Apearance

[Deleted Member]

I think attraction is important in any relationship/dynamic; however, what people find attractive varies from person to person and no it’s not limited to simply appearance.

[Nononolan]

Always clean and clean clothes on

[Mi****]

November 27, 2024, BruiseWayne said:

Here's the honest unfiltered truth, people like to downplay how important looks are. Looks actually tell a whole lot about you. Sometimes you can judge a book by it's cover, but despite that looks for most people are just what gets your foot in the door, and then chemistry and compatibility, etc is what invites you in and lets you stay a while. But you will be treated better or worse depending on who you're dealing with based solely off of how you look, whether the person means to do that or not. It's just how people are wired. No one wants to seem like they're superficial when the topic comes up either so they bend over backwards trying to convince anyone who happens to be paying attention ( and possibly themselves ) how little it actually matters, but it matters quite a bit. The good news is it's not the ONLY thing that matters though, and especially for men chasing after women your personality will count for a whole lot more than how you look unless you're in like the top 1% of ridiculously attractive looking people, lol. So to answer your question, yes most chemistry is only somewhat based on how you look and the rest comes down to how charming or funny and interesting and exciting you are. If you share the same moral framework with someone. If your interests and hobbies align, and if you have complimentary personality traits. If they think you're a good person, or someone they can see themselves starting a family with. And etc etc etc. Besides anyone who is only interested in you based off of how you look isn't someone you want to be with in the first place. Hope that helps.

This was one of the better written, honest explanations I've ever come across

[Deleted Member]

Listen, I have an okay picture but I have more red flags than should be appropriate. Looks get the DM but it takes a special person that I’ll securely attach to. You know what I look for before responding? Respect and communication. If someone messages me without knowing me that they want to cum on my face, delete. If someone messages me and says, “Hey, I read your bio. I’m a dom. What is it about dom/sub that you’re interested in knowing more about.” I’ll probably respond. You sound like a good communicator Wes.

[sm****]

Total honesty? I couldn't care less about appearances, size, weight, age...so long as kinks align and the vibe is right then I'll happily submit if your looking for a more LTR then there needs to be a spark and by the time you're there looks are almost utterly inconsequential

[J-****]

My co-worker likes really curvy.
I like fit and thin.
Just have great hygiene, a decent wardrobe,
don't try to be someone you're not.
That's just my 2 cents

[ca****]

Easy to say but I had a quick look at your pics and from my perspective as a fellow human being, you look absolutely fine.  (assuming you mean visual appearance / looks and yes it is subjective)

 

When it comes to insecurities, that is kinda a different thing.....   I doubt I have ever met someone who has not had them....  many dont / wont show them and hide / mask them well (me for one!!!)

 

I believe you can work on insecurities and one way is to bring them out in the open (like you have done) - i hope this thread provides some useful insights for you and others who may also have similar self thoughts.

[Mi****]

How do guys feel about someone with a fair amount of scars (from surgeries)?

[Deleted Member]

On 5/6/2025 at 5:37 PM, MissGvus said:

How do guys feel about someone with a fair amount of scars (from surgeries)?

I personally wouldn't give a shit, or rather, I would find it kinda interesting and cool, but neither a turn on nor a turn off

I'm curious about body-type....I'm kinda...a little out of shape...I hide it well because I'm tall and I think (?) I have an attractive face, but I never hit on girls because I'm not in shape like I used to be, and it's not like I'm big enough to attract people who are into that, I'm just slightly pudgy...now I'm getting my life back on track I'm excited to hit the gym (for me, not for anyone else)...but like, am I correct in imagining a lot of girls wouldn't be into that? or is it all in my head? It doesn't matter too much cos it's a temporary situation, but it does really stop me hitting on girls 

[Mi****]

Yesterday at 04:22 AM, felix1234 said:

I personally wouldn't give a shit, or rather, I would find it kinda interesting and cool, but neither a turn on nor a turn off

I'm curious about body-type....I'm kinda...a little out of shape...I hide it well because I'm tall and I think (?) I have an attractive face, but I never hit on girls because I'm not in shape like I used to be, and it's not like I'm big enough to attract people who are into that, I'm just slightly pudgy...now I'm getting my life back on track I'm excited to hit the gym (for me, not for anyone else)...but like, am I correct in imagining a lot of girls wouldn't be into that? or is it all in my head? It doesn't matter too much cos it's a temporary situation, but it does really stop me hitting on girls 

I know plenty of women who dig a dad bod over a gym rat

[sm****]

May 6, MissGvus said:

How do guys feel about someone with a fair amount of scars (from surgeries)?

I worry about this too as I have a large surgical scar, that I try to cover but often worry about

[sm****]

May 10, felix1234 said:

I personally wouldn't give a shit, or rather, I would find it kinda interesting and cool, but neither a turn on nor a turn off

I'm curious about body-type....I'm kinda...a little out of shape...I hide it well because I'm tall and I think (?) I have an attractive face, but I never hit on girls because I'm not in shape like I used to be, and it's not like I'm big enough to attract people who are into that, I'm just slightly pudgy...now I'm getting my life back on track I'm excited to hit the gym (for me, not for anyone else)...but like, am I correct in imagining a lot of girls wouldn't be into that? or is it all in my head? It doesn't matter too much cos it's a temporary situation, but it does really stop me hitting on girls 

Not really a girl, but I love a dad bod/bear type....super sexy,

[Ur****]

@Westernsky11 , everyone has different tastes and wants and desires... Your not a bad looking person at all, don't do that to yourself, the word is hard enough my friend.. Just remember there is beauty in almost every thing in this world just need the right perspective... I'm sure you will have your "The One" , or more depending, there is too much stress on asthetics . Looks aren't the person you are, you are the person you are not the way u think you look or others.. keep trying don't ever give up and take chances, remember the long-shots pay more overall .. TC

[Ki****]

I find kink/bdsm community to be the LEAST concerned about appearance as in beauty standards. Unless it is a fetish towards a very specific body part (like big feet) or an act that requires a level of physical strenght, then it does not matter whatsoever how you are underneath it all. A sissy maid is a sissy maid no matter if they're cute twink or big hairy man outside of it. A Mistress is a mistress no matter if they look like Elvira or Hyacinth Bucket.