Discretion

[Im****]

I’m just curious, outside of work related reasons what’re some reasons you or others you’ve come across have found a need to exercise discretion?

[LadyV]

Because I've had stalkers before cause creeps see women as possessions instead of people.

[wh****]

Maybe scammers and blackmailers

[ho****]

I don't know, but here in St Louis we got so many dicks in Witnesse Protection it takes a 2/3 majority in congress to get a face picture, but they always lead with a picture of their wacker.....

[Me****]

It’s just a cautious approach for me. I usually share more once I feel comfortable with someone.

[us****]

1 hour ago, hotts4usmc said:

I don't know, but here in St Louis we got so many dicks in Witnesse Protection it takes a 2/3 majority in congress to get a face picture, but they always lead with a picture of their wacker.....

Now that is funny😂

[Curiously_Exploring]

I feel anxious about anyone I know realising that I'm here - and I feel even more anxious about anyone I don't know trying to take advantage of me. So until I feel safe with someone, they don't see my face.

[Do****]

I've encountered men that seek affairs. I know it's a kink for some, but not for me so I avoid them.

[li****]

Publicizing my private life has never served me.

[sa****]

The biggest reason for discretion is the simple fact if your not disrespectful every crazy person that should be on meds comes out and whont to in gage in talk or arguments dont have the time to navigate that mind fild

[Im****]

Appreciate all the perspectives guys!

[Su****]

Ppl gossip and can get jealous.

[ey****]

it depends on what you mean by 'discretion' - but, well, private life is private.

 

[sardonicus87]

Discretion from public eye is one thing (including online), discretion from their partner/SO is a red flag though.

[Frenchies]

A simple matter of reputation. In our case a relatively vanilla husband with an experienced sub wife, both with professional statuses in a relatively small local community with nearby parents.

[Si****]

Small community is (or was) my concern, too. For someone who is new, this could be overwhelming, too. So it is understandable that some open up more slowly than others IMO

[sardonicus87]

Not mentioned but something I have heard too often, sometimes people also want to be discrete even from the rest of the BDSM scene.

Regardless of whether or not they have a significant other, if they are known to have a play partner, but especially if known to have more than one play partner, people might react poorly to rejection and respond with "but you play with other people, why not me? Wahhh wahhh wahhh". Gives dirtbags less ammunition.

I haven't heard of this specifically happening, but have heard of people being approached at a play party and rejecting someone they don't want to play with, only to later play with someone else and be re-approached by the rejectee with that same kind of thing "but you played with them...".