Does the bar scene still work?

[ey****]

29 minutes ago, Intake-Deez said:

Lol I like to dive into things without any clue what's going on. Keeps life super exciting

In kink that's worrying

it may well be that your struggles to find someone stem from an unwillingness to do basic research.

30 minutes ago, Intake-Deez said:

Are there ways to find these munches?

proving my point.

[In****]

34 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said:

proving my point.

This is my research, my friend. Right now I'm looking for a partner the same way I'm looking to buy a Ferrari. If it happens, I'll be shocked. Once I reach my fitness goals, then I'll begin looking to dive deeper into the community.

[Mi****]

1 hour ago, Intake-Deez said:

Good question at the end. Escalation to me simply means the step. I never go into a meeting with a person with goals before talking to them. If I'm getting sexual vibes then escalation means going home with that person. If I'm getting interesting to speak to and high attraction vibes then escalation means a second meet up. But really that part I don't struggle with. For me it's the cold open. Other than peacocking or just walking straight up with a rehearsed line. Starting the conversation is my weakness at the moment

Everyone struggles with icebreakers. The rehearsed ones can come off as fake and obvious. I have a few that are just simple and quick so that they come across showing natural interest. I like to ask people their favorite books (I’m an academic type so this can be a fast gauge of compatibility). Another is “You look like the type to break hearts”. That’s a good one. Anything that acknowledges something someone has control over, like their choice in clothing, fir example—“That’s an interesting ring. There must be a story behind it…” is much more personal and engaging than “You’re beautiful” or “I love your eyes” as those are things people don’t have a choice over and therefore don’t actually concern their essence or personality

[Mi****]

1 minute ago, MisterSatisfaction said:

Everyone struggles with icebreakers. The rehearsed ones can come off as fake and obvious. I have a few that are just simple and quick so that they come across showing natural interest. I like to ask people their favorite books (I’m an academic type so this can be a fast gauge of compatibility). Another is “You look like the type to break hearts”. That’s a good one. Anything that acknowledges something someone has control over, like their choice in clothing, fir example—“That’s an interesting ring. There must be a story behind it…” is much more personal and engaging than “You’re beautiful” or “I love your eyes” as those are things people don’t have a choice over and therefore don’t actually concern their essence or personality

Oh yeah and alternatives to books are favorite music or tv shows or movies. These are great conversation starters with anyone

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, eyemblacksheep said:

proving my point.

Yes. I'm not sure what to make of it, honestly, but definitely concerning.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Intake-Deez said:

This is my research, my friend. Right now I'm looking for a partner the same way I'm looking to buy a Ferrari. If it happens, I'll be shocked. Once I reach my fitness goals, then I'll begin looking to dive deeper into the community.

Awful comparison.
And, it doesn't ever "just happen" - these types of relationships require a lot of efforts which include being educated on the particulars. Your asking questions here is great, but there also need be another level of awareness, sensitivity, and a distinct lack of novel-seeking for anything deeper to occur, IMHO.

Have you even perused this site/app? Much basic info is included on one's own profile/Every user's access across the tabs such as the EVENTS tab......

[In****]

1 hour ago, NexumSange said:

Awful comparison.
And, it doesn't ever "just happen" - these types of relationships require a lot of efforts which include being educated on the particulars. Your asking questions here is great, but there also need be another level of awareness, sensitivity, and a distinct lack of novel-seeking for anything deeper to occur, IMHO.

Have you even perused this site/app? Much basic info is included on one's own profile/Every user's access across the tabs such as the EVENTS tab......

I don't think it's a bad comparison at all. You can't go to a dealership and say I want a Ferrari and get one. Got to find a location do research ect. You seem almost offended that I'm beginning my journey into a new world. My fault I didn't get a college degree on the subject beforehand.

[Deleted Member]

5 minutes ago, Intake-Deez said:

I don't think it's a bad comparison at all. You can't go to a dealership and say I want a Ferrari and get one. Got to find a location do research ect. You seem almost offended that I'm beginning my journey into a new world. My fault I didn't get a college degree on the subject beforehand.

No, comparing finding a PARTNER to buying a car is what I think is unsavoury.

[In****]

2 hours ago, NexumSange said:

No, comparing finding a PARTNER to buying a car is what I think is unsavoury.

Meh I said I'm looking for a partner the same way I'm looking to buy a Ferrari. Meaning I'm not seriously looking at all. I think you really wanted to be offended. But anyways I've gotten some good info thanks for the replies.

[ey****]

7 hours ago, Intake-Deez said:

 

This is my research, my friend. Right now I'm looking for a partner the same way I'm looking to buy a Ferrari. If it happens, I'll be shocked. Once I reach my fitness goals, then I'll begin looking to dive deeper into the community.

it feels you're putting more effort into this ferarri.

you already know what car you want, you already know where to get one, you already know it's out of your price range.  Cos at some point you've done some research

Like asking questions is cool, but most of them have been answered so many times, or are so easy googable, that it like does feel low effort.

Like even now, if you're not bothering with the community as you're prioritising fitness, there's no point anyone answering you, since you're already not going to do it.