drilled into me doing kitchen hygiene courses a number (cough) of years ago. Something to do with it being more hygienic for them to dry with more exposure to the air and with excess water running down the handle rather than the blade - but superseded by other H&S protocols in the case of sharper knives.

I don't imagine it makes a huge amount of difference and expect what you're "supposed" to do keeps changing. Surely an upwards-pointing fork is more hazardous than a dinner knife? 🤔

[Ar****]

1 hour ago, callipygian said:

.... are you Jon Richardson in disguise?  Or maybe a close relative!!!!

😂😂 Now that you've said it I very much see the style. And damn, I AM wearing a cardigan today... 😳

[CopperKnob]

4 hours ago, Aranhis said:

Nuuuuuuu! 😔

I put table knives pointy end up, other ones down. But that's because that's what was drilled into me doing kitchen hygiene courses a number (cough) of years ago. Something to do with it being more hygienic for them to dry with more exposure to the air and with excess water running down the handle rather than the blade - but superseded by other H&S protocols in the case of sharper knives.

I don't imagine it makes a huge amount of difference and expect what you're "supposed" to do keeps changing. Surely an upwards-pointing fork is more hazardous than a dinner knife? 🤔

All I know is, put the knives in facing down that way no one slices their hands! 🤷‍♀️

[Th****]

18 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

All I know is, put the knives in facing down that way no one slices their hands! 🤷‍♀️

That

[CopperKnob]

5 hours ago, ThaliaV said:

That

Yeah, apparently not everyone is into knife play, who knew?! 🤷‍♀️🤣

[Th****]

2 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

Yeah, apparently not everyone is into knife play, who knew?! 🤷‍♀️🤣

Not without consent!! 😄

[CopperKnob]

3 minutes ago, ThaliaV said:

Not without consent!! 😄

Good point well made! Don't be sneaky when attempting knife play people!