Where to meet people?

[Cr****]

Does anyone have experience meeting other kinky people out in the wild, or is meeting online before deciding to meet in person the status quo? I'm trying to get out of the house and socialize but just don't know what kinds of places I should be going to. I don't want to sit around and hope I meet someone online.

[Ho****]

Use the search features here or on FetLife to find like-minded people. FetLifε has some broader search features regarding groups, munches, and events within your particular geography. Going to your first munch alone can seem nerve racking, but you’re likely to find welcoming people and - eventually - a comfortable community.

[Ma****]

There is a way to get involved with your local kink community. Go to Fetlife website and sign up for free. Build out profile and then go to local events, type in your city and you will get a calendar of events to attend.

[Ry****]

The only places I've ever met anyone that is kinky is at kink related community events (the other fet is good for finding those)

[je****]

I try to meet in person for a drink and see where things ho

[Fa****]

I wish i knew a place -
I signed up to fet to help find out lol

[Ma****]

I think you'd be amazed by how many folks are into kink. It's hard to bring it up in conversation, but when you're brave enough to, in the right context, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Most people have soft kinks, handcuffs, mild spanking, a gentle hand around their neck, an attraction to a fabric, clothing type or mannerism.

Touching on them gently in a humorous open way can begin the conversation quite naturally.

As for a place, beyond a club, store or book aisle, you'll find us everywhere you find normal people.

Get out in general and relinquish any shame or *** of judgment you have about your kinks, own them and be open.

[KeziKarma]

There’s local gatherings advertised of fetlife 😊 A few local to me are held in pubs so it’s nothing kinky, just meeting people.
I think I’m more about meeting in the wild. Hard to get a feel for people online and I’m not looking for a hookup after a few texts lol

[Ma****]

Haha, I feel you, I would like an answer to this as well.

[Curiously_Exploring]

If you look in your area for kinky events, you will likely find socials where you can meet likeminded folks in comfortable settings.
For example, many adult clubs will have newbie evenings, or midweek relaxed evenings focused around boardgames, classes and all sorts.
Some kink social groups will hold regular munches in pubs or cafés. And some might hire rooms for things like learning rope play.
You might also find specialised market events in your area, where you can go and buy new kit and get the chance to meet others in the process.

I hope that's helpful for you 🙂

[Lo****]

If you join fetlife and look up your local area you will be able to find local ‘munches’ lots of lovely kinky people getting together to meet socially.

[Ri****]

I go to swingers clubs like thads

[de****]

I used to have a local dungeon that put on many events, some during the day more socially focused or kink market fairs. Also, it’s fresh in my mind as I went last week, renaissance fairs might be a good option as well. There is also a yearly con held in the city near me that’s completely kink/bdsm related.

[TheBookCollector]

Ive met kinky people at munches and play events.
.
Use a site called fetlife to find local munches, and contact the organiser.

[ma****]

Yes I wish I could meet someone who likes having fun and enjoying some kinkly fun!

[Da****]

Following would like to know as well

[sardonicus87]

Try a munch. If you go on FetLife, it's easier to find munches that way, most events seem posted there if they're not posted anywhere else.

Put in your city or whatever and you can see all the events within a chosen distance.

[Wi****]

That's a very good point, Idk how to find someone like us outside/online too. No one tells you how and where you can meet some kinky people.
So I think it's simpler for you to meet similar people in the USA for many reasons (size of the country/kinky community, open-mindedness...)
But here in France idk how to have some meetings, whatever the country it's not easy
*I'm so *** sorry mate

[Th****]

I, too, have wondered this. For me, at least, it seems meet-ups and what not are on a need to know basis. I assume just breaking out of social shells and making friends with people in the community would be the best way to find out

[Si****]

Gatherings of kinky people are usually called Munches. I'm sure there'll be some organised in your area too.

[Deleted Member]

For kink related its normally munches people meet at.
Im not great at socialising due to autism do I try online. But no luck either lol.

[sardonicus87]

Another thing about going to munches... you have to go regularly. I see too often people show up to a munch once and never return. For some, they go and find out kink isn't for them, but some get back online and complain they couldn't meet anyone when I know they didn't try or give it a chance because I was at the munches and they only went once and gave up. I've been going to them for nearly 20 years now, I've seen it happen a million times.
.
Also, don't treat a munch like it's a meat-market and don't go into it with any expectations.

[We****]

‘ Meetings in the wild’! .. now there is a phrase for the millennials . When we read this it crystallised our understanding of how life in the kingdom of kink has changed. As recent as the mid 90’s the medium would be ‘top shelf magazines’ containing pretty much the same information that is available online now. Before that we underground clubs existed that were known to those who knew the members or who were committed to finding them. The ‘wild’ is where everyone walks and talks and will live the life that they want others to see. It is possible that there are still a few of us that can walk through a public space and recognise the outward signs of a contented individual. People are more confident these days and most will display some signs that they have a particular predilection for kink so stay alert whilst in public spaces .. look for behaviour or physical characteristics consistent with a kink that stimulates your senses.. oh, and when you do find someone , ffs smile with your eyes and say hi !

[Ge****]

Let's start a movement!! Just like upside down pineapples signal who's swinging, kinksters should have a symbol to the world that we're available and down to connect with others even in vanilla settings. Now what would that be? 🍍

[Wa****]

It depends on how small your community is. Here in Wasilla Alaska it is more common for people to meet on kink apps then organically