MK**** Posted May 25 In the Navy, “I hate it here” was more than a complaint -- it was camaraderie. You could say it in a chow line, half-asleep during muster, or after being voluntold for the 12th time in one day and no one would ask what’s wrong. They’d just nod. Maybe grunt. Didn’t matter if they were an E1 or an E9 -- the hate was mutual, and the bond was real. But out here? In the civilian world? You say “I hate it here” and people look at you like you need therapy, crystals, and a gratitude journal. They think something’s wrong with you -- not the world around you. They want you to vibe higher instead of just being real. It used to be shared suffering. Now it’s personal pathology. And honestly? I hate it here. ___ * Can frustration ever be more honest or revealing than joy in group dynamics? Why or why not? * What’s the difference between toxic complaining and camaraderie-building frustration? * How does the phrase “I hate it here” function as a shorthand for group belonging in high stress or emotionally intense environments? * Have you ever censored your own frustration because you ***ed being labeled negative, ungrateful, or broken? What was the result?
ey**** Posted May 25 I think people look at you as if you're mad because if you hate it here (whatever "it" and "here" may be) then why are you there? I mean sure, if it's a job - then you are there cos *** pays for goods and services. It may also be that options on other jobs may be limited due to no fault of your own. On the other hand, sure, it could be society as a whole because, let's be honest, the world could be a lot better. But everything in the middle? There's often no need to be somewhere you hate. There's also rarely a reason not to attempt to improve things.
Ge**** Posted May 25 You have some level of control on civvy street. "Some" freedom of choice. We are used to just dealing with whatever "it" and "here" is. Because it has to be done and we have no control in the matter. The tables are turned and we are the submissive. We learn to embrace the space, use the shared loathing as a bonding mechanism. A powerful tool to get you through the shift, however long. We even grow to enjoy it. A bad drug. If you don't laugh you cry. Our gratitude is that we can't do it without those serving alongside us. This goes without saying and does not need any affirmation. These people are far more than colleges. They are instantly close friends, our confidante, family, for life. The only cause for concern is when someone no longer says I hate it here. They have given up. Watch how the support rallies then.
sm**** Posted May 25 I can empathise, 14 years service, it's a shared comradery, with us all experiencing the same s##t but knowing you can trust everyone around you with your life and they with you. Just like non vets have trouble understanding our gallows humour or constantly calling all your mates every insult we can imagine and getting a better quip back, replying with a smile and a laugh, and we all understand and never take offence. There are a lot of times I wish I could be like that again without the *** of, someone being butthurt and loosing my job lol
Ri**** Posted May 26 Im not navy, or army but god does "I hate it here" resonate. I feel that in my bones
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