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How to find bdsm partners easily


MontrealEnvy

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Posted
1 hour ago, Fredddy said:

With Jalapeños! I like mine HOT HOT HOT! Pizzas. And women....

Jalapenos on pizza, yes. Pineapple on pizza, now that is a no no from me.

Posted

So here I am...with a pizza! Just a pizza, no women or men were harmed in the making on this occasion. 😂

Therefore proving, as the original post stated, I am in fact overweight, old & desperate .....just not for young pretty boys hahaha 

Posted (edited)

I do not want to sound mean and there is no intention to upset anyone. Some might agree or disagree with me, But!

How the man can call himself a "good looking" and use it as a main "achievement" to approach a female?

How can you measure how good looking you are on your own?

If you finding yourself as an expert of assessing the prettiness of a male's face - you might be looking in the wrong direction for your final goal initially.

Some like spicy, some like sweet and there are plenty of people liking something in between. Some will find you attractive and some will not. This is not the thing to begin with for sure.

I'm a big believer that in the world of kink you follow your mind, not the amount of the wax applied to your hair.

 

Regarding your uncertainty of willing BDSM, but not taking part in it.

Well... you have to pick a side eventually and stick with the community where you belong. 

Edited by DanielHoup
My poor grammar.
Posted
31 minutes ago, BigPolly said:

So here I am...with a pizza! Just a pizza, no women or men were harmed in the making on this occasion. 😂

Therefore proving, as the original post stated, I am in fact overweight, old & desperate .....just not for young pretty boys hahaha 

Let the young pretty boys trot on by.

Pepperoni pizza? 

Posted

Down to strawberry and orange quality street here 😝

Posted
33 minutes ago, quietlysure said:

Down to strawberry and orange quality street here 😝

Now you is meant to take the top off the strawberry one and lick out the centre. 

Posted

Though I saw the other day deep fried quality street in batter is a thing now

Posted
6 minutes ago, quietlysure said:

😝😝

Yup, that is the right action, haha,

Posted
1 minute ago, quietlysure said:

Though I saw the other day deep fried quality street in batter is a thing now

Oh, use to be mars bars. Wont quality street be too small compared to a mars bar?

Posted

You have to freeze them first, then do a bowl full

Posted

Tut, well go to local chippy and ask them then. Don't forget to take the manky quality street with you. Remember to say please and a thank you and a smile alus works, well for me it does. haha. 

Posted

Being one of those Europeans, I am not sure anything deepfried in batter is good. I can barely eat Battered Cod or Haddock - much prefer breadcrumb.

Now, there is an idea crumbed cheese :)

Posted

w o w

So normally I wouldn't respond but I caused so much movement, Ive got to answer.

Thanks for that one guy who got what I meant. First of all, I can agree that that I sounded a bit like an ass but english is not my main language and I am a bit too direct in general.

Of course I sounded a bit offensive, but that's not what I was trying to sound like. 

I seriously dont want to go on and answer all of you because for the most part you all stretched everything offensive that I said and ignored the rest

I am not interessed in taking part in this community and I have been confirmed just by many of those answers. 

Sorry again if some of all are offended by things that I said, but some of you maybe need to understand that the minding of this community is really special for someone like me who never got into bdsm.

For the people who assumed that I am vanilla.. I can assure you by experience that Im not if so I would go on Tinder. I have a lot of interesting fetishes that I wanna do again, I'm just not interested in taking part of this. All I was saying is that statically there must be people like me who want to try some fetishes without taking part of all this stuff.

You guys dont get it because youre so into it and I assume it takes a fair part of your life but for an outsider, to come on fetlife and see people with 100 pics and friends, it can be kind of scary. And I am not in the wrong for just looking for someone to explore theses things with me without that person being this much into it.

I am not ashamed at all for asking this question on the first fetish site that I found on Google.

And stop being so hypocritical by saying that I am rude while dissing me at the same time. Some of you got real triggered because I said that I am pretty? Really? I personally wouldn't mind that someone is calling himself good looking but oh well, to each their triggering.

Im not here to argue and I will not answer to further off topic comments, I come here to ask for help as to how to achieve my "goal". If you are all saying that the only way is to either post pics of me online and make friends in this community well I'll just go on tinder. 

 

I don't have trouble at all on Tinder about finding hookups, but I thought that it would be more fun with people with kinda deviant minds like me, but maybe I'm wrong?

Posted
7 minutes ago, MsBossyCow said:

Tut, well go to local chippy and ask them then. Don't forget to take the manky quality street with you. Remember to say please and a thank you and a smile alus works, well for me it does. haha. 

Lol, I do have a friendly chipshop I use 😋

Posted
Just now, quietlysure said:

Lol, I do have a friendly chipshop I use 😋

Well, let us know how it goes then, alus a first, haha.

Posted

News flash I'm not remotely in the scene, do I enjoy kink, yes, do I like vanilla, yes, in all truth I've found all here friendly and excepting, why am I here, in real-life I get flustered saying hello to a woman, even just in a friendly way

Posted
10 minutes ago, quietlysure said:

News flash I'm not remotely in the scene, do I enjoy kink, yes, do I like vanilla, yes, in all truth I've found all here friendly and excepting, why am I here, in real-life I get flustered saying hello to a woman, even just in a friendly way

Is this arrogance fueled by insecurities? Seems to be my friend. You wont get far long by insulting others, guessed you would know that at your age.

 

I'm looking for constructive answers, not trying to make ennemies out here, some of you seem to be on the edge a bit.

Posted
8 minutes ago, MontrealEnvy said:

I have a lot of interesting fetishes that I wanna do again, I'm just not interested in taking part of this. All I was saying is that statically there must be people like me who want to try some fetishes without taking part of all this stuff.

I appreciate what you're saying - you're coming over a lot better here then I feel you did in the original post.

So, yes - of course.  There are many people who are into kink within different shades who are not interested in munches, events, the community aspect - or whatever - and it can be difficult to find those people.  I totally agree.  

But, there's no easy way to find them.  It's just a case of patience, perseverance and looking at ways you can present yourself as being more desirable - and when this is online : you can have a well written profile without taking part in forums or chat.  So when you do reach to people they have something they can go off.

You don't need 100 pictures (some people don't like this as they feel the person is a show-off, for example) or to go to 20 munches a month (some aren't interested in that side of things) but the better you can present yourself and what you can offer the more likely people are to be interested.   

16 minutes ago, MontrealEnvy said:

Some of you got real triggered because I said that I am pretty? Really? I personally wouldn't mind that someone is calling himself good looking but oh well, to each their triggering.

I don't feel anyone was, as you say "triggered" - and, using words like "triggered" is a negative trait to avoid because you're using it as an attempt to shut others down or invalidate their feedback.

"Good looking" just seemed to be something you were very keen to stress - and, it was coming across that because you considered yourself good looking that there should be women fawning at your feet to deliver your desires; obviously I imagine this is not how you wished to come across but especially coupled with some of your comments on "older overweight" women it was coming over that they should be grateful you exist and it came over fairly entitled.

25 minutes ago, MontrealEnvy said:

come here to ask for help as to how to achieve my "goal".

and there was (amongst some of the noise) advice given...

25 minutes ago, MontrealEnvy said:

If you are all saying that the only way is to either post pics of me online and make friends in this community

...you just didn't like the advice.

Imagine, if you would, a scenario like this.   A woman on a dating site suddenly gets a message from a guy - he has no picture, little/no profile, nothing to really go on.  She looks at his profile and see he joined the site extremely recently.   How do you think she will react?  I imagine the likely reaction is "oh look, another bored horny guy who signs up, puts in no effort and contacts a bunch of women hoping for a bite.... ignore" 

You don't need 100 photos or a thesis - you just need something that when someone reads your message and looks at your profile they go "you know what, this guy might be interesting" 

35 minutes ago, MontrealEnvy said:

don't have trouble at all on Tinder about finding hookups

in which case. I certainly don't wish to chase anyone off site, but if you're having no problems on Tindr I don't entirely know why you'd use elsewhere?  It's perfectly cool to mention on Tindr that you've kinks or fetishes : you evidently have a presence on there that works, so build on that?

Posted
1 hour ago, MontrealEnvy said:

First of all, I can agree that that I sounded a bit like an ass but english is not my main language and I am a bit too direct in general.

Sorry again if some of all are offended by things that I said, but some of you maybe need to understand that the minding of this community is really special for someone like me who never got into bdsm.

You guys dont get it because youre so into it and I assume it takes a fair part of your life but for an outsider, to come on fetlife and see people with 100 pics and friends, it can be kind of scary. And I am not in the wrong for just looking for someone to explore theses things with me without that person being this much into it

I have just taken an extract of what you wrote - D/s is a journey and we all take different paths and time to get there. What I love about this site is that everyone is welcome and there is a great deal of acceptance of everyone.

What you may have gotten wrong, and to be honest, I think it is a poor excuse to blame it on the fact that English is not your main language, is the fact that you came across judgemental in terms of who are on this site.

You might do better by displaying a greater degree of acceptance and tolerance.

This is from someone, for whom English is also not his first lanugage - but that should not be an excuse for tolerant and balanced expression of opinions.

Just bear that in mind next time - and the fact that everyone is welcome no matter what the kink. We are not all into the same things, and that is what is great about this place.

Posted

oh dear ! I was so pleased to see your name again on the notification but then as soon I started reading you....my thought was sinking sand image...

you just missed it again 

good luck young man

Posted

You know, reading this thread, you would think that everybody on this site was extremely tolerant and accepting of other peoples opinions and kinks. That’s certainly how it should be, but unfortunately, my experience is that that is not the case. I had a severe trolling yesterday, just because I made a joke about somebody not having used the third D in my profile name. Yes, I was blocked by several people and had *** hurled at me.

I’ve always said that in this community, we should all aim to be a little nicer to each other. I don’t have an ounce of nastiness in me. or even 28.35g of it, if you’re a metric person. It’s really upsetting when people attack you, just because they’ve misinterpreted something that you’ve said.

So with this in mind, I feel somewhat guilty myself and I hold my hands up and say a genuine sorry, if I’ve misinterpreted something that the OP has said. Learning now that English is not his first language, I understand that maybe things did not come across quite as he intended. However, and I say this with all due respect, the general tone of the post was that he felt entitled. And there were some genuinely unsavoury comments about large women. Why should large women be made to feel that they are desperate? That’s just complete bollocks! Large women have large tits. And they are absolutely amazing! Especially if you are turned on by them, which I am. so the whole notion that some overweight woman who is the wrong side of 40 should be grateful to some 22-year-old stud who thinks he’s really good looking is absolutely nonsense. Attractiveness is not limited to physical appearance. I recently had an amazing encounter with someone who, by her own admission, was not exactly God’s gift to men. But the person as a whole was the most attractive and incredible person I’ve ever met! What she brought to the party was beyond anything I’ve ever experienced. And it’s completely changed my life. Don’t let your preconceptions colour your view of reality.
It all comes down to what I mentioned before: let’s be nice to each other on this site. People who live in glasshouses should not throw stones. Like it or not, those of us who are into things beyond vanilla, are in a minority. The vast majority of the world is vanilla. Do when we have others entering our world of non-vanilla, we should be nice to them. It all makes for a better, happier and more pleasant experience. Please, be nice!

Posted
6 minutes ago, Fredddy said:

It all comes down to what I mentioned before: let’s be nice to each other on this site. People who live in glasshouses should not throw stones. Like it or not, those of us who are into things beyond vanilla, are in a minority. The vast majority of the world is vanilla. Do when we have others entering our world of non-vanilla, we should be nice to them. It all makes for a better, happier and more pleasant experience. Please, be nice!

Well put Fredddy - I have to admit that I did not actually notice the third "d" until you pointed it out, so there is chance that others could miss that too.

.... but yes, do to others as you would have them do unto you

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