Women

[Daddy88_8]

I have a question, would you say that all women are by nature submissive. I know that men can be submissive, and women can be dominant. But in a natural type setting are women just naturally submissive

[Deleted Member]

No. That's a stereotype. Some women are submissive. All women are not naturally anything, because we are individuals not a homogenous group.

[Si****]

If you met some of the Dommes I know, it would certainly answer your question! Women are not naturally submissive as much as men are not naturally Dominant: the male-driven and perpetuated patriarchal discourse and rhetoric, compounded further with archaic values in some cultures and sub cultures, would have you think otherwise. Then you have to acknowledge the premise of your question and try and identify the characteristics of what is "natural" which can lead to all sorts of problems. My personal opinion, briefly, is that how we act in particular theatres and situations is in accordance with our "nature" within the implicitly agreed rules that are in place, thus giving the green light for aspects of ourselves to manifest.

Fair question though: this should be met and discussed logically rather than anything else.

[Deleted Member]

No.

[Deleted Member]

No, they are not. Try perhaps a Leo woman. Or many others. Women often "wear the trousers" in relationships, and make all the important decisions. Some also do that in a way that leaves the man thinking he made the decisions. IMHO

[Deleted Member]

No.

[ey****]

the "women are naturally submissive" trope is a lie that misogynists say to excuse their sexism

or, to handwave away how they benefit from sexism 

[Daddy88_8]

I love the replies thank you. This was just something I was thinking about, wondering. Take a male child and a female child. At the time when they're prefrontal cortex is in its infancy state. If a little girl likes to wear dress in place with boy toys she's called a tomboy. At least here in America. If a boy plays with girls toys it is forbidden. At least here in America LOL. So are people born submissive and dominant or as their prefrontal cortex matures do they become dominant or submissive?

[***lessKitten]

I don't believe so, but firstly before I try to break down your question, here's some food for thought. In today's world do you believe men are "naturally" more dominant than women?
To answer the above question myself I'd say yes, there are still more naturally dominant men than there are submissive, but there's becoming an increasing number of naturally submissive men which takes away from the dominant. Men and their issues are a whole other topic though lol. Everything below is just my opinion and based on how I see things.

You mentioned "in a natural setting" which leads me to believe you're talking more about personality and less about kink in the bedroom. There's men with dominant personalities that like to let go and submit in the bedroom, so it's important to seperate what you're talking about.

There's a lot of psychology behind what can make someone have a Dominant or submissive personality. Starting as early as childhood, how we're rased by our parents and how we react to experiences that we see, or are apart of, change us as a person.
I believe society forms an image of what people believe is the "normal" or what we should be like as a person. Going back to a time when women were seen less than equal to men, a time where women didn't work a paying job and couldn't vote, they were expected only to stay home, cook, clean and provide a healthy baby. I believe at those times women by nature were more submissive than men, and there were much fewer dominant women back then than there are now, this is because back then society didn't provide women a platform which allowed them to be who they could've been, whereas nowadays that platform is there for some women to use. Right now we're in an age of fighting for equal rights and where feminism is going strong once again. These are being fought for by women who are likely to have a dominant personality, and they're providing the platform many women need to be more of whom they want to be, and for some that's dominant. More and more often today we find women becoming independent and giving themselves more control, which some are finding they like, this can lead to them seeking release in other ways. For example a boss who's in control at work, and in most aspects of life, may want to give up control in the bedroom. This can go for both men and women, and just because they like to submit in the bedroom doesn't make them submissive by nature.

It can take a long time for the general public's perception to change. I think your views on women, and them possibly being naturally submissive, are mostly formed by your immediate surroundings, which is largely controlled by society, which is currently more dominated by men.
It's possible your views come from seeing your father as the head of the family, which lessens how you view your mother in a dominant role. It's possible you work in an industry where it's predominantly men, which contributes in all kind of ways to how the woman feels and how men see her, and going by your name the most obvious one is that you're a Dom yourself, likely straight, so mostly only communicate with sub women which can narrow your perspective.

Short answer is: you should probably understand that as time passes, more women are finding their footing and becoming who they want to be, which is leading to a rise in women who become naturally more dominant.

Hoping my insight was somewhat helpful for you 🙂

[qu****]

I think it's more to do with forgotten conditioning, for instance in the UK generally men walk on the left side of a woman, some say it's through dominance, but it's down to when we used swords, as the majority were/are right-handed the sword was on the left, so to keep it free from obstruction in case of assault/attack a woman would be on the right, thus keeping the sword free, I believe there's loads of things along the same line but now they're just a subconscious memory, on a funnier note the same with chamber pots which were emptied being thrown out of upper windows, it meant men would be drenched not the women. So to say women are naturally submissive it's just down to centuries of forgotten conditioning

[Bitofasecret]

You don't have a mother-in-law and it shows.

[Deleted Member]

6 hours ago, Daddy88_8 said:

I have a question, would you say that all women are by nature submissive. I know that men can be submissive, and women can be dominant. But in a natural type setting are women just naturally submissive

LOL Absolutely not. Do you not believe Dominant women exist? Because there are plenty out there that answer this question without asking. Not even in a "natural" setting are all women submissive.

 

This is projection, in my opinion. You believe women SHOULD be naturally submissive, so this question is asked in a facetious and flippant manner.

 

No. Women are not naturally submissive. In fact, it's most men who are submissive. Look at the over abundance of submissive men seeking Dominant women and ask yourself this question.

[Deleted Member]

No! Generalising half population of this planet is absolutely ridiculous and unintelligent. This kind of remark and judgment were made in the last century and also about other race, think about it

[TeeJay_98]

44 minutes ago, FtMSIRx said:

LOL Absolutely not. Do you not believe Dominant women exist? Because there are plenty out there that answer this question without asking. Not even in a "natural" setting are all women submissive.

 

This is projection, in my opinion. You believe women SHOULD be naturally submissive, so this question is asked in a facetious and flippant manner.

 

No. Women are not naturally submissive. In fact, it's most men who are submissive. Look at the over abundance of submissive men seeking Dominant women and ask yourself this question.

Did u feel me bashing the like button on this? 😂 

Well said 👏🏻 thankyou

[pt****]

Drawing influence from nature is very simplistic. The primal instinct area of our brain is the very centre and small. Our natural instinct is somewhat redundant as we have evolved. Society has more or less a degree of influence on our traits than nature. Only my opinion

[qu****]

8 hours ago, Daddy88_8 said:

I love the replies thank you. This was just something I was thinking about, wondering. Take a male child and a female child. At the time when they're prefrontal cortex is in its infancy state. If a little girl likes to wear dress in place with boy toys she's called a tomboy. At least here in America. If a boy plays with girls toys it is forbidden. At least here in America LOL. So are people born submissive and dominant or as their prefrontal cortex matures do they become dominant or submissive?

Along this line it's similar to is religion real, if you were raised totally away from any mention of God and religion would you believe in it, the original post isn't as simplistic as it appears, I will add this is in no way an invitation to discuss religion

[Deleted Member]

3 hours ago, FtMSIRx said:

LOL Absolutely not. Do you not believe Dominant women exist? Because there are plenty out there that answer this question without asking. Not even in a "natural" setting are all women submissive.

 

This is projection, in my opinion. You believe women SHOULD be naturally submissive, so this question is asked in a facetious and flippant manner.

 

No. Women are not naturally submissive. In fact, it's most men who are submissive. Look at the over abundance of submissive men seeking Dominant women and ask yourself this question.

"It's most men who are submissive" - what? You've just decried the OP for asking if most women are sub and then claimed most men are! Don't have a go at someone (who is trying to learn as far as I can tell) and then do the same thing.

[ey****]

5 hours ago, FtMSIRx said:

Look at the over abundance of submissive men seeking Dominant women and ask yourself this question.

this gets into a different thing but

someone who has fantasies that could see them in a position deemed submissive does not equate to being submissive

whilst 'sub' guys are particularly vocal about their desires - this moreso distorts the picture.  

but also

that the OP was alluding to wider society

[Deleted Member]

7 hours ago, Curvykate said:

"It's most men who are submissive" - what? You've just decried the OP for asking if most women are sub and then claimed most men are! Don't have a go at someone (who is trying to learn as far as I can tell) and then do the same thing.

The difference is, that one is a fact if you have any experience in this lifestyle and the other is a stereotype trope.

 

The majority of men seeking a female Dominant are over abundant compared to the reverse.

 

Period. End of story.

 

I'll have a go at ANYONE trying to suggest women are "naturally" submissive by default when proof shows it's men in this lifestyle with such desires as opposed to women. 

This isn't a comparison war. This is plenty of lived experience across a multitude of communities over a period of 16 years that proves that to be true.

 

Sorry not sorry.

[Deleted Member]

9 hours ago, TeeJay_98 said:

Did u feel me bashing the like button on this? 😂 

Well said 👏🏻 thankyou

Facts are facts, ya know? <3

[Deleted Member]

No women are not naturally submissive, nor are men naturally Dominant. In BDSM it can be noted that the sterotypical roles expected of men and women in vanilla life are reversed for many, wherein men are submissive, and women are Dominant. The nuture v nature argument has been discussed in many things, and to be honest in the majority of contexts neither have been shown to have a greater impact. Who one is in terms of submission or Dominance in BDSM if that is ones interest will for the most part the result of a combination of factors, nature, life experience, friends, family, nuture, culture etc. From discussions with a number of sub/slaves and Dominants of all genders, Myself included few can really put their finger on how they come to sit on one side of the slash or the other, or why they have the fetishes they do. W/we just do, and the best thing is to have fun exploring, enjoy what ever it is that turns you on and makes you happy. At the end of the day never assume why one gender over an other may gravitate towards one thing and not another, people are who they are, and like what they like and that's ok.

[ey****]

2 hours ago, FtMSIRx said:

The majority of men seeking a female Dominant are over abundant compared to the reverse.

 

Just to make a small correction

The majority of men seeking a female Dominant are over vocal compared to the reverse.

 

[Deleted Member]

5 hours ago, FtMSIRx said:

The difference is, that one is a fact if you have any experience in this lifestyle and the other is a stereotype trope.

 

The majority of men seeking a female Dominant are over abundant compared to the reverse.

 

Period. End of story.

 

I'll have a go at ANYONE trying to suggest women are "naturally" submissive by default when proof shows it's men in this lifestyle with such desires as opposed to women. 

This isn't a comparison war. This is plenty of lived experience across a multitude of communities over a period of 16 years that proves that to be true.

 

Sorry not sorry.

Even 16 years of experience cannot claim "most men are submissive" as a fact. It's your experience and your opinion - it's not something that can be proved or validated. Any more than the original poster's assertion. And I venture that others on this site with similar years of experience would not agree with you.

[qu****]

I must admit to being slightly confused by some
who are fixating on the BDSM aspect of submission, rather than the ops point of in a natural setting, also it doesn't even say he believes this to be the case merely a question for debate, though it's probably my simplistic approach that I see it that way

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, quietlysure said:

I must admit to being slightly confused by some
who are fixating on the BDSM aspect of submission, rather than the ops point of in a natural setting, also it doesn't even say he believes this to be the case merely a question for debate, though it's probably my simplistic approach that I see it that way

I agree - I read the OP the same way. Nor do I think that sexual submissiveness = submissiveness elsewhere in life necessarily.